need to vent.. insensitive remarks

[readytogiveup]

god it makes me so bloody mad, was talking with someone thought to be friend at work about miscarriage 5wks ago and i suppose i found out what people are saying about it behind my back. bit of background info am 43 and have 3 wonderful children 25,23 and 3 so not as if only chance but i feel it hurts as much whether you have none or 10 kids. so i was moanin bout fact have had 2 really heavy periods since ERPC and she say oh well perhaps is my body getting ready for menopause... oh well thank you very much my dear friend that idea NEVER crosses my mind, thank you you ray of bloody sunshine, you missed your call working for the samaritans i am sure you alone could reduce the population ten fold with all the suicides that would ensue.. anybody else had any insensitive remarks ?. i say to the nay sayers this is my body and if i feel i want one more baby the i will and if they dont like it they can kiss their own behinds.. sorry to rant needed to let off steam, am wound up cos am as far as i know in 2ww, thank you to all who can be bothered to read this all the way thru.. good luck to you all regardless of age sarah xx

 

[SugarFairy]

People just don't think before they say these things! She should have just kept her mouth shut if she couldn't think of anything positive to say!
I'm 25 myself but my youngest brother is only 6. My Mum had him at 39 and my grandparents clearly didn't approve. Makes me angry that my Mum took crap off her own parents for her pregnancy - and not just that one but earlier ones too (there's 7 of us).
F*ck everyone else! Its your body. You do what you feel is right. I'm sorry for your loss. And please excuse my mini rant. Hoping you get your sticky bean soon x

 

[susan36]

hey i know how you feel , when i had my mmc in june my mum my bloody own mum says its your age im 36 she said ur eggs are not as good and u should just give up , well i stick the 2 fingers up at the lot of them , if we feel we want another baby we should have 1 feck everyone else they dont have to bring it up , and sending you a big

 

[LucyJ]

I am so sorry that you have been through this people can be very insensitive and dont think about what they say before they say it. I also think if you've never experienced a mc its very hard to understand the pain and trauma that you go through. I had my brother tell me well its only a miscarriage no big deal you move on and try again I know he didnt mean it the way it came out but it really hurt me but worse than that was the midwife I spoke to for advice just before my 12 week scan as I was worried and was told well if you going to lose the baby your going to lose it might as well cancel your scan and see what happens I told her I did not want my scan cancelled as I needed to know everything was ok it wasn't sadly we found out at the scan that our little one had died at 10 weeks this was our first baby and it was just devastating.

I am so sorry for your loss and the insenstive people around try to ignore them they just dont understand.

 

[Keep Faith]

Hi im new here but just saw this thread and had to get involved!
People are crap, i have finally realised that most people are not worth talking to abiut TTC and M/C unless they have been thru it they really dont get it and can be sooooo hurtful!
I have been TTC for 3 yrs and have had 2 M/C, im going for first appt today at infertility clinic.
This whole part of my life has been very long and very sad! Ive lost alot of friends along the way and 3 months ago my own sister told me she wants nothing to do with me as she cant understand why im so shut down around babies,(she has just had her 2nd) i havent spoken to her at all since then, and we were really close b4. It all hurts so much it is impossible to put into words.
Sorry if i come across as a nutter! Its just this is all so differcult and some people make it so much worse, ive learnt now that if they really care they will try and understand and those that dont i will live without.

 

[readytogiveup]

hi girls thanks for all the support, just feel so frustrated. i meet more nay sayers than people in favour. you shud not have to worry about other peoples insensitivity regarding being shut down round babies, i have no idea what it is like to have no children but we lost a grandchild to cot death and i know i shut down to other babies, if someone held one out to me i couldnt run away quick enough so you have nothing to feel bad about at all goodluck to all of you and once again thank you for replies sarah x

 

[Lucina]

Don't let the idiots get to you, hard as it is. I confided in a colleague about my mc's as thought it might make her shut her trap a bit as she is pregnant and talks about it constantly. No such luck, one day in between moaning about her morning sickness she actually turned to me and said I was lucky to be missing out on all that!

 

[SugarFairy]

Don't let the idiots get to you, hard as it is. I confided in a colleague about my mc's as thought it might make her shut her trap a bit as she is pregnant and talks about it constantly. No such luck, one day in between moaning about her morning sickness she actually turned to me and said I was lucky to be missing out on all that!

Shocking what an idiot

 

[readytogiveup]

Don't let the idiots get to you, hard as it is. I confided in a colleague about my mc's as thought it might make her shut her trap a bit as she is pregnant and talks about it constantly. No such luck, one day in between moaning about her morning sickness she actually turned to me and said I was lucky to be missing out on all that!

god if that dont take the bloody biscuit, do people assume once you have lost the baby you should just say oh well. as mentioned before we had a cot death in the family and i think whether you are only a few weeks preg or if your BABY was 50 when you loose them, that was your child and the pain is just as great. you will always feel you have been robbed of the time you should have had with that child. it has been 6yrs since my beautiful granson died of cot death and even now i can just burst into tears. i say dont feel guilty having emotions the nay sayers should be put in the stocks. i am going to sound very bigotted and say preg women who smoke and drink dont deserve to be preg at all my god havent they heard of FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME.. sorry getting near to day and a little over wrought. to all of you lovely ladies out there waiting and hoping a lovely large sprinkle of for you all x