How would you answer?

[vineyard]

My best friend asked me today, "How did you know that you wanted kids?" She's not sure if she wants them or not and is trying to "figure" it out. I had a hard time answering this question. The desire is just in me. I can't imagine my life without them!!

How would you answer this question?

 

[Nathyrra]

I think.. you just know..

If she's wondering if she does or doesn't then chances are right now she doesn't. I remember a few years back being quite indifferent to children and wondered myself if I'd have any. Then oneday it was like a switch, just woke up one day and REALLY wanted children.

I'd probably answer it with something of the above, sometimes you always have it, sometimes it comes with time, and sometimes the desire never comes. Everyone is different I suppose!

 

[latestarter]

Tough question...

I'm not sure what I'd say, except maybe that when you are ready... you just know it.

I spent time in my late 20's and early 30's not sure. Then in my mid 30's I was certain. It developed over time. But I never really spent time trying to figure it out. Its just there.

But that feeling is hard to explain to someone who isn't there yet. Doesn't mean they won't be, just that they are not right now.

 

[maz]

When I was growing up, I never wanted children. When all the other girls in my class at school were babysitting for pocket money, I'd be studying (sad I know), but I wasn't one bit interested. Even until my mid to late 20s I wasn't interested. I never held babies, I never spoke to children, I just wasn't interested. Then over time I found myself noticing babies more, gazing admiringly at pregnant ladies, and then I realised that I actually wanted children of my own. It was as if somebody had turned on a valve, but only opened it a little bit, so that my longing for children crept up on me slowly.

I think the answer to your question is that intuition takes over - you just know. She may not be ready now, or she may be in the in-betweeny stage that I went through about 5 years ago.

I hope that makes sense.

xx

 

[Omi]

I ditto the above posts.. i think you just know..ive always know since i was a little girl that i wanted to be a mummy one day.

Or, for others its a gradual thing..possibly based on maturing, getting to a particular stage in life- and indeed meeting the right partner can also trigger the desire to have children. It just depends on the individual, i guess...

 

[vineyard]

Those are all great answers!

 

[CareBear]

I never wanted children until I met my DH and even then I wanted to achieve something in my career for me before we started trying so I can say that like the others the real feeling of wanting a baby crept up on me to. Now of course I wish I hadn't waited!

 

[maz]

Now of course I wish I hadn't waited!

I second that... If only I'd accidentally fallen pregnant shortly after my DH and I moved into our home ... the child would be 5 now. Instead we got a dog who is now 6. I suppose I could always dress him in a school uniform and sit him at the table to do his homework ...

 

[Farie]

I just knew .. I'd been with DF for about 6 months and knew he was the person I wanted kids with ... we started TTC about 8 months after that.

There was no 'concious' switch .. it just dawned on me that I wanted his children ... I'd always known I wanted kids .. children .. eventually, after 6 months with him I knew he was the one and I wanted kids ASAP.

 

[Catalyst]

I think.. you just know..

If she's wondering if she does or doesn't then chances are right now she doesn't. I remember a few years back being quite indifferent to children and wondered myself if I'd have any. Then oneday it was like a switch, just woke up one day and REALLY wanted children.

I'd probably answer it with something of the above, sometimes you always have it, sometimes it comes with time, and sometimes the desire never comes. Everyone is different I suppose!

hehe that thing about the feeling never coming.
My motherinlaw never wanted kids. Then she got pg, and after that she had 3 more She does not regret it.
Then many years ago there was an interview in the telly with old woman who had 18 kids! yes 18!! And the person intervewing her sayd "you must have been a lot in to kids since you have so many" and she answered "no, not realy, never liked them very mutch" hehe

 

[DaisyDuke]

I would ask her if she was told tomorrow she cant have children, how would she feel? I think that would answer her question

 

[Catalyst]

My best friend asked me today, "How did you know that you wanted kids?" She's not sure if she wants them or not and is trying to "figure" it out. I had a hard time answering this question. The desire is just in me. I can't imagine my life without them!!

How would you answer this question?

Im not sure how to answer.
I have very good family, good OH who I love very mutch. I just felt like this was something I wanted to do. I thought I wanted to create, love and race a child with this man. I melted around litle babys, small kids and so on. When I was 16 I felt like never having kids. Around 20 I started to want to but was ok with waiting because my OH was not ready.
I just think family life is my way in life. Im not the career type, not mutch of a traveller though I like going abroad. Feels like this is what im ment to do.

I havent asked my OH how he knew he was ready. He just sayd one day, ok lets start trying. And how he is around kids is mutch different these days then when before he felt ready. Now he thinks they are so cute and adorable but before just boring hehehe.