How did your toddler react to new baby news? (preferably a child under 5, but all w)

[Lues]

Hi guys,

I hope no one finds this post annoying, since it's sort of for "market research" in a sense. But I thought it might also be a fun post for people to share their stories and read others.

I'm a writer and I'm writing a children's book about a small child finding out their Mom is pregnant.

I'd love to hear stories of how they reacted, both at first, and if their reactions changed along the way.

Were there any surprising questions they asked or comments they made along the way?

Was there a point along the way where you feel like they "got" it?

This is my first, so I'll be doing that part of the story based off of other people's input. Thanks in advance!

 

[AndreZZ]

My 4.5 year old is really excited about having a new baby in the house (he loves his baby sister who is currently 11 months). I think his reaction once the baby is born will be as enthusiastic, he has adored his sister ever since she was born.

My other two younger ones (2.5 and 11 months) don t understand the concept of course.

From my experience the 3-4 year range is when toddlers get excited for a baby I think. Hope that's somewhat helpful.

 

[minties]

Neither of mine gave any particular reaction, just an "oh yeah?" type thing. My 5 year old asks if the baby is ready to come yet, and what it's first words will be, but my 3 year old only mentions it if I do.

 

[eve21]

When i told my 3.5 year old daughter she was happy for about a minute then just watched the telly as normal.

After a few hours she began asking questions, where is the baby, how did it get in my belly, is it a girl?

Now shes excited about going shopping for it & says she wants to change the babys nappy & buy tiny clothes for it because she is the big sister lol.

 

[laughingduck]

I sat my 4 year old daughter on my lap and my partner video taped it. I said we have something to tell you, Mommy has a baby in her belly. She smiled and said "You do? Really? For real?" She patted my belly and looked at it smiling, and she asked some questions about if it was a boy or a girl, when it will come out etc. She also wanted to know how it got there (in soke detail) lol. Now she tells anyone (from family to teachers to random people at the store) that I have a baby in my belly lol. She is quite happy!

 

[JJay]

My 4 year old reacted by saying 'look what I can do with my straw mummy' (she had a drink at the time) - not the reaction I was expecting! Now she's thought about it more she asks questions all the time and is excited. She wants the baby to be a girl called Rose or Rosa (her name is Rosie). She keeps asking to practice with nappies so she can change the baby.

My 2 (almost 3) year old didn't have any reaction at first either just ran straight back off to play. He has since asked a lot of random questions 'can we put the new baby in the river?' (Worrying!?!) 'how will the baby get out of your tummy?' 'Can I hold the new baby' 'will the doctor cut your tummy?' 'Will the doctor cut your boobies?!' 'Can I have some of the babies special milk?!' I'm a little worried he might be a bit jealous when the baby arrives as he is a mummies boy.

 

[jenmcn1]

I'm expecting my 4th baby. I have a 6yr old son, 3 yr old daughter and 20 month old. When we told them, they were SOOOOO excited!! My kids love babies, the discussion now is whether it's a boy or girl baby. My son says if it's a boy, than its his baby, and if it's a girl my daughter says it's her baby lol! At hey are already trying to pick names. My daughter says she wants to name the baby 'elsa'...surprise surprise with her obsession with the movie Frozen. Lol!
They will do great with the baby, it's my youngest that I'm worried about as he's SO attached and such a mamas boy.
Ultimately my kids are very welcoming and don't get jealous easily. They adjust well, and are incredibly excited for a new baby....they can't wait!

 

[Lief]

DS is 3.5 he'll be 4 when baby is born, when we told him he got really excited. He has insisted that he's getting a brother and wouldn't even entertain the notion that it could be a girl. Lately though when talking about the baby he has said brother or sister, so he's coming around.

 

[MummyMana]

Imogen is turning 3 soon.

She keeps saying "baby will play my toys in living room. Baby will say 'waa waa'" She keeps asking to see the baby and trying to look through my bellybutton. She made a card for the baby and posted it down my top! She also says she wants to kiss the baby and gives my tummy kisses. She keeps changing her mind as to what she thinks the gender is. Once she pointed to my tummy and said "that's my brother in there" but she also says "my am having a sister" She keeps asking when we can get the baby out haha

 

[Marumi]

My son had just turned 4 when I had a positive pregnancy test. I had an early miscarriage before this one which he witnessed because I began bleeding while changing. Sounds like a horror scenario but he reacted surprisingly well, trying to make me feel better. He was positive about the baby before but probably not fully understanding and kept asking if we are getting a new baby. The new baby happened barely a week after I stopped bleeding from the miscarriage. I dealt with bleeding from a hematoma early on so I had to rest lots (partial bedrest) He figured that I have to rest so I don't bleed and lose the baby again. He was happy the baby was "back", when I used the bathroom he often askd me if I was bleeding and offered me pads.
I took him to appointments and he liked seeing the baby on ultrasound and being a part of it. At first he wa a bit jealous also saying that the baby can't drink his milkies or have any of his toys. He tried to tell me the baby needs to eat soup
The more my belly grew the more attached he became. When we found out the sex he said it was a boy beforehand. He wanted a little brother so he can play soccer with him or take him to Kindergarten so his friends can see him.
His jealousy really vanished by the second trimester. He heard the baby's name once and remembered and started caling him "Trystan" on his own. He also said he loves the baby and "that is my brother", he kisses and rubs my belly...surprisingly because we never asked him to or tried to enforce bonding during pregnancy. I wanted to give him all the time he needs. He is already looking forward to a family of four.
I have been dealing with a kidney and pelvic infection for a month that won't respond to antibiotics an of course feared pre term labor. I have been in and out of the hospital and have to be on bedrest almost constantly. So again my toddler sees me resting because of the baby. He asked if the baby is pushing me. He is still very positive about it all but I wish he could witness and easier pregnancy. It is crazy because I am very healthy and feel great aside from the infection. But these things I could not control and my infection only got to this point thanks to negligent doctors. If I had money I would sew people I think.

 

[Lues]

Wow! What great stories and what neat kids!

Thank you guys so much. It's amazing all the different reactions and how adjustable and loving children naturally are sometimes.

 

[Itsychik]

I'm on baby #3 right now. My DS had just turned 2 when we found out we were pregnant with his sister, but he didn't understand the concept at all. We took him with us to the 20-week ultrasound and also to our 3D ultrasound, but he was largely uninterested (we kept pointing out things about the baby and he'd look at the screen, then try to play with something else). When he was just over 2.5 years old (and I was 7+ months pregnant) the belly was a very "visible" reminder that we were having a baby and we could ask him, "where's the baby?" and he'd point to my bump but that was about it.

When he met his sister for the first time he was not jealous at all like we expected, and he talked about the baby a lot "the baby is sleeping" "the baby is crying" "Mama, the baby is hungry" although it took him a little while to get used to using her name ("Juliet") he referred to her as "baby Juliet" until she was almost a year old.

We're now expecting #3. DS was 4 years 3 months old when we told him we're having another baby. We've been asking him for about a year though whether he wanted another baby, whether he wanted another brother or sister (he insists he wants another sister). He didn't have too much of a reaction to the news (as in, wasn't excited or upset either way) but did ask some questions like other PP's have said, like "where is the baby" "when is the baby coming?". My DD is nearly 23 months old and she doesn't understand yet. Sometimes she'll point to my bump and I'll say, "that's the baby" but if I ask her 10 minutes later where the baby is, she'll just shrug (she doesn't talk yet).

DS is much more into the baby this time around though (he calls it "your baby." Like, "Mama, how is your baby doing?" "When is your baby coming out of your belly?"). Last week he asked me if the baby could sleep in his room, and I explained that the baby would be in our room because babies cry and get hungry at night so I need to feed it, and he said, "but that's MY job!" He has also been telling his friends and teachers at school (he's in kindergarten) and has also told them that the baby makes mama throw up a lot.

I know it varies per child, as we have friends whose children at 2 or 3 years old were way more interested in the pregnancy. But now that my DS is older he's way more involved than he was the last time. I'm really curious how he adjusts once the new baby is here!

 

[MummyMana]

Imogen is awake after being poorly and she's been chatting to the baby:

"my be sick, my have a shower! You can have a shower too baby... You be born, you can be sick too!"