So sad and feel alone

[nycmommy]

Hello ladies. I just feel a failure and my DH doesn't really I guess know how to talk to me. I miscarried at almost 8 weeks on March 16. We decided to skip a cycle, I got my period on April 21st. I read everyone and heard from everyone that after miscarriage your reply fertile. I have two kids and each was conceived on first cycle. So on my second cycle we started trying and my period is due in 2 days or today (my cycles are 33-35 days) but all the tests FReR ept clearblue...all negative. I'm so sad and heartbroken. First I can't carry pregnancy and now I can't even get pregnant. I feel like my body is betraying me. Why is it so hard the third time around?

 

[impatient1]

A miscarriage is so hard to cope with. and the fear of not getting pregnant agan is all consuming. I remember the days I feared I would never get pregnant again that the one pregnancy I was bleseed with was all I would have and I tortured myself with the possibilities. I wish there was something else I could do to ease the pain, questions and frustration but know that even though I don't know you I understand and am praying you get your rainbow baby soon.

 

[nycmommy]

A miscarriage is so hard to cope with. and the fear of not getting pregnant agan is all consuming. I remember the days I feared I would never get pregnant again that the one pregnancy I was bleseed with was all I would have and I tortured myself with the possibilities. I wish there was something else I could do to ease the pain, questions and frustration but know that even though I don't know you I understand and am praying you get your rainbow baby soon.

Thank you so much for responding. I feel heartbroken. Like all out of sudden I can't keep a pregnancy and now can't get pregnant. I read that there is second or third infertility but I'm 27 so age is not a factor and I'm so lost. I feel like if I reach out to doctor she will dismiss me and tell me to keep trying. And can't talk to my on cuz she is always like "feel blessed you have two maybe that's enough " and that's painful to hear.

 

[lucy_x]

I know exactly how you feel, it's so bloody hard. Only women who have miscarried truly understand, the pain is very very hard, there is no worse pain than preparing a place in your heart for a child who never arrives.

I have the same feeling every month, it's been 5 months nearly for me and every month it's like "the first were so easy, even the miscarriage pregnancy was an accident" - and I know you won't want to be told!"it will happen" because I know Im sick of hearing that!

So what I will tell you is, it's taken this long for my cycles to become regular again, I mean really regular. After miscarriage, my cycles were 32 days, I'm usually 29 days....last month I ovulate day 16 and a 29 day cycle. This month iv ovulate cycle day 16 again. I'm hoping that post miscarriage it just takes a while for our bodies to regularise everything again and get used to doing things in a 'normal' (Atleast for us) way again x

Do you temp chart? You may not even be ovulating yet, I reckon it took 2 cycles for me to do so, and evenue then on the third it was too late so wouldn't have sustained a prwgnancy anyway x

 

[cupcake23]

Hi NYC, how are you doing?

My story is very similar to yours, I also conceived my first 2 on my first months of ttc, I was also lucky to conceive very quickly with my 3rd pregnancy but sadly lost that pregnancy at 8 weeks in March too, I've never know grief like it, I felt so betrayed by my body.

You really need to give it some time, I know that's easier said than done, when all you want to do is have a baby in your arms but like Lucy says it may just take time for you to start ov, your body recovering from mc etc... I've heard good things about the SMEP plan so that's something you may consider.

Wishing you all the best xxx

 

[nycmommy]

Thanks ladies. I took opk a week ago and they turned very positive but that would have been a week after I should have ovulated so I thought I was pregnant since I read that sometimes those kits turn positive when your pregnant so I tested like crazy...I'm 5 days late still negative....I'm guessing I ovulated over a week late and now my period will be over a week late.....just been in such a funk

 

[nycmommy]

My cycles ussualy 33-35 days but no it seems it will be like 44 days although my cycle after miscarriage was 36 days. What the hell is going on

 

[vermeil]

*gentle hug* it's normal to take 12 even 18 months to conceive... I remember the heartbreak of a miscarriage... please give youself the time to heal. Thinking of you

 

[Bibijun]

It's a very sad that you had to go through all that I know all to well the pain. After 4 years of trying for my second child i lost the embryo at 8 weeks just before Christmas, I thought about its almost everyday, what went wrong what did I do. But I have come for realise it that if it was ment to be mine he or she would of stayed don't get me wrong I thought about it every day but as the days turn to week and months you think less and less about it. Even tho you don't forget you know life goes on and you have to go on. Keep trying for your miracle it will happen soon enough, me and my partner are still trying hoping our miracle. 🙂

 

[lucy_x]

My cycles ussualy 33-35 days but no it seems it will be like 44 days although my cycle after miscarriage was 36 days. What the hell is going on

Something I have learnt very recently, is that your lutel (the phase after ovulation) often as not does not change, Atleast only by a day or 2 either way.

For example if I ovulate day 16, I get my af day 28.
If I ovulate day 19 my cycle is 31 days

This is because I have a 12 day lutel phase. It very possible (and just an example to see figures) that you have a 12 day lutel phase you didn't ovulate until 32 days after your last af, where as the first cycle you ovulated cycle day 24.

Hope that makes sense, the only way I really feel in control is with bbt charting, it makes things very clear for me....it also showed I missed a couple of months and just didn't ovulate. X x