My husband only says no.

[SaraVO]

I'm fifteen weeks yesterday and have an appointment on Thursday I keep reading that I might find out the gender but, all of my really crazy dreams are of a boy so I'm really thinking that is what we are having. My concern is a name. In my culture or maybe just family it's considered bad luck to not names baby after a family member. There is literally no such thing as a name just because someone liked it.

My husband's family is the same. But when I bought up that the name needs to come from his side. There are almost all boys among my cousins and siblings so the names have been used.... a lot. There are five michaels living four Joseph's four Anthony's... you see the problem. My husband says no. Partly because he has Ralph, Ted, Wilfred, Larry.... and partly because he thinks he should have his own identity. He has said no naming him after my husband because he doesn't like his initials. B.O. and he doesn't want him called junior. He also says nothing that starts with B J or F because O is our last name. I get that. But dang it I'm tired of saying It and I want a name. Any suggestions to get him moving on making a decision? He wants to wait until six months I want our kid to have a name...

 

[MUMOF5]

How about using a family name as a middle name as a compromise? I would suggest u both putting names u like on a list and go through them both together to come up with a joint list, and maybe agreeing on who's middle name you would use. Good luck xx

 

[CandiceSj]

I'm nowhere near finding a name either at 26 weeks... But I've learned that there's a lot of compromise involved...! Is using a name you like as a first name, and a family name as a middle name an option for you? If so, then you might be able to start working with your husband on name choices, with a newly "wide open" list of names that opens up!

Another compromise could be to use a derivative of a family name. Wilfred could open up to being any Wil name. William, Wilmer or just Will. Or even a "Fred" name!

What culture are you from? It's my first time hearing of this tradition, I find it very interesting

 

[SaraVO]

Second generation Portuguese. My husband is fourth generation so he is definitely a little more liberal. I think it became a bigger deal when my grandparents came to the states but we are all named after some else. My husband has chosen his middle name to pass down so Richard is a definite. But he really does want a new to our families name. I am passing down my grandmother's name if it's a girl. Oralia briann. My husband is Brian and my mother is Ann so I feel good about that. We can call her Ora (my grandma went by Ora or Ella. Haven't told my husband yet mostly because I will be shocked if it is a girl. Everything in me says boy and it's so loud in my head. That it's hard to think girl in any real was.

 

[SaraVO]

We're superstitious people my twin had a son a few years ago and went with her godparents last name and our father's name as a middle. She really liked Cole for a boy but the day before he was born she said she panicked that he wouldn't feel connected to our family and his heritage that she told her husband his name as she was being taken in for her c section.

 

[BunnyN]

Are you able to look further back in the family tree? Maybe there is a name that is still a family name that hasnt been carried on by anyone else but you could still say its a family name?

 

[SaraVO]

My husband thinks his middle name which is his dad's and grandfathers is enough. He wants a new name. He doesn't want to choose something that is on our family tree and wants him to have his own identity and a clean slate. Nobody to try to honor or live up to. He wants him to be his own man. So, okay I'm good with that.besides I have never considered being able to just choose. It's kind of a rush. It's very liberating. So I'm going to roll with it and see how it feels. My sister wimped out when she thought she would just choose but her husband left it up to her. My husband has very strong opinions and I feel like it's going to have to be both of us deciding.

But that said I love the name Isaiah Richard. I also like Owen Richard. I know that I don't want anything unisex. I want his name to look like a man's name on paper. My husband likes Evan but I have a nephew and cousin named Ethan and that sounds too matchy... I'm a twin and have an aversion to things matching too much.

 

[Laroawan]

I like Owen Richard.

 

[SaraVO]

My husband thinks it's from greys anatomy. (It's the only thing I make him sit through every week) honestly it's not but he doesn't like the idea of tv characters as inspiration. And he also knew a stoner cook years ago named Isaiah so he isn't thrilled with that one either. Truly it's going to be impossible. I think he secretly has a name and is trying to wear me down so I'll let him choose.... but I'm doing the same to a girl so I can't complain that much.

 

[Eleanor ace]

If you wanted to compromise you could choose a name which is connected to family names, like Theo for Ted (both from Theodore) or Eddie (as Eddie and Ted are both shortened from Edward), Fred or Will instead of Wilfred. Or give him a family name as his first name but call him by his middle name; I've known a few people who were named this way. But I think that going with a new name is a great plan if you feel happy with it

 

[hellojello25]

We already know that our baby is a boy through blood testing and we are putting my father's first name as the baby's middle name. Alexander James P.... so that way we can honor my dad but still give the baby his own name. It was a good compromise. Could you do something like that?

 

[SaraVO]

We already know that our baby is a boy through blood testing and we are putting my father's first name as the baby's middle name. Alexander James P.... so that way we can honor my dad but still give the baby his own name. It was a good compromise. Could you do something like that?

Yeah. He is fine passing his middle name down so Richard it is. But the first name is the problem. I suggested two more last night that got an immediate no. I am really starting to think that he already picked something and he is either waiting for me to "suggest" it on my own or he will tell me after we know the gender for sure.

He has told me that he is afraid of a girl. The unknown coupled with baby girls turn into teenage girls who date teenage boys are a little scary for him. He keeps saying that HE was a teenage boy!! Lol I think he doesn't want to jinx the not scary possibility of a boy. The worries that he has are kind of funny. I mean he is actually concerned that he would beat up a kid that messed with his daughter... like asked if I would bail him out of jail worried.

 

[BunnyN]

My husband was worried about having a teenage girl too. As soon as we found out we were having a girl he was excited and now they are super close. The next pregnancy he wanted another girl, it was a boy, lol.