Help! Feel like I'm going crazy!

[gracexxx]

I'm finding things soo tough lately! I've been feeling soo down and keep crying.
I feel like I just need someone to tell me it's ok, and I'm not going crazy!
LO is 15 months and I'm finding it all just soo difficult! I live on my own and have done for the last 7 months. Ive always been on my own and Things have always been tough, I developed PND shortly after having LO but progressively I've managed to deal with it.
Lately it's just been soo hard, I feel I need a break sometimes, but have no one to look after LO for me, it's just soo full on.
I just want her to be happy, but I know she's suffering because I'm constantly stressed and upset.
I feel awful!

 

[Dream.dream]

You really need a break even if just for a few hours . Can you lol for a baby sitter to hire ? If you find a good person even if you have to pay them the break is helpful to de stress .

 

[gracexxx]

I know, I just have always felt a bit guilty about the thought of leaving her with someone she's not used to. It's really just me and her. But you're right I need a break and if that means hiring a babysitter I'll have to do that.

 

[Dezireey]

I agree, I think you need to consider a bit of time out. Even if its just once a month, it will do you some good. There are day nurseries and some nurseries and play groups will have a baby / toddler for just an hour or two sometimes. There are also nice options to look into like hairdressers with crèches on site or beauty salons with crèches. A haircut or facial with baby in the next room might make you feel better about leaving her.

As for a babysitter, well they all start out as strangers to all babies, it's a process to get baby used to a particular sitter until they are happy to stay with them.

You need a break hun, it is good for both you and baby. A happy mum = happy baby

 

[gracexxx]

Thanks, I know, I want to be happy and independent and love being a mummy...and i do most of the time, but sometimes it's all just too much! And I feel guilty and a failure!.
I never expected to be soo alone, sometimes I just feel I have no one and I'm soo lonely, LO deserves more.
I like the idea of getting my hair done whilst LO is in a crèche! I'm going to look into that.

 

[daneuse27]

A break is important! You work very hard, and absolutely need and deserve one. Itll be good for you, and for LO.

A couple suggestions: have you looked into moms groups, or single mom groups in your area? You could make friends, and sometimes that leads to babysitting swapping (they watch your child for free, you can watch theirs another night for free.) Some might want to help you especially since you're on your own.

Another idea is having a short visit with the babysitter before she looks after your LO unsupervised. She would meet your daughter for the first time at the interview, so you could see their first reaction to each other. And then ask her to come by for a trial 30 mins or so on a different day to spend time with your LO while you maybe do some cleaning, or pop out quickly (dont go far.) This is what a mom asked me to do when she hired me to babysit her kids, and I thought it was good for the kids to get to know me before I took them under my care for hours. Im sure almost any sitter serious about the job would agree to it

Also, there are many gyms that offer child care, so that mothers can work out.

You've come a very long way, and dont feel guilty at all about taking some time to yourself. You're human and you need to look after yourself too.

 

[gracexxx]

I go to a single parent group but not many people go or people go sparatically so it's hard to meet people and form a friendship.
I've met one other mum from there and we meet up from time to time for the day out, which is of course brilliant but not the same as having some time to myself.
The idea of a babysitter meeting LO and having some short time with her is a brilliant idea! I think it would really put my mind at ease knowing its not going to be hours at a time with a complete stranger.
Thanks so much for your suggestions

 

[Jennaxo]

I'm sure every mum feels like this sometimes, it's okay to feel like that! You sound like a mummy just in need of a break!