How do I support my friend?

[fruity]

My best friend has just been told today that the two embryo's she had implanted have not taken. This was her 1st attempt at IVF. They are both devastated. I just wondered if anyone had any poems or words of wisdom I can share with her? It is so hard to know what to say other than I love her and wish things were different for them.

It is hard to know what to do as I know she finds it hard that I have a baby. She can't bear to be with any friends when the kids are there as it is too upsetting. I would love to send a poem but don't want to upset her more.

Any ideas?

 

[Springflower]

Hi Fruity

Didn't want to read and run. I'm afraid I don't know any poems or have any nice words to pass on. I know though that she will be grateful that you're supporting her. It's gutting when it doesn't work out.

 

[fruity]

I feel so sick for her. They will be amazing parents. They have been trying for so long. It's heartbreaking.

 

[fluffystar]

I think its lovely that you are being so considerate about how best to support your friend.

I dont think there is too much that you can say but just be there for her and let her let off steam if she needs. I cant speak from exerience but can only imagine that time may make things easier, though in reality the only thing that will truly make her feel better is getting that BFP xx

 

[sparkle83]

A simple card with 'I love you and am here for you if you want me at any time. If not, that's ok too. I'm thinking of you' would do it for me

 

[Chesca]

Hiya fruity,

It's so hard to know what to say when this happens but i'm sure she will know you are there for her!

There is a churchill quote I read when I have shite days and really helps to pull through,
”never give in, never, never, never, never, never give in, except when reason tells you to”.

Sorry I don't have any others for you!

xxx

 

[fruity]

Thanks so much girls. I haven't actually spoken to her because I know I will cry and she doesn't need that and thought of sending flowers but am scared that would be OTT. I think a card is a great idea.
Thank you!

 

[norah s]

Fruity, i dont have any words of wisdom but this is a short poem for you called:-

Friends
by Emily Dickinson

They might not need me; but they might.
I'll let my head be just in sight;
A smile as small as mine might be
Precisely their necessity.


I'm sure she appreciates your friendship and support. You seem like a very caring friend x

 

[rachelle1975]

That's such a lovely thought. Just knowing a friend loves & supports you is a wonderful feeling. I've just been through this & my best friend was great... No questions just hugs & chocolate. Let her know if she wants to talk that you're there but don't ask too many questions unless she oks it... Worst thing was being asked why 'I failed'

 

[Blue12]

I had a couple people send me flowers and it was beyond wonderful. That is very thoughtful of you.

I hated that someone said to me "don't get upset you just try again - for most people it doesn't work the first time anyway".