New to baby and bump...scared after 2 losses, any advice pleease

[Baileyjo]

Hi,

I've been reading these forums since my hubby and I started ttc in May this year and I have finally plucked up the courage to join. Could really do with some advice from you great ladies at bnb. We were very fortunate to get pregnant straight away in May but lost the baby at 6 weeks with a suspected ectopic which cleared itself. I was devastated, really never thought it would happen to us. It was a messy miscarriage that dragged on and on, I bled for 5 weeks. Anyway we did the "right" thing and waited till I got my first AF (which was 9 weeks after mc) and started ttc again. two months later in October we fell pregnant again. This time I was overjoyed and felt sure this was our bean, however at exactly 6 weeks again i began miscarrying. This time the miscarriage was over in 4 days. the EPU were pretty unhelpful and told me they could do nothing till i had another mc, but that since i am only 27 and my hubby 30 we had age on our side. So I took myself to my GP who was fab and referred me straight away to a gynecologist at the hospital...(my appointment is in a week!) But now i'm really scared, worried what will happen at the appointment, worried that they'll tell me to wait 2 or 3 months whilst they test me when i could be trying again, worried that i shouldnt have gone to my GP.....I wish i knew what the right thing was to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation and gone on to have a healthy baby. or got any idea what I can expect at the gynecologist appointment? would really appreciate any advice, have never felt more nervous, low or alone. thanks

 

[shelleney]

Hi there.
Firstly, can I say how sorry I am for your losses
The start of your story is very similar to mine: started TTC in May, fell pregnant straight away, ectopic at 6 weeks, bled for 5 weeks. All the same. So im here if you want to talk to someone who understands?
But I dont know what its like to have a 2nd loss, and my GP and EPU arent interested in helping me. So I cant really give you any advice in that area.
I hope you get everything sorted, and go on to have a BFP and healthy pregnancy and baby soon.
Take care Hun xx

 

[Baileyjo]

Hi, thanks for the support. It's amazing how you can have so many people around you in life trying to make you feel better, yet you get more satisfaction drawing support from a website. Perhaps its easier to talk to people who've been through exactly the same thing. Thats crazy that your experience was so similar to ours at the beginning, I'm holding on to the fact that we can conceive easily, just dont seem to be able to hold onto it. I hope you get your BFP soon too hun. The whole baby making process is so much harder than i ever expected it to be xx

 

[Chilli]

Bailey, I have been in your situation and it's such a hard call and a very personal decision. I waited even though unlike you I don't have time on my side mainly because I thought that if it meant I didn't lose another child it had to be worth the wait.

They will take a couple of blood samples, discuss you history and possibly give you a scan. They might want to repeat the bloods after 6 weeks. Then, when you get the results back (which can take about 6 weeks again) they'll let you know if they've found anything they can help you with. I'm sure they'll explain everything to you when you go, but go armd with any queries you have in writing so that you don't get over-emotional and forget everything while you're there. Also (for the same reason) ask them to let you have any results in writing.

Good luck and sorry for your losses

 

[Baileyjo]

Hi Chilli, thanks for the info. I think im gonna just wait and see what they say and then see how we feel in the new year. I cant imagine going through it all again, but if we miscarried again i guess i would definitely hold off until we had further tests....and if we ttc but dont get preg whilst getting tested then i guess it wont matter. ah! why cant things be easy! I really appreciate the feed back though xx

 

[shelleney]

I feel the same. I cant talk to my family and friends, coz they dont understand. and I rarely talk to my partner about it, coz hes struggling to cope himself. Yet, I find such strength and support on here. I look forward to logging on every night and talking to my new friends.

Thank you Hun, and good luck for a BFP for you too
xx