just a vent cos im so angry!

[jo_79]

ok so i went to the crematorium yesterday to put a little christmas tree on my daughters grave. now where i live at the crem they have a baby memorial garden where my daughters ashes are buried, they dont allow headstones or anything and there is about 10 babies in each row so when the grass grows back its difficult to distinguish which grave is yours; so due to this most parents put little plaques and flower pots and other stuff for their babies on top of the little grave.

i put a plaque with a special poem and a pot of flowers with toys around it, i dont go so often now but go when i feel i need to.

now when i went yesterday there was nothing on my little girls grave nor on the bottom half of her row or the row next to hers - which is also where my best mates babe is buried, i burst into tears! i found it all dumped over by the memorial wall.

how f*cking disrespectful is that!!!!!

i understand they may need to move things but surely they would put it back? obviously not. ive been sitting brooding over it since yesterday morning. it happened once before and i called the crem to complain and he said sometimes we need to move things - fair enough but i think this time its gone too far - i mean imagine removing everything off them all! i dont think they would go to a "proper" grave and take everything off. sometimes their attitude is that they're not as important as the bigger graves, just because these are babies it doesnt mean they are any less important, if anything it should be more important.

i am going back on monday as it is hollies anniversary, i did put my stuff back on her grave yesterday so if it has been removed by monday then someone at the crematorium will have to bear the brunt of my anger!

im really sorry for going on but im just typing my little rant out. do you think a strongly worded letter is called for or not?? im thinking now about printing a note off the computer and getting it laminated to put on her grave saying "if you do have to move my daughters things from this grave please have some respect and put it back!"
to everyone in this section at this time of year x

off for more chocolate now to cheer me up

 

[LoraLoo]

Definately complain and write a letter thats disgusting! I can understand that they may need to move things from time to time but they should at least have the respect and decency to put it back. If anyone moved anything from Eve's grave i would hit the roof. Im so sorry they have upset you hun xxxxx

 

[FEDup1981]

im sorry hun, hope things are left where they should be xx

 

[Pyrrhic]

I would write a letter to your local paper personally.

 

[oxSarahxo]

I would write a letter to your local paper personally.

I would have done exactly the same thing.

If anything else was to happen like that to jessicas grave (as it has recently) I was going to take it to the papers again, as her story was published in them anyway.

I think you should write a letter to the crem too and even the local council.

 

[haaza123]

That really annoys me, some people have NO RESPECT!!

 

[Drazic<3]

Thats awful, im so sorry they have upset you.
A letter to the council and the crem is so deserved. It might be worth getting your local MP involved too?
x

 

[JASMAK]

So sorry hon.

 

[honeybunch2k7]

OMG! How insensitive!!! I think you handled it well cuz lemme tell you I would've went OFF on them.

I think the note is a great idea as well as the laminated note. Did you speak with the person in charge of the crematorium??? I think you should do whatever you feel you need to do to make sure that doesn't happen again. Maybe a petition would help as well.

 

[jo_79]

Thanks for all your replies.
I went again today as its hollie's 3rd anniversary and there is a big sign there saying that flowers are welcome but all memorials, toys, plaques etc will be moved from the grass to the memorial wall, they can move hollies stuff as much as they like but everytime i will return it. Apparantly the reasoning is they need to get to the grass and also the grass needs to be used! AS BLOODY WHAT!!! I dont think people will be too impressed if they clear it and see people trampling all across the area. They see it as a patch of grass but everyone who goes there has a precious baby buried under it and it means something to them. Also because people take such pride in it it always looks so nice there, especially in the summer.

I text my mate today to tell her (her baby is buried in the row next to hollie) and she wants to start a petition. When my heads back to being my own i am going to write a shitty and firm letter to the crematorium, the council and the local paper so everyone knows how disrespectful this is.

Everytime i go up there i never ever see anyone there working, today there was a couple of people about but there was also a funeral just about to start so even though i was about to explode with anger at the sign it just wasnt right to kick off infront of people who were mourning at a funeral!

 

[todteach]