Lost my Sex Drive Completely!!

[dancingleigh3]

Hi,

I have been TTC for 8 months now and I have totally lsot my sex drive. Is there anything I can do/take to get it back. It is quite difficult as we are trying for a baby and I really don't feel like it at all!!!

Thanks X

 

[Kiki09]

Its probably down to the stress of "having to bd" at certain times rather than as before when it was because you wanted to, if you know what I mean!

I do go through phases like this and its hard because you have the pressure of knowing that if you dont make the effort then you miss another month, try and not let it get to be all about making a baby, subconsciously try and switch off from it when you want to bd, remember what it was like before TTC, make an eve of it, plan a bit of romance... or fun together... try and think back to what it was like when you first met, when it was purely about the BD-ing for no other reason but because you wanted each other!

 

[dancingleigh3]

Its probably down to the stress of "having to bd" at certain times rather than as before when it was because you wanted to, if you know what I mean!

I do go through phases like this and its hard because you have the pressure of knowing that if you dont make the effort then you miss another month, try and not let it get to be all about making a baby, subconsciously try and switch off from it when you want to bd, remember what it was like before TTC, make an eve of it, plan a bit of romance... or fun together... try and think back to what it was like when you first met, when it was purely about the BD-ing for no other reason but because you wanted each other!

Thanks, it is very difficult an pressured as it has to be done at certain times! I have totally gone off BD'ing at the moment. Maybe we do need to try a different approach so that it doesn't feel like a chore!!

 

[chanel]

I think waiting until bed time definitely makes it a chore, especially when you have had a hard day and are tired but the OPK is saying you must DTD... i know where you are coming from so am looking forward to seeing some good suggestions

 

[Mrs G]

We def had a phase like this, I agree with chanel about not waiting til bed time. Try and do the things you used to before ttc. Maybe get yourself down Ann Summers, just avoid the lube!!

xx

 

[lioness168]

I totally understand where you are coming from...and this adds to the pressure and stress of ttc as well. I don't have any answers but I will be closely monitoring this post for some answers myself. I guess for me, if this cycle doesn't work we are onto IVF anyway...so we wont have to worry about the pressures of timed bding for awhile - thank God!

 

[xkissyx]

i am also going through the motions of being fed up of BDing i feel atm like questionin if all the stress is worth it but thats a moment of insanity. 8 months of trying and fustration with each other and doctors and tests its no wonder DB is feeling all this. we simply sat down and talked to each other about anything that didn't include baby making and sure enough we both felt better xx

 

[dancingleigh3]

Thanks for your answers everyone, I definitely think not waiting until bedtime is a good option. Going to try and pounce on my other half unexpectedly in the kitchen at tea-time!!! LOL!!! xx

 

[Sambatiki]

Hi there!

I know exactly what you mean! Although I have found the more we dtd the more I get into it iygwim. I try not to 'plan' it or tell DF that we are going to be having on x day..... I dont know about anyone else.... but since TTC foreplay has taken a bit of a back seat! This cycle we have made sure we have more of a play beforehand. You could always try and do just foreplay during the early cycle days... NO SEX... then hopefully by the 'crucial' days you'll be GAGGING for it!

Not sure if any of the above makes any sense! hth xxx

Good luck!