FTM question

[ChaiTea]

So in a couple weeks I will begin breastfeeding for the first time! I am hoping and praying to do so for a full year at least. I've been nervous about how it will go and the other night I had a dream that it felt so strange and uncomfortable that I didn't want to do it!!! I am detrrmined that it will work.
What DOES it feel like those first few times? I haven't even had any leaking yet (38 weeks today) so I'm also a little nervous about how odd that will be when I actually see milk coming out for the first time!

 

[CupcakeBaby]

The first few times are lovely.

But then your nipples get tender and it begins to hurt and that's when it starts to be a struggle for a few weeks.

Also this early days baby can be feeding for hours and hours on end - which is a good thing but it doesn't feel like it at the time.

Then one day you realise if doesn't hurt anymore and you're SO glad you didn't quit all the times you were crying and wishing there was another option. (I couldn't bring myself to give DD formula so to me there was no other option.)

Most important to remember is there WILL come a day when you love BFing and you're doing the best thing for your baby.

 

[ChaiTea]

Love your response! I do not want any formula in my baby, so I'm so determined but so nervous. Everyone tells me to just relax and keep at it... Can't wait to think back to this time and smile at how silly I was.

 

[Juicyg]

I think cupcake baby has really summed it up well.
I have been breast feeding for just over 5 weeks and I must say I was not prepared at all as to how hard it would be.
Everyone goes on about how good breast feeding is for your baby but fail to mention exactly how hard it is for the mummy.
I am still learning day by day all the different things to do with breast feeding so I think you researching before hand is a great idea.
I also think that the fact that you are so determined means that you will successfully breast feed. It's the determination that keeps me going.

The other thing that keeps me going is that although at the beginning the cracked nipples hurt (and they really did hurt!) And the feeding as much as they want is quite demanding and the fact that I also developed mastitis -ouch! The closeness you get from it is something I can't quite describe. Also I feel like I'm really providing for my baby if that makes sense...!

Good luck with the birth of your little one and also with the breastfeeding x

 

[CupcakeBaby]

I think you researching before hand is a great idea.

I also think that the fact that you are so determined means that you will successfully breast feed. It's the determination that keeps me going.

This 100%.

Arm yourself now with as much knowledge as you can. And don't have any formula in the house!

There will be days when baby feeds for HOURS and cries when he/she isn't.

These are the days that people quit on - you know, the ones who tell you they didn't have enough milk.

Supplementing on those days is the worst thing you can do. Your baby and your boobs need those cluster feeds to get your supply up.

I'm SO glad I knew about them in advance as you'd seriously worry if you didn't know it was normal. X

 

[ChaiTea]

I got a ton of formula samples in the mail and made the mistake of posting them to Facebook, innocently asking if anyone wanted them. I got flamed! So many people said I would need it for supplementing. They told me they had to supplement a few feedings every day. I wanted to yell back and tell them that supplementing was the cause of all their problems! I would never criticize anyone for using formula (well perhaps silently in my head!) but I have frequently been openly criticized for saying I intend on only breastfeeding.

 

[CupcakeBaby]

Sounds familiar Hun.

Easiest thing is to just smile and know inside that you're doing your best.

What annoys me is when people tell me I'm lucky for being able to breastfeed! I'm not lucky. I worked the hardest I've ever worked in my life. Blood, sweat and tears to BF. and they think its luck?!? Grrrrr.

Anyway, I digress - You sound like you know exactly what's best.

Those early days are tough but it's sooo worth it.

If you want you're welcome to add me on Facebook as I'm always by my phone so you can message me and I'll help you out the days you're struggling. It really helped me having someone who had been through it. X

 

[NurseSooz]

Cupcake baby has said everything I would. Pushing through the breastfeeding struggles makes you stronger and feel awesome. Once you're established the bond is awesome. Don't expect it to be easy but once you get it nailed you'll never look back. I'd say its the hardest but most awesome thing ever. We'll hopefully be seeing more of you on the boob side of the forum in the coming weeks. It's a great line of support and help.

 

[CupcakeBaby]

Also meant to say

Get some lanolin (Lansinoh is the best one) and use it before and after every feed. Don't wait until you need it.

I really noticed a difference if I forgot. I think I stopped needing it around 10 weeks or so but it was a lifesaver.

 

[NurseSooz]

What she said! ^

 

[Pielette]

It's not easy... at first. At first I found it really hard. My nipples got very sore. I knew our latch was good though so it was a case of my nipples getting used to it. Hardly surprising really, they have tiny powerful mouths!

I remember one night when he was on my boobs for about 7 hours. Oh my God I cried buckets. It hurt, I was knackered, my husband was frustrated cos he felt completely useless. He didn't suggest bottles because he knew how much I wanted BF to work but really wanted to.

It didn't work out with my first because I was completely naive about what was normal. This time I was utterly determined and it's paid off.

It may hurt, you may encounter problems like thrush or mastitis and I'd be surprised if you get through the first couple of weeks without contemplating formula. But just get through one feed at a time, one day at a time. There will be times when baby doesn't seem satisfied and is fussy on the breast, pulling off and crying etc, going back on and repeat. But that is normal. It's baby's way of yelling at your boobs, make more milk! And they do.

Low supply is a real thing, however the way to know if you have that problem is to look at your baby. Plenty of wet and dirty nappies mean things are working well. Gaining weight and developing well, bright and alert when awake and not tired.

It is the most satisfying thing in the world to look at your baby getting all chubby and knowing I did that. Just me.

My husband jokes that I make double cream rather than milk going by the chub my Milo is putting on!

 

[DJJ]

also if u need help ask.my boy didn't latch on for obey 24 hours in hospital but i asked for help every time and it did work.I've been feeding him for a year now and only had problems the first week and then one bout of mastisis. the first time he latched i cried with joy.i can't describe how i felt each suck and swallow,now i hardly feel it.it is an amazing feeling.best wiahes to u an your baby

 

[Fortune Cooki]

The first 2 months were hellishly painful, but I'm stubborn, so I kept going. At 3 months my left nipple still feels uncomfortable, but the right one is great. I recommend babywearing and feeding like that, because you will be hands free.

 

[TheNewMrs]

OkUmmm NO breastfeeding is NOT supposed to HURT.
It's common for it to hurt, but it's not normal.
Pain indicates something isn't right. Usually the latch for one reason or another. If it hurts please see a Lactation Consultant or a LaLeche Leader.

The first feed for me felt strange. I was very nervous too. It got more "normal" feeling but by day 3 I was in tears. My baby was tongue tied and couldn't latch properly so her mouth wan't where it needed to be and she was sucking on the nipple rather than milking the breast and I ended up with cracked and bleeding nipples. It wasn't pleasent. I had herd it was "normal" to be in pain so I fobbed it off. Until I couldn't bf anymore and stopped. Thankfully my daughter had other ideas and we re lactated and are still nursing at 17 months.

But please please do not believe that pain is normal. That belief nearly cost us our breastfeeding relationship. A little discomfort is normal. If it becomes painful please seek help. Feeding a baby should never hurt. (Now a toddler doing handstands and kicking you in the teeth is another story! )

Good luck Mama.

 

[CupcakeBaby]

OkUmmm NO breastfeeding is NOT supposed to HURT.
It's common for it to hurt, but it's not normal.


But please please do not believe that pain is normal. That belief nearly cost us our breastfeeding relationship. A little discomfort is normal. If it becomes painful please seek help. Feeding a baby should never hurt.

I think saying things like that can cost breastfeeding relationships.

Babies suck hard. Your nipples aren't used to that sort of treatment.

If someone sucked on your finger for 16 hours a day it would hurt.

My nipples never cracked or bled but they felt bruised and very sore when she latched on each time (pain subsided after a minute) which is perfectly normal.

If I'd believed the whole "it only hurts if you're doing it wrong" thing I'd have quit.

 

[Pielette]

OkUmmm NO breastfeeding is NOT supposed to HURT.
It's common for it to hurt, but it's not normal.


But please please do not believe that pain is normal. That belief nearly cost us our breastfeeding relationship. A little discomfort is normal. If it becomes painful please seek help. Feeding a baby should never hurt.

I think saying things like that can cost breastfeeding relationships.

Babies suck hard. Your nipples aren't used to that sort of treatment.

If someone sucked on your finger for 16 hours a day it would hurt.

My nipples never cracked or bled but they felt bruised and very sore when she latched on each time (pain subsided after a minute) which is perfectly normal.

If I'd believed the whole "it only hurts if you're doing it wrong" thing I'd have quit.

Same here My nipples were sore and tender but not cracked or bleeding.

 

[TheNewMrs]

Babies don't actually suck on the nipple. If they do then something isn't right. I didnt say "You're doing it wrong"- I would never say that to a mother. I said something isn't quite right. Which is true. A baby milks the breast by using the tongue and pressing it upwards towards the soft palette.

Yes discomfort is absolutely normal I am not disputing that. But pain isn't normal and almost alway indicates that something needs to be tweeked to make feeding painless.

 

[NurseSooz]

I was told we had a perfect latch but my nips were grazed and bleeding. The lactation specialist said its just that nips aren't used to being tugged on to that extent! The pain was only at the start of the feed and subsided after a min or so.