Petrified of the labour need advice for not losing control

[hawalkden]

I really need some positive advice and relaxation about my labour. I'm 23 weeks tomorrow and I and Type One Diabetic and midwife said I'm going to expect a little bit larger baby and consultants let well controlled blood sugars ladies to go till 40 weeks which scares me midwife has said to get 3-6 months clothes just incase and I'm not exactally big frame.
I'm 5foot and post preg 8/10.
How do I keep relaxed about the whole pregnancy and labour starting any time when it comes, I wanted a water birth and be active throughout the birth but due to diabetes I have to be in bed monitored and dripped up and I feel like I've been given little options of birth plans.
I also don't want to loss control when the pain gets to bad; my pain thresh hold isn't the best and I dont want to be totally horrid or just get toally stressed out.
Any advice?!
Xx

 

[Eternal]

Staying calm with help with pain and help you feel in control, if you panic you will get scared and the pain gets intesifies.

Are you under consultant care? Did they tell you all this already? or was this just your MW?

If your up for pain releif then there are different things avalaible, TENS is great for early labour, pethidine, epidural, gas & air, moving, water, hypno-birthing.

Some things work for some and others for others.

If your worried about losing control I would recommend hyno-birthing, i havent had any experince myself, but I know lots of people who have and they feel it helps keep them in control and focused, they have differing opioions on if it helps with pain, but all seemed to think it helped focus and control.

You will hear horror stories about giving birth and yes its painful but so is getting a wax! lol! Its not the worse pain I have ever expereinced, my gallstone attacks have been far worse than my labour. But all pain is distressing and when anyone is any pain all you want to do is get it over with.

You need to focus on each pain being a bit closer to your baby, its not going to last forever. At one point I totally lost it and started panicing, mostly because i just couldnt see how could cope much longer and i knew it had to get worse. You need to not think about how far diltated you are or anything like that, just focus on every pain is closer to it being over. I found once i stopped panicing and relaxed a bit i dilated very very quickly.

PM me if you have any specific questions.

 

[LockandKey]

would it be possible for you to take a birthing class? Those will teach you about deep breathing techniques that help tremendously during labor. I know it's hard when there's so much to worry about, but try to stay calm and relax. I was stressed out in my last few weeks, but as soon as I relaxed, labor started within 12 hours. Stress can actually keep your body from going into labor, on top of making the pain 10 times worse than it really is, it can harm your baby too.

When my waters broke, there was meconium in the amniotic fluid. The doctors said it can happen in more mature babies (I was 40 weeks and 3 days) or it can happen when the mother is under stress, and the few days before labor began I was extremely stressed out. I'm certain there was meconium in her amniotic fluid because I was stressed. After her birth, they had to keep an extra eye on DD to make sure bacteria didn't get into her lungs because of the meconium in the fluids. Luckily she was bacteria free, but trust me, the stress can actually cause more problems.

 

[Eternal]

would it be possible for you to take a birthing class? Those will teach you about deep breathing techniques that help tremendously during labor. I know it's hard when there's so much to worry about, but try to stay calm and relax. I was stressed out in my last few weeks, but as soon as I relaxed, labor started within 12 hours. Stress can actually keep your body from going into labor, on top of making the pain 10 times worse than it really is, it can harm your baby too.

When my waters broke, there was meconium in the amniotic fluid. The doctors said it can happen in more mature babies (I was 40 weeks and 3 days) or it can happen when the mother is under stress, and the few days before labor began I was extremely stressed out. I'm certain there was meconium in her amniotic fluid because I was stressed. After her birth, they had to keep an extra eye on DD to make sure bacteria didn't get into her lungs because of the meconium in the fluids. Luckily she was bacteria free, but trust me, the stress can actually cause more problems.

I had the same, my son was 40 +6 and i went into totally panic at one point, but once i calmed down i realised it wasnt as bad was i though it was lol!

 

[Bocket]

I felt EXACTLY the same, and then as soon as I'd done it and given birth to my little girl I laughed and was on cloud 9! I'll go have a search for my birth story & post it here if you want to read.

I'm only 4"11, was told I'd have trouble giving birth, was warned I may need a c-section etc etc and even though baby was back to back when I went into labour- I managed with gas & air and didn't even swear- and I cried & nearly fainted having my glucose tolerance test!

It's a completely different pain, I found clock watching whilst I was having contractions helped, kept telling myself "In about a minute it'll stop" just listen to your body, the midwives etc are on your side so ask if you need more pain relief or reassurance etc, I kept asking which positions would help with the pain and my midwife was really good- even though I was on all kinds of monitors I was able to be in some odd positions! Good luck & I'm sure u will surprise yourself with how great you do! If you want to ask me any questions- feel free xxxx

 

[Bocket]

https://www.babyandbump.com/birth-stories-announcements/650200-my-lovely-birth.html

 

[prgirl_cesca]

I agree with the hypnobirthing.

I got given this book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Hypnobirth...=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1313422205&sr=1-2

And I read the first few chapters and they helped me unbelievably. Now I don't agree for a second you can give birth painlessly and without making a sound (as suggested in latter chapters of the book), but particularly the introduction was SO empowering and made me feel like I could totally do this myself.

Also I would suggest watching as many birthing programmes as possible - Home Birth Diaries, one born every minute, portland babies etc etc... I found so many stages of labour where I could have lost control (transition, crowning etc) easy to deal with as I knew what was going on with my body.

Good luck xx

 

[pumpkim]

Google Lazy Daisy birthing and see if there is a class in your area, I took them and they were amazing. I truly belive that they made my birth much easier. A lot is about active birth but I ended up strapped to the bed and I could still use the breathing and relaxation techniques to full effect. Managed to control the pain with no intervention until I was 8cm then g&a. I also pushed hin out in a short space of time using the technique we were taught.

I'm so convinced by their ethos that I would love to train as a teacher for them just the logistics of a career change at this point in my life are scary!