refusing bottle - UPDATE - success after a long day!

[ZooMa]

I'm so sad. I don't know what to do. We're trying to go cold-turkey today to teach V to accept the bottle. She needs to take the bottle by Wednesday since I will be at a conference all day. We have 5 different nipples to try, but she just screams whenever one of them touches her lips. She also gags and coughs if the milk drips in her mouth, so we've been working exclusively with the BreastFlow bottle today. She won't even latch and try. I don't know if she doesn't know what the nipple is for, or if she is complaining about something specific about the size and shape.

I haven't been in the same room with the baby since I last nursed at 9:30 this morning. Nana and Daddy have been working with her all day. She will scream and cry until she exhausts herself, nap for a little while, and then wake up screaming again. It's making me really, really sad.

What to do? What to do?

I know we can always try cup feeding or syringe feeding at a certain point, but I imagine there's a learning curve to that, as well. I just don't know when that point should be.

The current BM bottle is good for another couple hours - I think then I'm going to cave in and nurse her so she doesn't continue to be hysterical and continue to associate the artificial nipple with crying and stress. Then I guess we try again tomorrow.

When will it get better?!???

 

[nabo86]

have you tried giving her the bottle yourself? Sometimes my DD will only take a bottle from me.. I know you won't be there to give her it wednesday but she might be more comfortable with you the first couple of times and it might help her get used to taking it that way..

good luck - I hate hearing my LO cry and I have to let other people try and soothe her!

 

[ZooMa]

I've tried previously but not today. Same results. Most things I have read have suggested having someone else give the bottle is often the most successful... but I can always continue to introduce it around feeding time to try to switch the association from positive to negative.

While most people say the battle of wills or waiting till the baby gets hungry enough to take the bottle is not the ideal option (causes way too much stress), unfortunately some say that's the only last resort option that worked. And then of course there are those that it never worked for.

Currently Daddy is managing to drip a few drops in while she is swaddled tightly and being bounced on the yoga ball. Very tiring and slow, but she is (at this moment) calm. It's a step. I fear this is going to be a much longer process than I had hoped.

 

[_Lexi_]

We tried about 6 different types of bottles with various teats over about 7 weeks, before we found a bottle Jessica would accept without too much fuss. When we got stressed, we'd stop and try again another day. I hope you manage to get her to take one in time x

 

[Dk1234]

I wouldn't let the baby to 8 hrs without feeding that's just gonna cause more stress and a super hungry baby isn't gonna cooperate.

 

[Calif]

Does the bottle have freshly pumped milk? It may not taste as good if not.

Also your baby may smell you in the other room.

Also everything I read says don't make your baby take a bottle when she is upset. It won't work that way. Best to try when they're a little hungry but bot starving.

 

[ZooMa]

Update - success! She has taken about 5 ounces and finally figured out what all the fuss was about.

I want to clarify that we weren't forcing the bottle on her and were doing are best to keep this whole situation calm and comfortable. She was crying because she was hungry and frustrated - but she would wake up screaming without warning at other times before we had even started introducing the bottle. She just wants when she wants it, sometimes without any warning!

It was stressful for everyone involved, but she had to learn that milk comes from other sources besides boob. We had been introducing the bottle for several days now, just allowing her to feel the nipple when she was calm and tired. She didn't like it in her mouth and would fuss a little bit, but we always removed the nipple if she became upset. We definitely didn't want her to have negative associations.

I know no one wants to have the baby be hungry and upset, but if we didn't do it today we would have to do it Wednesday when there would not have been any other options since I have to go back to work. At least starting today when I was home would allow me to nurse if she ever became too hysterical to console.

Daddy did a WONDERFUL job all afternoon of swaddling, bouncing and comforting her to sleep, and then gently introducing the bottle when she was drowsy. She would mouth the nipple a bit and, finally, at one point started sucking in her sleep. When she finally got some milk her eyes flew open like - wow! there's food here! She then guzzled a couple ounces in as many minutes.

We had success with a tiny latex nipple from the cheapest bottle you can buy - $1.50 contraption that looks more like a doll bottle than the real thing. I'm hoping she doesn't learn bad latching habits from this set up. However, this is a huge step in the right direction, so we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

 

[nabo86]

great news - and well done daddy!

 

[Dk1234]

That's great