Horrid Comments

[smartiepants]

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[pinklizzy]

I don't have any advice, but just wanted to send you some People can be so horrid.

 

[xsophiexleax]

That's horrid, they have no right whatsoever to say that to you!
My cousin has Aspergers and it's not as bad as some people make out.
Please don't take it to heart & don't doubt your ability as a prospect parent.. I'm sure you'll make a great mum! xx

 

[smartiepants]

Thanks! You're right, it really isn't that big a deal. My biggest problem is not being able to tell if someone is joking or not....hardly constitutes mentally unstable!

 

[xsophiexleax]

No it doesn't really! It's obviously not nice to have but when someone says "mentally unstable" it makes it sound like whoever has it is a nutcase! But you seem pretty stable & sure of what you want & they can screw it if they don't like it!

 

[princess_bump]

no advice but wanted to send lots of these xx

 

[elmaxie]

Ignore them...you are above their views!

I got the you cant bring up a child without a man comments when I was going to use donor sperm to concieve....my reply was well I would rather bring a child into the world that was going to be loved by me and have a stable home than bring a child into a home that is not stable with a father figure who I dont love and is not going to bring the best to the home or the childs life!

I think some people just have a blinkered view on things and are so stubborn to view things another way.

I actually read in the local paper yesterday that a woman was shocked by the amount of young mums and whe she automatically looked at their left ring finger and saw no wedding band was utterly shocked!
I mean come on! Who is to say how that person got pregnant or what their situation is? Plus I never wore my wedding band for months as it never fitted me!
PLUS mums are getting younger as the age for bearing a child raises...

Grrrr sorry I went off on a rant there!

As I said you are doing what is best for your child and you. Your child will be loved and have a loving home. Unlike a hell of alot of kids these days WITH father figures. It seems like every week we hear about another child being abused/tortured by parents or friends some until death...they have father figures.....



Emma.xx

 

[Debz82]

i think that is a horrible thing to say and agree wiv elmaxie u hear all sorts of horrible stories these days about children being abused and many do come from 2 parent families. its not goin to make u a bad parent, times are changing!!

xx

 

[Eightiesbirdx]

Well thats a horrible thing to say!. Take no notice of them hun just because you have a disability doesn't affect what kind of a parent you'll be chin up hun and dont let them get you down xx

 

[Amygdala]

Goodness, how on earth does he think he has a right to talk to you like that??? Don't listen! Yeah, it'd be nice to have a dad for the LO. But there isn't one around and you say you might not be able to have LOs later. I think most women will understand why you're doing what you're doing. And I think children can grow up perfectly healthy and happy in one parent families. Hell, who's to say that the man you're having a baby with will still be there in a year, even if he's there initially... I think you're putting a lot more thought into this than a lot of women who have children with men. You live your life and if people have to talk, let them talk. You're way above that!

 

[calm]

 

[shorman]

Yeh that was horrible bit the no father bit I think you no children should come from a act of love and children do kneed both parents in there life as it's more stable life for them and you get when there older they will want to no who there dad is and you do really kneed to think of these things fir the childs happyness not being horrible I just work with children like this and they and they do find it hard seeying other children with two parents and wondering why they don't have a daddy. X

 

[impatient1]

I say he has no right to say things like that and just try your best to ignore it. If that's what you want to do you will have tons of people to support you in your decision and his obviously doesn't matter.

 

[orange zebra]

no right to say that!
you will do great as a single mum,
don't listen to people who make nasty comments,

=]

 

[luckyme225]

 

[nightkd]

Wow, don't listen. I find it REALLY hard not to take comments to heart, no matter how (sometimes) innocent they are... No matter how minor or idiotic; but it's just not worth it! You know what you want, so do what makes you happy! You sound like a mature, responsible and independent woman, people have this idea in their heads that you NEED a man in order to raise a child 'properly' - which is bullturd... Ignorant people suck.

 

[Sarahkka]

I offer you this old chestnut from the days when we women were pissed enough to burn our bras:
A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.
This fellow needs to get over himself. He seems a little threatened by the fact that you have a solid plan to bear and raise a child by yourself. I think he's more than a little insecure and is projecting that onto you using some of the lowest blows possible (since when has Asperger's been a mental illness? Puh-leeze! He's just showing off his ignorance there!).
Stay strong and true to your plans.
Guys like that just help you get more determined.

 

[beancounter]

I had this off a 'friend' because I am bipolar. I have a OH so it was more about the mental illness. She wasnt nasty, but I was deeply offended- not only is it none of her buisness, but she is an older lady who is schizophrenic. Be apparently it was OK for her to have kids. They are 30 and live at home an one has 2 kids with different women he barely knew so um, I'm not actually interested in her parenting advice you know?? People are always going to disagree with sstuff, particularly parenting, so I guess you have to learn to teflon coat yourself and let the comments slide off!

 

[smartiepants]

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[jackiea85]

Don't listen hun, so many women cope without men, you will be fine! My dad wasn't interested in me so my mum brought me up without him and I think she did a fairly decent job! As for the poster who said children should come from an act of love, how many of us here are accidents??? I know I am and it makes no difference to my life, my mum loved me anyway. This baby is a planned, wanted baby so it is coming from an act of love, just not the traditional route, I don't see why it's a problem??
And also, I was mentally stable when my son was conceived, I now have PND, something that I guess some people would say makes me mentally unstable! Does that mean I should not be looking after my son? There are some very daft people around xx