One month to go and I'm bricking it.

[babydust92]

My due date is the 25th of October but we all know that there's a 5% chance of that being the date.
She could come before or maybe even after. This will be my first child so my first labor/giving birth.
I'm filled with so much anxiety right now it's unbelieveable and it doesn't help that I'm a very anxious person and I worry about pretty much everything.

Before I was pregnant and my sister gave birth (5 years ago) so that anxiety has been building up I honestly thought this was how it went:
1. Waters break
2. Rush to hospital
3. You are given any pain relief wanted
4. Push baby out
5. Enjoy motherhood.

I was so guillable until my sister gave birth. Her waters broke 2 weeks before her due date, she rushed to the hospital only to return back home after an hour. She went through all of her contractions at home in her bath rub with no pain relief (It was hard to watch). After 6 hours of being in pain she went back to the hospital because she couldn't stop pushing. Her son was born literally minutes when she reached the hosital.

Watching One Born Every Minute doesn't help because they go to hospital and they stay there being monitored and the same goes for people who vlog their births.
I've read stories of women being turned away only to give birth in the street because they couldn't make it back in time.

I feel like my ideal birth would be a waterbirth with gas and air. However the hospital I'm going to give birth in only has one bath so my chances of a waterbirth are very low as I know they can be popular.
I'm scared of going to the hospital and being turned away, spending loads of money on Taxi's as we don't drive. That will play havoc on my anxiety and I know that to have a somewhat 'peaceful' birth you need to remain calm and that might not happen. I don't want to be turned away like my sister and go through all of the contractions at home without pain relief. I'm terrible when it comes to pain. I almost blacked out at 22 weeks when my sciatica got so bad.

I'm scared of tearing, assisted deliveries or even getting the ring of fire people talk about.
I'm scared to give birth and it really doesn't help that I have a feeling I will be turned away, I won't get my water birth and my second alternative was an epidural and I'm sure they won't even get me that because after being turned away I'll return being far too dilated to receive one.

I can't wait to hold my little girl in my arms but I'm afraid I'll have a traumatic delivery

I literally look at women who have children and say to myself "She gave birth and she looks fine. I can do it" I don't know how many times I've done that. I keep on thinking of the millions of women who did it back in the stone ages with no pain relief. I'm such a wuss.

 

[swedengirl]

Hey!!

This was me for a while whilst I was pregnant with DD! I was really nervous, thought I’d be sent home as I had a low pain threshold and would go too early and panic at the pain knowing it would likely happen for hours and hours!

I decided to buy the positive birth book and work on reducing my anxiety. I went to an awesome pregnancy yoga (I’m not really a “yoga person”) that helped you train yourself to be present and not forward think too much.

Now at 37 weeks my labour started. Mild period pains in the morning very irregular. At 17.00 my first real contraction. I had decided I wanted to stay at home for as long as I could handle the pain. I had a tens machine which helped and rocked on my birthing ball. I used a lot of the yoga stuff in this period. I laboured in our living room with my OH until about 23.00 when I felt the contractions we’re getting harder to handle myself and I started vomiting.

Arrived at hospital at midnight. Hooked me up to the CTG and said I’d be monitored for 20 minutes. They asked if I wanted pain relief and I said I could handle it for now and waited to wait until it was really bad. They came in after the 20 minutes wanted to check how dilated I was. I stood up to remove my trousers, my water broke, she examined me and I was 8cm. Then within 5 minutes of that my daughter arrived. I took one puff on the gas and air.I needed three stitches. I screamed a lot but I don’t remember it hurting an unbelievable amount it was more my bodies natural reaction of coping to a human moving out of my body! Of course it hurt but it’s a different type of pain.

I’m pregnant with number 2 and almost have the feeling of looking forward to giving birth again.

Now since having a baby I’ve noticed people seem trained to tell bad birthstories. Like it’s a way of describing how awesome we are- as we are! But in order for it to have been an awesome job it just have been extremely painful and tough. But the more I speak to other mums- the more I realise how many good births do happen! Of course it’s not every birth and like your poor sister there are bad stories but not all of them are bad!

Anyway I hoped that helped as I like you was nervous and anxious! But you might have an awesome birth!

 

[Teanna]

Congrats, I'm also due Oct 25th. I'm starting to think about labor as well. I'm not sure where you are located but in Canada I think a common recommendation here is having contractions 3 minutes apart for an hour or longer as a guide to when to go to the hospital. If your in active labor they shouldn't turn you away.

 

[HLx]

Honestly I know you probably hear this a lot but you will be completely fine! The worst bit is working yourself up about labour and birth! Its hurts yes of course it does, but honestly if it was THAT bad I wouldn't be sat here pregnant with my 3rd I've also tore on my last 2 babies and tbh I didn't feel it, attest I dont think I did, the pushing sort of takes away the tearing pain if that makes sense, I've had two completely different labours so far, one being 7 hours and textbook the other being 2 hours and complicated, but it never put me off I know you'll be fine, going through it might seem like the worst thing in the world but once its over with you think, I cannot believe I just done that! For me the afterpains of labour (the bleeding, cramps, and the peeing while you have stitches) is worse than giving birth itself, but then you look at your baby and think, you are so worth it! You will honestly do amazing x