Home Birth being encouraged by midwife

[BrandiCanucks]

I've wanted to do a home birth since my second child. I had a traumatic birth, recovery, and experience with my oldest child delivering in a hospital and had my heart set on a midwife and home birth for my second child. My ex-husband would not allow it. We visited the midwife, but he decided he was more comfortable with a doctor and was dead set against a home birth. I had an unmedicated birth with my son, in a hospital, and it was good, because he swallowed the plug on his way out and stopped breathing when he was three hours old.

For my third child, I had left my husband and saw a midwife and by the time I was halfway through my pregnancy, I wasn't changing care, but my ex still would not allow me to have a home birth, and after the scare with my son, I became afraid of a home birth too. My youngest was a very quicky, unmedicated labour and delivery, in a hospital, and I went home after only three hours.

I loved my midwife so much that this time around, I decided to go the midwife route again. I had my first appointment today and I have the same midwives that delivered my daughter, and today's appointment confirmed to me that I'm making the right decision for care.

But one question that came up was whether I'd be having a hospital or a home birth. I still have my heart dead set on a home birth, but that experience with my son has me frightened. And now I'm single, so if this labour follows my last two and starts in the middle of the night, it won't be easy for me to find a babysitter for me to get to the hospital, and my mom is nearly an hour away, and I could give birth before she gets here.

I told my midwife I was torn. Part of me still wants to experience that home birth, and the other part still fears what happened with my son. I also let her know that one of my deciding factors is going to be the sex of the baby. If the baby is a girl, I'll likely go homebirth. But if it's a boy, he'll be circumcised and I'd rather do that in a hospital.

She said to me that that shouldn't be my deciding factor in whether I have a home birth or not and if I have a boy and want him circumcised, they can help me set that up after birth.

It made me feel really comfortable with the idea of a home birth...but then there's what happened with my son coming into play, so I don't know what decision to make.

I want a home birth, but if something goes wrong, I'm 10 minutes from the hospital. Is there anyone here who had a hospital birth and then a home birth?

 

[RaspberryK]

Right well, I had a long natural no pain relief labour at home with midwife but I wasn't progressing so I went to hospital and turned out I was fully dilated so birthed him and we were in and out in 3 hours.
They made me lie in bed on my back which was extremely uncomfortable, and I was given the injection for the afterbirth without consent.
This time I'm definitely staying home, I'm being phoned back tomorrow with my booking appointment and scan date.
I am all for the most natural and as little medical interference as possible, but you need to be comfortable with it.
You've 6 months to change your mind so don't worry too much.
Is there any way your mum could visit you for a few weeks to help take care of your other children and for when you are in labour? Xx

 

[BrandiCanucks]

Sorry for the delayed response...my daughter was hospitalized for a few days.

Unfortunately, my mom lives out of town and is at least a 45 minute drive from me. My labours have been quite quick, with the last being 4h45m start to finish. My second child, I went from 7cm to 10cm in 3 minutes, and 10cm to birth in 12 minutes.

Now that I'm a single parent, a home birth might even be a good idea, cuz I'm not sure I can find someone to take 3 kids at 2:30am on short notice.

 

[RaspberryK]

She would make it I'm sure, but I guess hb would be easier in your situation.
It would be good to have her on standby and to support you if you need it.
Xx