my heart just cracked in a billion pieces...worse than a physical wound

[Danie1stbaby]

I feel so empty right now
I have been so happy and upbeat for months..
despite him paying a few bucks in child support and not seeing his child in 2013
despite him putting a whore and her kid before his own
claiming her baby and all
me carrying my daughter alone
i facebook stalked and his friends and family like her stats about her starting a job(1st job ever) to support her family
i gave so many years and he pushed my baby away since she was in my belly
his family was not formerly introduced the way he introduced this actual escort
and My daughter is in the dark
she is so beautiful and smart
how could he?
I just want to die
for giving such a precious child a terrible daddy due to my wreckless behaior in love with a loser
i lost
he left us and I don't know what to do
I am loving mommyhood
but i dread raising a fatherless daughter because those little girls are lost
she is happy now but I know she will wonder later
i cry her furture tears now
he never calls to check on her
it hurts so bad
she is amazing
why did I do this to my baby?


i am in the floor typing this in a fetal position crying out to God...why is he doing this? I did everything right and my baby does not deserve this...she is innocent

 

[jexter]

I am so sorry to read this! Some guys are absolute selfish idiots. Try not to stalk too much and read things that will hurt you. Think about you and the little one! Chin up x

 

[JennyBLove]

Aww im sorry you are feeling this way . I understand totally. Im 31 weeks now and the father left me a lil while after we found out. We were trying. And I he is not here for me or our growing baby. Only thing that matters to him is his new girllfriend hes been seeing since he left. He told her wasnt his baby when it is, and I still am hurting bad without him here n mostly the fact I do all this on my own n she will not have a good father. He may turn around for her but I doubt it. I know it hurts, but I feel it all happens for a reason sadlly enough. I feel so shitty just like you and to think it will be like that later like with your baby. im sorrry but knoow she has all your love!!! I nvr had a dad n I kno how it is n it hurts later in life. So I understand. I hope u feel better n im always here to talk.

 

[Louisandemma]

I am so sorry that you feel like this. Some men are unreal, as are some women.

I have a little girl, she's my everything. I don't understand how other Dad's don't feel the same.

I'm here if you need to talk. x (Lewis)

 

[lemontree12]

reading your post reminded me of myself. i to have a daughter whos father left us while pregnant for another girl, he also does not see my daughter or call. infact he has never asked about her. and we dont talk anymore. his parents also dont give a shit, its hard to think i was part of that family for 4years.
im not sure how long you have been dealing with this alone? but for me its been a year and a half nearly. and i can safely say im over this. i used to dwell in everything , my daughter growing up without a dad, him not giving a shit, pretendng to be someone he wasnt. now i look at all the positives. my daughter is an extremely happy and well loved little girl, she shows no signs of missing out on that father figure, yes she will question an wonder who he is when she gets older, but as long as i give her a life full of love and happiness, she should never feel that void. then theres the point of, would i want a selfish waster being any part of such an amazing litle girls life and ruin it, but filling her with empty promises and lies, putting his gf before his flesh and blood.
you also got to think of the bond you and your daughter will have because its just you two and the amount of respect she will have for you when she gets older.
nowadays its not uncommon for these sperm donars to piss of, so my daughter wont be the only kid to come from a broken family.

it does get easier, i know. i can say that not a day in the last 5months have i wished our lifes to be any different, and be happily married with my daughters dad. yes i wish she had a family, but not with that man.

chin up. if you want to message me feel free. the girls on here really helped me during my darkest days xxx

 

[ecotime47]

My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you and your precious daughter are going through this. Do your best not to focus on him and the decisions he's made in his life. You can't change him or force him to be the daddy your daughter deserves. Focus on what you can control; being a great mom and raising your daughter well. I will be praying for you and your daughter. BTW, God sees those tears!

 

[whatwillbe]

I know how you feel Hun, fob left me when I was 5 weeks pregnant, she's almost 3 months and he's never met her yet, i have the same questions as you, like how could he not want to be involved in his own daughters life ? It hurts a lot , but I agree with what a pp said, would you really want a man like that around your lo ? Who would just let her down time and time again, until eventually she'll think it's her fault somehow and will expect no better from any man that enters her life , my lo's dad would never be someone she could rely on, so even though it hurts I think it's best she doesn't see him, she can't miss a dad she's never known, all you can do is be the best mom you can be, stay strong, an I hope it gets better for you, and me too, these "men" should be castrated, they will never know the pain they cause x

 

[Dezireey]

I have been crying a lot this week too. I get some real bad days sometimes and I am screaming inside 'why! why!' but it falls on deaf ears and I am done trying to get my FOB to understand any of it. The way i see it hun, the moment he left you, the moment these horrible, spineless gits walk out the door for good is the moment we should stop caring and the moment we should never, ever look back. Each day they hurt us, or make us cry, is a day of happiness wasted. I didnt contact my fOb for nearly a month and i felt so good, then I text him and all the pain came flooding back when he said he missed talking to me, the next day he didnt even answer me. So he made a fool of me all over again and i only have myself to blame. i highly recommend counselling or therapy when the hurt is that bad. it can help you heal and get the anger out. Im still working on my anger issues. I have never, in my life imagined throwing someone off a cliff - but I imagine doing it to my FOB for what he has done. All men that leave their pregnant 'partners' and just disappear are spineless, gutless toads. I understand men who dont want to settle down, I understand men who believe they were trapped etc etc. But just walking away, ignoring them and destroying two peoples lives like that? Shame on them all. All we ladies want really is support and help and acceptance but these arseholes dont get it. We can get over them, we have got over other relationships before, duh. But the wound cuts too deep for us when you leave your innocent child.*

Hun , you have to be strong for your baby and make all the time you have with them happy times. Dont let him take that away from you aswell. Refuse to love him, or care about the situation and eventually you will believe that you dont care. They took away a precious time for us, dont let the ******* take away your happiness with your LO.*

Hugs xx

 

[Dezireey]

Forgot to say

If the character of a man is that he is unreliable, untrustworthy, cruel and unkind then if that man later decided to be in your child's life, should you or could you let him in to your child's life?

I think i will look back one day and probably be pleased my sons Dad is gone. He is not what I want my son to grow up like. i made a bad decision getting in a relationship with him but he gave me my boy and that was his only nice purpose in my life.

 

[babycrazy1706]

sorry. big hugs. Xx

 

[Dream.dream]

So sorry

However maybe its a blessing . She can't miss what she's never had and clearly he does not deserve her at all. You might find someone who deserve your and your daughter and will love her as his own. And even if you don't you live you daughter and she will have a strong attachment to you and won't miss him

Keep your chin up

 

[babycrazy1706]

How are you feeling now danie1stbaby?? Xx