Shy hello...

[DoodleDoo]

Hi, I found this forum this morning and have been looking through it all day. I just wanted to say hello.

I'm 19 (just, my birthday was yesterday) and found out yesterday that I'm 5 weeks pregnant. I've been with my 23 year old boyfriend for nearly two years however I was definitely not thinking about babies yet.

I'm so worried, I'm in my first year of university, I live in student housing and have no idea what to do. I told my boyfriend, he's been really supportive about it, even though he's nearly as scared as I am

I just wanted to post anyway, to talk to other people in a similar situation. Sorry if I shouldn't post here or something.

 

[MummyMana]

Congratulations! And happy birthday

 

[ClairAye]

Happy Yesterday Birthday and congratulations

I'm Clair, 20 and I have a wee boy called Jason and a wee girl called Lily

 

[Breeelizabeth]

Hi! Congrats and happy birthday for yesterday!
Let me say, I'm also 19 and in my first year of uni. I fell pregnant while living in student housing too, so I know exactly how you're feeling.

First of all it's great that your BF is supportive. Having his support is one less struggle and stress that you don't need right now.
You need to visit the doctor if you haven't already.
As for uni it is really hard at first, but ask for help if you need it, get lots of rest and eat well. If you need to talk feel free to PM me or something

 

[DoodleDoo]

Thanks so much for the support guys!

Breeelizabeth - how are you managing to stay at uni if you don't mind me asking? Its really important to me that I finish but I don't see how I can if I have to support a baby! Are your tutors reasonable about it? Where are you studying?

Sorry for all the questions!

 

[Breeelizabeth]

Hey
I'm studying nursing, I found that it was really hard to continue at the start, I was so sick and exhausted but I had a chat with my lecturers and the dean of nursing, and they all offered me some great advice (get lots of rest and to ask for help when I needed it) and made life very easy for me. I also confided in my friends who helped me study, or emailed me lecture notes if I was too unwell to attend. I won't lie, it is very tricky to keep up with mandatory attendance and assignments but I just had to learn to better manage my time. If I was feeling well one day I'd smash through as much as I could and then on days when I wasn't feeling so wonderful I could afford to slack off.

Another tip I was given, is if you fail a subject don't beat yourself up about it. I failed my science exams when I was about 13wks. Even though it puts my progression behind a little it know I'll still graduate at some point, and I'll keep pushing myself for my little girl.

I think most of the lecturers are pretty reasonable, I know they probably get a lot of pregnant people in their classes.
Can you do online/distance education? I did it for one of my subjects this semester and it was an absolute godsend, I could work through at my own pace and didn't have to show up to any classes for it.

What are you studying?

 

[DoodleDoo]

Thanks for all the advice, it's so helpful to speak to someone in a similar situation. I'm only 5+3 today (I just got 3+ on a digital test) but I'm already beginning to feel queasy. It's good to hear that studying with morning sickness is manageable.

I'm at the University of Nottingham, studying English Lit and Lang. I guess it's useful that most of my course is reading really I have a meeting with the health centre on campus to register there later, then hopefully I can get an appointment to advise me and check everything's okay with our baby. Are your university flexible with time off for your birth? I was considering taking a year out between first and second year.

Is your baby's father around during your pregnancy? Sorry for all the questions! It's all a little overwhelming right now :') thanks for replying though, it's so invaluable to me to hear from others.

 

[Breeelizabeth]

It's fine, honestly your situation sounds so much like mine and I would have done anything for someone to talk too!!

Great work getting something done about medical care, it's so important, even early on
also maybe have a look at getting some prenatal vitamins - not sure about where you live but I was able to get some that contained ingredients for morning sickness support (however I'm not sure if it did anything)

I'm able to defer my course for up to 2 years for whatever reason but have spoken to the careers people who have suggested I just drop my subjects back next semester (instead of doing 4 subjects I'll do 2) so that I can continue studying but still have time for the baby. If your campus has a careers advisor/counsellor they might be worth seeing.

As for baby's dad he isn't around, we started messing around a few months after I moved to uni. I was told I would never fall pregnant naturally so it was quite a shock for both of us. He also didn't tell me about his girlfriend, which is the main reason he's not around. He doesn't want her to find out. I've seen him a few times since I've been pregnant, at first he wanted me to get rid of the baby but now he's much more open to the idea and has promised to come and visit her once she's born. How about you, is baby's father around? Hope you don't mind me asking but have you told your family yet? How do you think they'll react?

 

[xforuiholdonx]

Hey there! Welcome and congratulations
I'm Lisa and I'm 22. My daughter Emma is 4 and my son is almost 17 months. Having a baby this young in life will not stop you from achieving your dreams, though for some like me it can delay it a little bit. It's scary at first but it gets better as time goes on! Here if you ever need to chat

 

[Rhio92]

Hello
I'm Rhiannon, 22, with a son, Connor who's nearly 4, and pregnant with a daughter.

I'm also at the university of nottingham Studying nursing.

It's so doable. I got pregnant with my son at 17, and started the course at 20. I lived with my parents, instead of halls, but that's because nursing requires placements and I needed childcare. At Nottingham, they have family accommodation, so you may be able to live there with your baby.

As for the course this year, it's up to you what to do. I chose to take a year out from August due to severe morning sickness, and will go back in august 2015 when my baby is 5 months old. But, you may manage to stay without taking a year out, if you wanted to. It's whatever is best for you. Remember, there are a couple of nurserys on/near the campus. Or you could find a childminder.

There are so many options available. Just make sure you communicate with your personal tutor, they can help you.

Feel free to PM me at any time, and good luck xxxxx

 

[Rhio92]

Family accommodation -

https://www.nottingham.ac.uk/accomm...nts/postgraduates/coupleandfamilyhousing.aspx

 

[x__amour]

Welcome to BnB and congratulations! I'm Shannon, 23.
I have an almost 4 year old named Victoria "Tori" and a 6 month old named Bryson.

I'm in the US so don't know much about the schooling system or anything like that but I hope everything works out for you. Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy.

 

[DoodleDoo]

It's fine, honestly your situation sounds so much like mine and I would have done anything for someone to talk too!!

Great work getting something done about medical care, it's so important, even early on
also maybe have a look at getting some prenatal vitamins - not sure about where you live but I was able to get some that contained ingredients for morning sickness support (however I'm not sure if it did anything)

I'm able to defer my course for up to 2 years for whatever reason but have spoken to the careers people who have suggested I just drop my subjects back next semester (instead of doing 4 subjects I'll do 2) so that I can continue studying but still have time for the baby. If your campus has a careers advisor/counsellor they might be worth seeing.

As for baby's dad he isn't around, we started messing around a few months after I moved to uni. I was told I would never fall pregnant naturally so it was quite a shock for both of us. He also didn't tell me about his girlfriend, which is the main reason he's not around. He doesn't want her to find out. I've seen him a few times since I've been pregnant, at first he wanted me to get rid of the baby but now he's much more open to the idea and has promised to come and visit her once she's born. How about you, is baby's father around? Hope you don't mind me asking but have you told your family yet? How do you think they'll react?

I'll have to look into the vitamins, thanks for the tip I'm taking folic acid already, should I take other ones too? I'm so clueless

It's really handy that you can drop back your course hours. I definitely need to speak with someone about my options regarding university. I am seeing the doctor on Monday so helpfully he can point me in the right direction!

I'm sorry to hear about your baby's dad, I guess it's nice that he wants to become involved now though does his girlfriend still not know?!

Again thanks for replying, it helps so much to hear from you girls on here

 

[DoodleDoo]

Hello
I'm Rhiannon, 22, with a son, Connor who's nearly 4, and pregnant with a daughter.

I'm also at the university of nottingham Studying nursing.

It's so doable. I got pregnant with my son at 17, and started the course at 20. I lived with my parents, instead of halls, but that's because nursing requires placements and I needed childcare. At Nottingham, they have family accommodation, so you may be able to live there with your baby.

As for the course this year, it's up to you what to do. I chose to take a year out from August due to severe morning sickness, and will go back in august 2015 when my baby is 5 months old. But, you may manage to stay without taking a year out, if you wanted to. It's whatever is best for you. Remember, there are a couple of nurserys on/near the campus. Or you could find a childminder.

There are so many options available. Just make sure you communicate with your personal tutor, they can help you.

Feel free to PM me at any time, and good luck xxxxx

Wow, I can't believe you're at Nottingham too, that makes me feel so much more optimistic! I just started in September and am due in June so I'm right at the beginning of my course. It's good that the uni have supported you!

Whereabouts do you live if you don't mind me asking? I live in Leicestershire, about 30 minutes drive from the university so living at home after year one is also an option for me. Do you find it easy to travel in?

Thanks so much for being nice about it all. It's so good to have advice from people that understand!

 

[Breeelizabeth]

I'll have to look into the vitamins, thanks for the tip I'm taking folic acid already, should I take other ones too? I'm so clueless

It's really handy that you can drop back your course hours. I definitely need to speak with someone about my options regarding university. I am seeing the doctor on Monday so helpfully he can point me in the right direction!

I'm sorry to hear about your baby's dad, I guess it's nice that he wants to become involved now though does his girlfriend still not know?!

Again thanks for replying, it helps so much to hear from you girls on here

I'm sure folic acid should be fine but double check when you see the doctor, they might be able to recommend something else.

As for his girlfriend I'm pretty sure he'll never tell her and because of his fear of owning up my baby will never know her dad's family, which is really upsetting.

Hope everything goes well at the doctors for you. They'll probably send you for a blood test and maybe even book you in for an ultrasound let us know how it goes!

 

[Rhio92]

How are you doing? xx

 

[skyesmom]

As for his girlfriend I'm pretty sure he'll never tell her and because of his fear of owning up my baby will never know her dad's family, which is really upsetting.

things as big and as life changing as these come out sooner or later. she'll find out in one way or another. he may be able to hide the pregnant you, but once your daughter is there, he won't be able to hide her forever.

it's very immature of him to act like this, and i admire your strength in all of it!

will you ask him for child support at least? it's not fair to leave you like this all alone, be there with a half promise as his fears command, but no real support to you at all?

the way he's acting now, he's paying no respect both to you and to his girlfriend.

i think he's not telling her not so much because he's afraid she'll dump him (a very likely thing to happen), but that if he does tell her (and his family), your baby will become... real. right now, he's in a denial. yet this doesn't excuse his behavior towards you.

 

[lucindatatum]

Hello, I am 18 and will be 19 in May.
About 4 weeks ago I found out that I was pregnant, and I am roughly 10 weeks along, had my first midwife appointment and I'm just waiting for a scan date. How far along are you?

What are your main concerns? Money? My partner and I are concerned about that too, so we can help one another, I guess.

It would be nice to speak somebody of a similar age to me and in this situation.

Take care xx

 

[DoodleDoo]

Hey lucinda

I'll add you as a contact on here. It would be lovely to speak to you! Feel free to dm me xo

 

[Breeelizabeth]

Hey lucinda

I'll add you as a contact on here. It would be lovely to speak to you! Feel free to dm me xo

Argh Doodle! I've been trying to PM you too but it doesn't seem to work! I wanted to see how everything is going!

Also welcome Lucinda
I'm Bree, I'm 19 and just about ready to pop with my first. Happy to chat at any time xx