Finding it really hard

[Mumof42009]

My little boy was born last thurs and yesterday i got discharged from hospital im finding it so so hard being away from him yesterday i spent most of the evening in tears and worried that something was going to happen to him while i wasnt there. I should be used to the journey after being there 3 times already but this time im finding it so so hard then i had some insensitive bitch say to me 'wheres your baby' when i told her she said 'alot of these premmies die' i just walked away got really upset and i was doing well all day hadnt cried then had that insensitive bitch say that to me.

 

[Dona]

Aww hun, don't beat yourself up for thinking that just because you have done this 3 times before you should be OK. I totally understand how your feeling right now and bitches like that should be 'bitch slapped'! Is the hospital near your home? Can you get up there every day to see your little prince?

You need lots of cuddles from him to cheer you up. Is he well enough for cuddles yet, if so...get asking for them!

Sending lots of strength hugs your way xxxx

Dona xx

 

[bumpsmum]

Lisa,

Firstly congrats on the safe arrival of baby Adi he is truly beautiful.


It is really hard to come home without your baby I can only imagine how you must be feeling doing this for the 4th time , you know we are all here to support you and for somewhere to come and vent. Im really sorry you had to deal with such a nasty piece of work like that I truly am.

I know its probably no concelation you'll want to just spend of your time with Adi but try and use these times apart to rest, spend time with your girls and get organised for his homecoming which I am sure will come around in no time at all.

Dont feel bad about getting emotional, its a really emotional time for you and your family and only natural, sometimes a right good cry is what we need.

Im always around feel free to PM me if you wanna chat x

 

[Mumof42009]

Thanks
Im doing better today but just that comment made me cry all over again its so hard being without him i could bear anything happening to him the hospital is 30 mins away i go in the day and his dad goes at night to see him im always on the phone to them as well they must think im a mad woman! Im just praying he isnt in there too long but he is on highest level of care at the min so think its going to be a good few weeks before he is home unless he suprises me, he is off cpap and only in air in his incubator and taking 15mls of milk every hour i try to breast feed when i go so i can have cuddles with him as well which helps me.

 

[DonnaBallona]

Congratulations on the birth of your sweet baby boy!!!

Thats FABULOUS news he is having 15mls of milk already-he is huuuuuungry! Brooke had 1 ml every hour at 6 days haha. How much did he weigh?

I know its horrid at the moment, but he really is in the best place and they will take such good care of him. And if you want to call the unit every hour, then DO IT!! I used to in the night, If I woke up for a wee or a drink, Id call

And as for that woman, insensitive cow, Id have said something utterly vile back to her. I really would have done. You dont need to hear that and she is WRONG.

We are thinking of you, and hope you graaduate soon xx

 

[Bec L]

Congratulations, he is gorgeous.

A lot of us on here can sympathise with how you're feeling hun, makes no difference how many times you have been though it before. You just want that beautiful baby home where he belongs.

You know we are all here if you need us and keep us updated on his progress. Sounds like he is doing great so far.
xxxx

 

[nkbapbt]

Congratulations honey! He is a perfect little preemie prince!!

I cannot believe that woman said that to you! I would have said something nasty back to her..but Im bad that way.

I don't think it's fair to yourself to say you should be use to it by now...why should you be? Because you have been through it before? Heck, it is not something that EVER gets easier hon. Stop beating yourself up.

I am so happy to read he doing so well! What a little superstar!!

 

[premmiemum123]

Congratulations on the birth of Aditiya, he is gorgeous.
AM so pleased he is off CPAP, that is huge progress in a short space of time. You must be so proud of your little fighter.

I agree with everyone above, no matter how many times you go through an experience like this it is hard. Each experience must be so different and it is all relative. I think if I went through this again I would find it just as difficult so please don't beat yourself up about it. As Bec L has commented, everyone on this forum is here for you, rooting for your little man and here to share your experience and offer comfort...take care of yourself and please keep us updated...xx

 

[Mumof42009]

Thanks so much for the support ive been a bit better the past few days think it was just the shock of him being so well when he was born then being rushed into nicu. He is doing so much better now he is having feeds every 3 hours and keeping them down, we have found out he has reflux so he is being put on gaviscon when he goes to full breast or bottle feeds. No longer in his incubator he looks a big boy in his cot, no more monitors apart from his breathing one so fx crossed things are on the up from now on. They should be moving him today to the nursery so he has missed a room theirs specialist care (where he is), HDI, then the nursery. Im having problems with my breast milk not getting enough out i had a really good supply and now seems like its going the nurses are putting loads pressure on me and im telling them im doing my best i think its all the stress as well as had my dd's ill at home and other problems im still expressing but he is being topped up with formula.
Thanks again to you all xx

 

[MiissMuffet]

what a horrible lady! I hope you made her feel bad for saying that! I hope you're doing ok, and congrats on baby x

 

[bumpsmum]

wow lisa what a diffeence a few days makes eh, big boy cot and down to 1 monitor Adi will be home in no time sorry the girls are sick that must be really hard juggling caring for them and the hospital runs hopefully it wont be long.

Stress can play a big factor with your milk coming in but give it time if your happy for Adi to be supplemented with formula in the meantime stick with expressing when you can as your milk will come in again, are they given you an opportunity for skin to skin and maybe trying to latch seeing as he's out the incubator? these will help your milk as well x

 

[Mumof42009]

I try before feeds when im there to get him to the breast he will take it for a while then he falls asleep. The same happened with my milk when girls were in scbu it lasted about 2 weeks and then slowly started to go i even had tablets last time to boost it but didnt help, the nurse i spoke to yesterday said i'd given him the best start so dont worry but alot of the others have been really horrible about it.

 

[bumpsmum]

thats awful NO WAY you should be treated like that, your under enough stress just now without nurses who should know better, being so in-sensitive, can you request a breast-feeding counsellor/nurse to come and have a chat im sure she'll be more receptive. If you feel the nurses are not being supportive if it was me Id ask to speak to the charge/head nurse and complain, maybe thats just me im in a bit of a mood today (sorry ) x x

 

[DiddyDons]

Congrats hun, hope hes doing well. Sorry you have to leave him there though x