For those that don't/can't temp...

[ChocLover]

What do you consider to be your fertile window? We may be getting it wrong, it seems.

I don't/can't temp because if I know I'm going to temp I simply don't sleep properly - I wake up several times during the night and struggle to fall back asleep - which is not conducive to getting reliable measures.

I thought I could assume that ovulation occurs 14 days before my next period - but apparently I can't assume that. I read an article that actually, only 10% of women ovulate exactly 14 days prior to their next period - and in fact, there's huge variability around when women ovulate. The article recommended that, if you don't temp, take CD 6 - CD 21 as your fertile window.

What do you guys think?

I'm unhappy about this because DH has performance anxiety issues which we deal with by taking Viagra around the fertile window (he's ok with having sex normally - he just has issues when he knows he "has" to perform) .. but even that takes a bit of a toll and so the thought of expanding the window beyond 6 days - hey, practically doubling the size of the window, does not make me happy.

I guess we'll have to go from every day, to every other day, based on the new expanded window - but even so - that's not good as it's still a longer period of time where we have to worry about performance issues.

Grrrr. I wish there was a sure fire way of knowing when I ovulate. Perhaps I should get an OPK? Are they reliable?

 

[Cheekygringo]

buy ovulation predictor kit sticks.. (OPKS)

just like pregnancy tests, except they test for luteinising hormone, with your body produces to tell it to release the egg. These are also available online cheapies.

Edited to add,

They aren't sure fire. Unless you get your doctor to do specific tests for this, if you cant temp, this is the next best thing.

 

[Ward]

I'm in the same boat you are, so I don't have much advice, but my fiance has had similar issues in the past. I was thinking, maybe you could expand the window and not tell him that you are?

I kind of have to do the same thing. We have an awesome sex life and he's totally on board with what we're doing, but he wants no parts of knowing my fertile days and whatnot...lol. He wants this to be a "glorious accident".

If I told him we were trying, I'm not so sure he'd be able to muster the strength if you know what I mean.... so yeah. Totally keeping him out of the loop for the sake of our collective mental health.

So maybe you could just not tell him, and leave the pressure off?

 

[Moet]

I also can't temp as I do shiftwork, so work nights and days. Impossible to temp. I havent tried anything yet except have started trying to track cervical fluid. You can easily google how to track it...basically the thinner and stretchier the more fertile and it should coincide with your fertile window in an ideal world. But I agree...just expand your window and not tell your other half? My DH also has had some issues "finishing the job" when the pressure is on and I say anything like "we NEED to have sex tonight" lol. Hard tho with my shift work...sometimes we do NEED to because I wont see him for 3 days sometimes when im working nights...

 

[swizzle3]

I took my temps for 4 months to confirm my O before TTC. I have never ovulated on CD14, its either CD13 or CD16 and my LP is only 11 days so i would have been completely off if i was just assuming i had a 14 LP.

I think temping or at the very least using OPK's is very important for a few cycles to see the pattern your body has.

And my DH is the same. Having the pressure to perform is the only time he has performance issues. So BDing every other day during the fertile window might be a better plan.

 

[SeaofSerenity]

I've used ovulation microscopes. You can find them on amazon. If you can spit on them in the morning before brushing your teeth, you can track pretty easily. That's how I found I've been having a hormone imbalance.

 

[MissEyre]

I only use cervical fluid. When I get ewcm, I know I'm in my fertile window.