AngelzEye
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Woo, a bit late but I've been busy =P And after breaking my laptop a couple of months ago I don't get much internet time 
Amber is perfect & beautiful but I must say labour wasn't so great. I wouldn't read it if your baby is back to back & your a worrier lol, as its a little gloomy, but don't want to lie & pretend it 'didn't feel that bad' or that I've 'forgotten the pain' etc.
It started off perfectly fine though, I woke up to a completely soaken bed at about 7am, still having not packed my bag... Rang partner & delivery suite, they said to come in at 9 to get checked. Well I immediately started having period cramps (basically) & had a 'great' time running up and down stairs to get things for my bag haha.
Around half 9 I decided I should head for the hospital, but my body said otherwise, an had 'clear out' time so I really didn't think I was going to get out of the bathroom for long enough to call a taxi. By this point I wasn't feeling too hot anymore & started going "ow ow ow" when I got a contraction... but alone in the house I was allowed
The taxi came, and of course to save face I had to shut up & hold a normal conversation with the driver. May I say, pleasantly talking through contractions at the traffic lights is in no way an enjoyable situation. And the rude ******* didn't give me all my change, blatantly figuring I 'wouldn't notice'.
Went to get examined in the hospital & I told the midwife I felt sick. So she very slowly makes her way out the room to find a sick bowl. She wasn't back for at least 5 minutes by which time I had covered the entire examination room in vomit
I really wasn't thinking about being embarassed by this point - and there was nothing I could have done about it lol.
They found I was 5cm and I was sent to a LDRP room (where I continued to throw up some more.)
Still apart from feeling so ill, this was still fairly pleasant in comparison to how it got.
My partner turned up about half 11 & within another hour of pacing the room with crappy contractions it was starting to really hurt, and I was getting a 'bit' noisy. And pretty pissed off by the descriptions of minute long contractions followed by a few minutes break because as far as I was concerned if there were breaks, they weren't substantial. I asked for the epidural about half 12, and was told they were busy in theatre =/ (damn)
So I got some diamorphine and apparently also antisickness drugs to help until they were free (I can't actually remember that bit very well because I was pretty much focused on the very vocal 'ouching'.
For the hour that it actually worked, the diamorphine was amazing! I felt so happy & although I could feel contractions they didn't hurt in the slightest. Annoyingly, it wore off. I asked for some more, but apparently they ration this stuff & I refused gas and air because it makes me feel stoned, panicked & more sick. Now my backache was getting really bad so it felt like there was no break in the contractions & I spent basically the next hour in a lot of pain making a lot of funny sounds & thrashing around. Eventually after 3pm I got the epidural... which when it kicked in was okay. It didn't block out everything to be honest, but it seriously helped. I could still move everything & feel everything but the pain was muted. Getting the epidural in didn't hurt at all or feel horrible and took only a few minutes. Only trying to sit still through the contractions was bad.
Of course, it was a great but futile relief as within the hour I was fully dilated (hmmm...) & I thought yay, pushing time. But no, I was told to wait a few hours - for no reason. What I did notice was the pain getting worse, contractions coming back but they were nothing in comparison with the constant backache which was unbearable. And my epidural top up button had stopped working. The midwives omitted to tell me that they were waiting for the epidural to wear off. It got absolutely terrible, and I was screaming & writhing around so much I didn't even realise I was pulling all my drips out & until my partner noticed the tubes had all gone red because I was bleeding up them.
After much yelling that it hurt too much in my back for everything to be okay, I eventually got out of one of the midwives 'theres nothing we can do about it, its the way your babies lying.' Which was the first hint that I had a back to back baby. I have no words to describe how much it actually hurt gah. They didn't tell me anything, just talked about it amongst themselves like I wasn't there. Thankfully, during my writhing around I flipped myself onto the front & pulled the epidural line, so the anaesthesist had to come back, and he gave me a little bit more epidural medicine, which helped a bit.
The midwifes then left (a bit weird, I'd been fully dilated for over 2 hours now) and I was so confused, I had no idea why this didn't seem to be anything like the descriptions. Having stopped some of the pain I realised that there was a lot of pressure around my pelvis area, and (naughtily) investigated. What must of only been 2 inches inside I could feel the babies head, so I thought I'd just start pushing because I was desperate for it to be over.
5 minutes later, I'd managed to get the midwives back who said 'stop pushing'. Fat chance of that, so I just kept going, then one of them said "well if your going to push, push with contractions" which was a bit pointless seeings as I couldn't feel any contractions anymore, just one massively intense back & pelvis ache. After another 5 minutes of pushing I stopped as the baby was crowning & they pulled out some scissors. At this point I truly didn't care what happened as long as it was over very quickly. After the cut, Amber was born in two pushes, one for the head, and one for the body
I don't really remember much of that to be honest, but my partner fills me in whenever I ask a question. I certainly don't remember the placenta part.
After about an hour which I mainly spent in a daze, they came back in to sew me back up. This time they convinced me to use the gas and air (well, who wants to feel someone sewing you down there =/.) After a long time, the midwife called another one in & they started discussing how it was wonky, didn't look right & needed to be done again. And started discussing how they would do this... It was exactly what you don't want to hear when someones sewing up your privates lmao... but due to the gas and air I got over it, and it seems fine now btw ladies. Still it took them an hour and a half.
I am very thankful that Amber was healthy & there were no complications but I am slightly sad about how painful & distressing I found it. Particularly as I had & did everything I could to prevent it from being so. I shudder to think what nature might have intended. Also I felt completely in the dark and unable to ask any questions and get intelligent answers, apart from "not now", "still a few hours", "you can't", "calm down" etc etc. As happy go lucky as it may seem, it was horrible & I cannot even slightly comprehend going through it again. I also feel really disappointed because it seemed to start out so well & I was coping, then it went to the complete other end of the spectrum
I don't know why I feel disappointed in myself when I have my gorgeous baby & I feel so jealous of anyone who managed to enjoy or at least cope with their own labour , I wonder if anyone else has felt the same way for no apparent reason or if I'm just going mad. I wasn't scared beforehand but now I can't hear screaming (of any sort) on tv/movies without cringing & the idea of reading or watching things about childbirth or labour (like I did constantly when pregnant) makes me want to cry.
Amber is perfect & beautiful but I must say labour wasn't so great. I wouldn't read it if your baby is back to back & your a worrier lol, as its a little gloomy, but don't want to lie & pretend it 'didn't feel that bad' or that I've 'forgotten the pain' etc.
It started off perfectly fine though, I woke up to a completely soaken bed at about 7am, still having not packed my bag... Rang partner & delivery suite, they said to come in at 9 to get checked. Well I immediately started having period cramps (basically) & had a 'great' time running up and down stairs to get things for my bag haha.
Around half 9 I decided I should head for the hospital, but my body said otherwise, an had 'clear out' time so I really didn't think I was going to get out of the bathroom for long enough to call a taxi. By this point I wasn't feeling too hot anymore & started going "ow ow ow" when I got a contraction... but alone in the house I was allowed
The taxi came, and of course to save face I had to shut up & hold a normal conversation with the driver. May I say, pleasantly talking through contractions at the traffic lights is in no way an enjoyable situation. And the rude ******* didn't give me all my change, blatantly figuring I 'wouldn't notice'.
Went to get examined in the hospital & I told the midwife I felt sick. So she very slowly makes her way out the room to find a sick bowl. She wasn't back for at least 5 minutes by which time I had covered the entire examination room in vomit
I really wasn't thinking about being embarassed by this point - and there was nothing I could have done about it lol.They found I was 5cm and I was sent to a LDRP room (where I continued to throw up some more.)
Still apart from feeling so ill, this was still fairly pleasant in comparison to how it got.
My partner turned up about half 11 & within another hour of pacing the room with crappy contractions it was starting to really hurt, and I was getting a 'bit' noisy. And pretty pissed off by the descriptions of minute long contractions followed by a few minutes break because as far as I was concerned if there were breaks, they weren't substantial. I asked for the epidural about half 12, and was told they were busy in theatre =/ (damn)
So I got some diamorphine and apparently also antisickness drugs to help until they were free (I can't actually remember that bit very well because I was pretty much focused on the very vocal 'ouching'.
For the hour that it actually worked, the diamorphine was amazing! I felt so happy & although I could feel contractions they didn't hurt in the slightest. Annoyingly, it wore off. I asked for some more, but apparently they ration this stuff & I refused gas and air because it makes me feel stoned, panicked & more sick. Now my backache was getting really bad so it felt like there was no break in the contractions & I spent basically the next hour in a lot of pain making a lot of funny sounds & thrashing around. Eventually after 3pm I got the epidural... which when it kicked in was okay. It didn't block out everything to be honest, but it seriously helped. I could still move everything & feel everything but the pain was muted. Getting the epidural in didn't hurt at all or feel horrible and took only a few minutes. Only trying to sit still through the contractions was bad.
Of course, it was a great but futile relief as within the hour I was fully dilated (hmmm...) & I thought yay, pushing time. But no, I was told to wait a few hours - for no reason. What I did notice was the pain getting worse, contractions coming back but they were nothing in comparison with the constant backache which was unbearable. And my epidural top up button had stopped working. The midwives omitted to tell me that they were waiting for the epidural to wear off. It got absolutely terrible, and I was screaming & writhing around so much I didn't even realise I was pulling all my drips out & until my partner noticed the tubes had all gone red because I was bleeding up them.
After much yelling that it hurt too much in my back for everything to be okay, I eventually got out of one of the midwives 'theres nothing we can do about it, its the way your babies lying.' Which was the first hint that I had a back to back baby. I have no words to describe how much it actually hurt gah. They didn't tell me anything, just talked about it amongst themselves like I wasn't there. Thankfully, during my writhing around I flipped myself onto the front & pulled the epidural line, so the anaesthesist had to come back, and he gave me a little bit more epidural medicine, which helped a bit.
The midwifes then left (a bit weird, I'd been fully dilated for over 2 hours now) and I was so confused, I had no idea why this didn't seem to be anything like the descriptions. Having stopped some of the pain I realised that there was a lot of pressure around my pelvis area, and (naughtily) investigated. What must of only been 2 inches inside I could feel the babies head, so I thought I'd just start pushing because I was desperate for it to be over.
5 minutes later, I'd managed to get the midwives back who said 'stop pushing'. Fat chance of that, so I just kept going, then one of them said "well if your going to push, push with contractions" which was a bit pointless seeings as I couldn't feel any contractions anymore, just one massively intense back & pelvis ache. After another 5 minutes of pushing I stopped as the baby was crowning & they pulled out some scissors. At this point I truly didn't care what happened as long as it was over very quickly. After the cut, Amber was born in two pushes, one for the head, and one for the body
I don't really remember much of that to be honest, but my partner fills me in whenever I ask a question. I certainly don't remember the placenta part.
After about an hour which I mainly spent in a daze, they came back in to sew me back up. This time they convinced me to use the gas and air (well, who wants to feel someone sewing you down there =/.) After a long time, the midwife called another one in & they started discussing how it was wonky, didn't look right & needed to be done again. And started discussing how they would do this... It was exactly what you don't want to hear when someones sewing up your privates lmao... but due to the gas and air I got over it, and it seems fine now btw ladies. Still it took them an hour and a half.
I am very thankful that Amber was healthy & there were no complications but I am slightly sad about how painful & distressing I found it. Particularly as I had & did everything I could to prevent it from being so. I shudder to think what nature might have intended. Also I felt completely in the dark and unable to ask any questions and get intelligent answers, apart from "not now", "still a few hours", "you can't", "calm down" etc etc. As happy go lucky as it may seem, it was horrible & I cannot even slightly comprehend going through it again. I also feel really disappointed because it seemed to start out so well & I was coping, then it went to the complete other end of the spectrum
I don't know why I feel disappointed in myself when I have my gorgeous baby & I feel so jealous of anyone who managed to enjoy or at least cope with their own labour , I wonder if anyone else has felt the same way for no apparent reason or if I'm just going mad. I wasn't scared beforehand but now I can't hear screaming (of any sort) on tv/movies without cringing & the idea of reading or watching things about childbirth or labour (like I did constantly when pregnant) makes me want to cry.
I wonder what their reasoning was for buggering off and leaving you for so long at 10cm!
