For those that spend nights away from their OH...

[Broody85]

Do you expect to hear from them before bed?

I work until late most nights and my oh works 8-6ish most days. He goes to bed before me. Usually he is great at contacting me but 3 nights in this past week he has gone to bed and apparently passed out, therefore not text or rang me goodnight. Am I being silly for being annoyed over this? I understand he is exhausted but I just don't get how you can get into bed and pass out before having time to text your girlfriend good night? He has apologised but at the same time he doesn't see why I'm upset because he does contact me every day?

P.S. we live in different cities.

 

[emyandpotato]

Nah I wouldn't expect it really. It'd be nice but I know sometimes he has other things on his mind!

 

[Bittersweet]

My oh does but I don't really expect him too as sometimes I don't finish at the time I'm supposed to. We live together but I work nights or sleepovers

 

[Pearls18]

Hubby always texts me good night if he is able to contact me, or I do if I am going to bed first. Even before him working away we have done through me being at uni, possibly even teenagers in high school actually. It's just something we both did, not something we asked of the other.

 

[Abigailly]

No, I don't. I respect that he's exhausted and has his mind elsewhere. I expect him to contact me at some point during the day while he's away. But only so I know he's alive.

Has he contacted you at some point on those days?

 

[Broody85]

Yeah he has, he usually texts through the day then rings me at 5/6 for 5-10 mins.

I think maybe I am being a bit unreasonable? I used to have the same argument with my ex too. I guess because he is one of the last things I think about before bed, I would just like the same in return? Not saying I'm not if he doesn't text me but I guess it just proves that he cares and is thinking about me if he texts?

 

[emyandpotato]

Yeah he has, he usually texts through the day then rings me at 5/6 for 5-10 mins.

I think maybe I am being a bit unreasonable? I used to have the same argument with my ex too. I guess because he is one of the last things I think about before bed, I would just like the same in return? Not saying I'm not if he doesn't text me but I guess it just proves that he cares and is thinking about me if he texts?

I was like this with my ex! Thinking about it now though I think it's more because I felt so insecure in myself and in the relationship that I needed that constant contact and reassurance. Getting annoyed at the lack of contact will only make things worse, in my opinion, as that alone isn't something to really be annoyed at, BUT it's definitely worth evaluating how you feel in the relationship and in yourself overall.

 

[Broody85]

Yeah he has, he usually texts through the day then rings me at 5/6 for 5-10 mins.

I think maybe I am being a bit unreasonable? I used to have the same argument with my ex too. I guess because he is one of the last things I think about before bed, I would just like the same in return? Not saying I'm not if he doesn't text me but I guess it just proves that he cares and is thinking about me if he texts?

I was like this with my ex! Thinking about it now though I think it's more because I felt so insecure in myself and in the relationship that I needed that constant contact and reassurance. Getting annoyed at the lack of contact will only make things worse, in my opinion, as that alone isn't something to really be annoyed at, BUT it's definitely worth evaluating how you feel in the relationship and in yourself overall.

I think I am just quite a needy person. I live alone and get lonely and often wait for his call or text coz its kind of company for me.

He just rang me now, bless him. He was half asleep. He fell asleep whilst texting me earlier on and woke for the loo and thought he had to ring me. I told him that he was being daft and I was sorry for being a bit crazy. I don't want him to be thinking every night that he HAS to ring me or I will be annoyed...I would just like him to want to!?

 

[MrsButterfly]

I used to travel a bit for work and often had nights away. If possible I'd call DH before bed but on occasions I'd end up distracted if colleagues were with me too and time would fly past before I knew it and I didn't then want to risk waking him up.

I'm like you tho that I always like to hear from him before I go to sleep - it settles my mind.

 

[TwilightAgain]

I'd be annoyed. OH and I live together now but when we didn't he knew he'd be in trouble if he didn't he was always the last thing on my mind before I went to sleep so I couldn't forget really, I expected him to have the same standards it only takes 2 minutes to text someone.

 

[bananaboat]

Yes. If we're ever apart (for work travel, trips, etc.), we always make it a point to call or text to say good morning and good night.

 

[x__amour]

Yes. DH used to work nights and we'd always talk before DD and I went off to sleep. Sometimes he works really late evenings and I'll be tired and we always say goodnight now as well.

 

[Boomerslady]

I'd be annoyed. I've just started seeing someone (it's very early days) but he lives about 2 hours away and we msg each other morning and night each day. Like you said it's that wanting to know they're thinking about you. Because you can't cuddle up and kiss each other good night that little msg is the same as that.

 

[Mummy May]

Weve only ever spent 3 nights apart, but yeah we both expect it of each other xx

 

[Leah_Marie]

When DH is on nights, if he can he'll send me a text about 10.30pm. Of course it's not always possible but when he can he does.

 

[kerrie24]

If it wasnt arranged I wouldnt be bothered but since its a routine I would be worried if he didnt.My mams bf always falls asleep without texting when he has said he would.I said to him you cant fall asleep standing up so text before you sit/lie down then you cant fall asleep lol.

 

[suzib76]

Not usually, if I am in a hotel and bored I will call him but if I am out or working nights or away I don't bother

About 3 or so years ago I went to london to meet with some freinds, my train to where I was staying (1.5 hours away) was at 6pm. I updated facebook at 10.45pm saying I was still in london and my phone rang almost instantly. I had forgotten to even tell him my last min change of plan due to lots of wine lol

So nah it's not something we really do

 

[LittleBunnie]

:wave: I am super needy and my husband caters to that. I know that if he hasn't called/skyped/texted than that means something bad has happened.

So if he didn't I'd be a bit worried.

 

[staceymxxx]

I do this, lay in bed watching tv and pass out... OH use to it by now lol!