I just cannot bare this

[NikiJJones]

I am feeling so low. My SIL and brother are expecting a baby in the same week my LO would have been due. I knew they were trying and have been worrying about it. They told my parents yesterday, and my Mum specifically asked them not to break it to me, and to let her (my Mum) tell me when the time was right to soften the blow. My Mum and I had discussed this and agreed it would be the least painful way for me to hear.
So my SIL proved what a truely evil cow she is by ringing me up late last night: my wedding anniversary and also the 2 month anniversary of my MC (she knew both these things) and told me, in a particularly gloating manner. Even down to telling me that our babies must have been conceived at the same time.
I just feel so cut up about it. It caused me to row with my Mum last night (we've now cleared it up) and with my DH and with my brother. Inside I feel like I am dying. Why has god chosen to give her this child (She already has three and leads such an unhealthy careless lifestyle) when he took mine away? I cannot bear that she will give birth to my parents' first grandchild and my grandparents first greatgrandchild, and all this just at the same time as I should have been having my baby. And why did she have to be so cruel about breaking it to me?

 

[miel]

oh i am so so sorry sweetheart...

 

[Samo]

i am so sorry. that was very careless and insensitive of her, i think she was just overexcited and not mindlessly not thinking about your feelings.

 

[Mynxie]

so sorry to read this. That's just bitchy of your SIL.

 

[todteach]

I'm so terribly sorry hun. I don't understand it all either. You're right, it isn't fair. I'm now crying after reading your post.

If I could reach over and give you a great big hug, you know I would.

Did your sil not understand that your mom had already spoken to you, or was she just trying to be a b**ch? I don't understand people like that, and guess I never will. Please avoid her calls, if she's going to be like that. That's what I've had to do with some of our "friends".

Huge hun.

Take care of yourself.
pm me if you'd like to vent

 

[tansey]

Sorry you have to go through this hun. She must be jealous of you or something - i bet you are much prettier, nicer, have loads of friends and are liked by everyone and she is not or is she just EVIL?
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[babezone]

im sorry to hear that hun...i think thats very selfish xxx

 

[faith_may]

I'm so sorry

 

[leedsforever]

so sorry hun

 

[porkpie1981]

 

[shmoo75]

Oh Nicky hun I am so sorry your SIL is being such an evil bitch. She obviously thinks only of herself and not of anyone else I pity the poor child she is carrying and her other children. What did your brother say when you spoke to him? I would of told him in no uncertain terms exactly what I thought of her phone call and the manner in which she spoke to you. All I can do is send and let you know I am here if you need to rant.

 

[Suzanne]

Im sorry your having to go through this hun, as if it wasnt bad enough losing your LO you now have to deal with her gloating! I dont know what to say to you hun except please know im thinking of you!

 

[NikiJJones]

Thanks ladies.
I have had a rotten few days, and you are all a tower of strength for me.
Well to update. My brother is just being abusive to me, and telling me that I am immature and mentally ill and do not deserve to be a mother. I know that these words have come from her, as he is so under her thumb, and would not have said stuff like that before he met her.
My poor parents are stuck in the middle. I wish they could just stand up for me and tell her how awful she has been, but I know they are afraid of losing my brother if they do that, as she is so manipulative.
My DH is cross with my family as he thinks they are all being manipulated by her.
And in the meantime I still feel so, so sad. It is not purely the fact that she is PG and I am not, it is mainly due to the way she dealt with it, and the nasty way she told me. I feel really humiliated, and such a failure.
And in answer to one of your posts: yes: I am way prettier than her and way more intelligent. She weighs about 3 times what I weigh (no exaggeration), and she met my brother online, as they were both so desperate for a partner, as no-one else would have either of them. They hardly have any friends. Only two couples of friends came to their wedding. She has no education and has never had a job. She claims mega benefits, and sits around all day getting fatter while my brother works to support her and her kids!!!! Sorry: I sound like such a bitch, but it does help to realise how much better than her I am. So yes: in answer to your post: I am sure she is jealous of me for many things. There are so many hurtful things I could say to her face, but I just would not, as I am not like that.
Thanks so much for letting me have a rant, and for all your kind words.
I know that after all the upset, this will not be my month for another BFP. I have had mega cramping and pelvic pain ever since Friday and have hardly slept. I just need to find the strength to move forward now, and I know I can do it with all the kindness of you lovely ladies at B&B.
Hugs to all of you!!!!!

 

[tansey]

You sound better today - stronger. Good for you for looking for the positives and for being so much better than her. Your brother probably needs your parents support because of this 'bitch' but it must be soooo hard for you to not disown the lot of them!

I hope you have a sticky bean soon!

 

[todteach]

I wish we could do more for you hun. Stay strong. Remember that you are the better person here. She is all those things that you are telling us. Boy, do I wish that we could help you tell her off (politely )

 

[Logiebear]

You are truely such a strong lady, like so many others who have been through this kind of trauma, your SIL is a bitch and you should point out to her that you know she is claiming benefits while your brother is working!!! There only so many benefits you can claim while working and mega doesn't come into it lol.

I am sure you will get your sticky bean soon and then you can stick one finger up at her!!!