My mum and me have grown apart :(

[mayb_baby]

MUM
My mum charges me £90 a fort night to live at home all my JSA (benefits Job seekers allowance) as I left school after my exams and point blank no one is hiring anyone atm! So I have zero for me (I want to start getting bits and some bigger clothes but I am relying on OH which I hate)

She kept her alcoholic brother for £25 a week for 6 months and provided him with tobacco to help him come off the drink
I only want to be here for 3 more months until I can go on income support and get my own place for me and bubba OH is staying at his. (Just wants his own comfy life and see his child if and when it suits him )

For my Birthday she gave me a card (we were on hols) and inside it said “£100 for you tomorrow” I was so happy as I have nothing and the whole holiday if I wanted t eat or drink OH got everything and I hate relying on him as he does work his ass off and save lots. So the next day I said “Keep it you might need it for the holiday and I’ll get it at home” (I didn’t want her or the kids cutting short on holidays) She was happy and was all “thank you blah blah blah”

The next day was so hot and I had a £2 bottle of water my OH got and there was a quarter left in it and dad asked for a bit and I said no I'm dying of thirst and mum was like “ungrateful, greedy wee bitch you’re getting F**K all now” so now I'm back to square one on the money front. I mean I can’t even save for my baby!

She always picks on me to the point where my cousins are like “don’t you say anything she hates you” if we want to ask her something or talk to her. She is great in a way as she looks after my cousin who is severely disabled with MD, but she seems to allow our house to revolve around her and now I feel like I'm no longer apart of this family. My cousin drew a family picture with mum in school and I was left out its silly and they genuinely forgot but I cried lol.

I try to make an effort with my mum as we were so close now I feel like she hates me and no longer needs me (my stepdad worked away for 5 years and I was the one she came to about everything especially when we learned my cousin had this terminal illness, now he’s back and I'm tossed aside )

I used to tell her everything now I feel I'm walking on eggshells and all she can say is “God I cant wait to you go it alone and see how hard it is”

Sorry for the rant I'm upset and I miss my mum the way we used to be, I'm so upset and I cry all the time as I just want her back the way we used to be. She was a young mum and even with my step dad I always felt we were a team me and her, but now I feel like an intruder in my own home

Thank you if you took your time to read this rant or cry of self pity whatever it is

xxxxxx

 

[Tanara]

didnt want to R&R

I dont have a close relationship with my parents so im not help. All i can say is it gets better once your on your own.

 

[mayb_baby]

I am hoping that thank you

 

[Tanara]

I had to live with my dad for a while, and he and I are to much alike so we contantly butt heads, he Has been nothing but supportive since i moved, he gave me and the OH a whole bunch of stuff.

 

[youngmum2b]

Sound like what me n my mum are going through, it werent till i told her to f off n that i didnt need her or her stupidness anymore that she came round n said she was sorry n she didnt realise how hurtful she was being.
I'd say talk to her or write a letter if possible.

 

[WaitingForYou]

Things can be extremely difficult on benefits, I feel your pain. Chin up darling. your brother sounds like an idiot, he is 25 and acting like that. I'd just try to stay out of his way, don't make yourself dehydrated though. Can you take a bottle of water to your room so you don't have to keep going down? Out of interest are you a lot younger than him?

Parents can be arseholes too. My mum kicked me out and didn't talk to me until after my daughter was born (only because I really wanted her support with breastfeeding, I was finding it very difficult). We never had a close relationship, always argued, but having my daughter has given us a common ground it would seem. Things do get better. Don't worry about her 'moodiness' they have funny ways of showing they care. I bet she is just worried as to how you will cope when baba is here. She will realize when baba is here that you are doing a great job and will be just fine.

When you become a parent you can feel so many things from the other point of view (I realize this now), than that of a child. I feel guilty for being so hard to get out of bed when I was at school (I have to get OH up now - pain in the arse). Feel bad for making it difficult for my parents by getting in trouble and having to move etc. I hope my daughter isn't a naughty girl.

 

[mrsmartin91]

Didnt want to read and run. Hugs.

 

[mayb_baby]

thank you all who replied I hope it does all change cant wait to my LO is here xox

 

[LoisP]

Yeah i don't really know what to say, sounds like your having a right sh*t time tbh. really hope things get better chick xxxxxxx

 

[Natasha2605]

Aw I don't have any advice but I hope things get better for you Just look forward to your LO, maybe your mothers attitude will change throughout your pregnancy. My mum was less than keen at first but eventually came round and now we're closer than ever and she absolutely dotes on Summer xx