second time lucky?

[schnoogles]

Hi,

I desperately wanted to breast feed my son, but failed miserably within a week. I have flat nipples, my son gave me blood blisters within an hour of birth, my midwife then advised nipple shields which friction burnt me. I ended up pumping and got more blood than anything else. As my milk finally came in on day 7 I got terrible mastitis and my supply ground to a halt. I was advised by medical staff to bottle feed.

I was utterly heart broken and deeply ashamed to put him on the bottle. He had lost weight fast and was very nearly hospitalised. I was full of guilt and genuinely believed that I had failed my boy.

I am now pregnant with number 2 and desperate to breast feed again, but need some advice. Can someone with flat nipples successfully feed? Am I wasting time and energy putting myself through it again? And is there anything that I can do to increase my chances of success?

Any advice would be greatfully received

 

[noon_child]

Hand expression is much gentler on your nipples than pumping (which can pull at scabs or even cause damage if the flange is the wrong size). You could ask your health practitioner at what point before birth you could safely start practicing hand expression. If you get the hang of it you might even get some colostrum before the birth which you can freeze. Then if your nipples get damaged in those early days before your milk comes in, you can use what you have frozen to give your nipples a rest and keep baby's fluids up.

Lots of people with flat nipples breastfeed but it depends on the severity whether something like shields are necessary. If your nipples are quite tethered to the breast tissue (in other words they can't be pulled out, or only partially) a shield may well be necessary as the nipple needs to be right at the back of the baby's mouth under the soft palate and if it can't get there it will get very damaged. If they just lie flat but can be pulled out, then the same rules to attachment apply as with non-flat nipples - the baby must attach to the breast NOT the nipple and baby will draw the nipple out by suction. It is very common for newborns not to take enough breast in to their mouths and cause damage on even non-inverted nipples, especially if they have been affected by drugs during labour.

I'd advise talking to a lactation consultant, they can talk to you even before LO is born, and explain your history and your worries. If they discover you do need shields they can help you find the correct size and this should mean no more friction burns. If you are going to try without shields they can help you try positions that encourage deep latching.

Organisations like NCT and La Leche League (LLL) have volunteer lactation consultants who will visit for free if they live in your part of the country. I saw them any times. There isn't always one quick fix but continually asking for help, talking through what you have tried etc. can bring positive results. Pplease get in touch with these organisations.

 

[schnoogles]

Thank you so much. I think what didn't help last time was that I didn't realise flat nipples were an issue until he was born.

He made them into strange shapes which cracked them and kept giving me blisters which I guess means that he wasn't latched deeply enough. There where a few occasions when it didn't hurt and from outside he looked to be feeding, but the last time he did he was on for over an hour and came off with a totally dry mouth. His eyes had sunk and he started shaking from dehydration. At this point the midwife's took him away and gave him formula. The only other choice was a drip.

I will have a look now to see whether there is anyone close enough to travel to me.

 

[melfy77]

Success story here!! Bf didn't go well with DD1 and needed a nipple shield as I have one flat nipple. With DD2 it was a breeze!!! Didn't change anything she just had a much better latch! 26 months and still going!! And it fixed my nipple!! It's pretty much a normal shape now. So don't worry too much it might go a lot better this time around

 

[Banshee]

Trying to breastfeed ds1 was a disaster I ended up with horribly painful bleeding nipples that left me with scars. I was really worried the same would happen with ds2 but was quite pragmatic and thought 'if it doesn't work I'll just use formula' and not put myself through the trauma again but actually it all went really smoothly with ds2.

 

[schnoogles]

It's good to hear that it can work out with different babies.

Everyone keeps telling me not to stress, just use formula again. But they don't understand, this is something that I desperately want to do. It's so hard going to groups and seeing ladies feed and thinking "what if I had done things differently?" Last time I went through what I can only describe as mourning. It's daunting thinking that it could happen again. Last time I planned to feed for minimum of 6 months. This time if I can complete 1 month I would be ecstatic. I'm going to speak to my midwife about my concerns right from booking in.

Did you guys feel this strong urge. I feel so passionate about it!

 

[afisppq]

I would also recommend the Madela shells for inverted nipples. I had the same issue and didn't realize it until before DS was born, I was not able to BF the first time around either and was heartbroken. The shells really helped pull the nipple out, I would just wear them all day and it helped keep them aired out too. Plus I use nipple shields as well, I thought I could wean him off of them by now but no luck. I see it as I'm still able to breastfeed so it's a necessary evil. He gained 4 pounds in 4 weeks so I know they work just fine! ��

 

[chezababy]

It might be worth trying a latch assist. Search amazon as I can't remember the make.
I have inverted nipples and couldn't feed my first as she couldn't latch but my son is 15 weeks and exclusively breastfed so it is definitely possible to still breastfeed. Good luck.

 

[Banshee]

I absolutely felt passionate about breastfeeding and tried as hard as I could with ds1. I even had the health visitors suggesting maybe it was time to give up with everything J was going through but I felt like such a failure. You can only do what you can do x

 

[LoveCakes]

I'm in the same situation where I gave up with no1 but desperately want to with no2. I think this time around knowing it will be hard will help, the it's so easy and natural posters everywhere meant I figured when it wasn't then I was doing it wrong.
I'll see in a few months!

Good luck

 

[schnoogles]

Thanks everyone, it's good to know that I'm not alone in struggling and still wanting to breastfeed xx