How are your kid(s) with your pregnancy ?

[nic85]

The reason I ask, is because I'm 36 weeks pregnant, and my 12 year old daughter isn't taking it well.

My husband left us a while back, so it is just me and her in the house.

I first told her I was pregnant when I was 2 months gone, and she didn't take it very well. Tears and all that.

Skip forward to now, and yesterday she told me she's scared when she's around me, in case I go into labour and it's just her around.

I can understand what she means, but no matter what I say she keeps saying she's frightened.

I guess she's been reading a few stories of women who have gone into labour and had to push the baby out in the living room floor, and she's scared that will happen to me and she'll be the only one around.

What can I do ?

P.S. I posted this in the Third Trimester forum too but I'm not sure where it should go. Sorry if I've posted it in the wrong place.

 

[hellohefalump]

sorry, I've never been in that position...

but could you give her a list of phone numbers of people you know who live nearby, so she doesn't feel like she'll be on her own?

 

[LockandKey]

Hello Jumping on over from Baby Club, and while I can honestly say that I've never been in your position, nor do I know what you have or haven't said to her yet, but I figured I could try to help.

-Ask her for help with the name or suggest her writing up a name list
-Let her know when the baby moves so she can feel it too
-Bring her along for baby shopping and ask her opinions on certain colors or patterns
-Bring her along to the appointments so she can see the scan
-If a family member is throwing the baby shower, ask if your daughter can help too
-Have her help decorate the nursery
-Bring her to any baby classes (if you are going to any) so that she may learn how she can help take care of her sibling

Good luck I hope things get better for you

 

[Coxie]

Can you take her to some of your Dr Appointments with you and maybe the Dr can talk to her and let her know that all is okay?

 

[Amarna]

Maybe try to find ways for her to feel involved? Let her help with decorating, getting things set up for the baby, take her to a scan appointment maybe, etc. One thing my parents did for my sister and I when my youngest sister was born was to take us to sibling baby care classes where we learned how to change a diaper, properly hold a baby, etc. It was a great help for us and we felt a lot less anxious afterward. Maybe there's something like that she can go to?

I also agree that giving her a list of phone numbers of maybe neighbors or nearby friends/relatives that she can call just in case might help her feel more at ease.

Good luck and I'm sure she'll come around!

 

[Tilliepink]

I would explain to her what will happen once you go into labour, like who she will stay with who will drive you to the hospital, also give her a list of numbers she can call, and also explain to her that once your are in labour baby still has a while before he/she arrives. Also make her be part of anything baby, of course only stuff she is comfortable with, like baby names, nursery, colors stuff like that. Must be hard for her but I'm sure once baby is here she will feel better about it.

 

[minties]

Tv and movies have a lot to be blamed for - I think kids think that labour is a sudden surprise. Usually the mum on tv suddenly yells "the baby is coming!" and it arrives 3 minutes later.

Maybe you can sit down with her and explain the process, so it's not as frightening for her? And that there is usually time to get to a hospital or call for help.

 

[ilove3baby]

My DD is a lot younger...she is almost four and she is starting to get a little jealous other than that she just wants to be involved with everything!