disneydarling
Mama to a baby girl
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- Feb 4, 2011
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My girl is now 3 months old, but I'm having a hard time coming to terms with the way she was born, so I thought writing my birth story might help.
At 2 days overdue I had no signs of labour at all, had a midwife appointment, she tried to do a sweep but couldn't because my cervix was so far back and closed still. I was SO upset, she booked me in for an induction at 12 days overdue, saying it was unlikely I'd go into labour within the next few days. Also, my baby that had been facing the right way for weeks and weeks, was now facing up!!
That day baby was very quiet and hardly moving, so at 6pm went into the hospital just for a check. Put on the monitor and baby's heartbeat was fine but she wasn't moving, and I was told that if it was still like that in an hour they'd induce me. 55 minutes later, with 5 minutes of monitoring left, she started kicking around like crazy, and I was sent home.
For the rest of the evening I was in so much pain, I really felt like she was beating me up from the inside, she was moving so much. Went to bed at 11pm very uncomfortable and fed up that labour was not going to happen any time soon.
At 1pm I was woken by my waters breaking!!! Woke my hubby and rang the hospital, they told me to wait half an hour, and if I was still wet that it was definitely my waters and to come into the hospital. Got to hospital at 2am and on the way there I got my first contraction.
Went into triage, the midwife confirmed that it was my waters and gave me a million leaflets to take home. They explained about what point my contractions should be when I came back or what to do if nothing happened in the next 24 hours (induction). She also told me that because my waters had broken I would not be allowed to have the water birth that I had been looking forward to for 9 months.
By this time my contractions were 1 min long 5-6 mins apart, so we went off home to wait for them to get closer. Had a warm shower when I got home, it was HEAVEN, and this is when I started freaking out about not being able to have my water birth because I knew that the water was going to be the best thing to soothe me.
Tried to watch a film to pass the time but my contractions were so intense. I bounced on my ball and hubby rubbed my back while I kept shouting at him to not fall asleep. At about 5am the contractions were unbearable, and every 4 mins, and one of them lasted for 2 minutes, I was in agony. Because she was facing up the pain was all in my back, it was unbelievable.
Back to the hospital, I was examined, 4cm yay! And I was on the gas and air, but still really struggling. I was told I was being admitted to the labour ward because the birthing centre that I wanted to use (which was upstairs) didn't open until 8am.
A midwife came and collected me, at this point I was really upset because I not only wasn't allowed my water birth, but I couldn't even use the birthing centre. I was really panicking and asked the midwife for pain relief. In my birth plan I'd put that I didn't want to be offered an epidural, and that if I asked for one I wanted my husband and the midwife to encourage me to do it without before agreeing. This totally went out of the window, midwife offered me an epidural and in a moment of weakness I said yes. Nobody tried to tell me I could do it without like I wanted. I wasn't in the right state of mind because I was so scared and I will regret that decision for the rest of my life.
Once the epi was in the pain relief was so amazing, I literally couldn't feel a thing. I was so excited that my baby was coming that I didn't even care that I'd gone against my own wishes. Spent the next few hours chatting to hubby and midwife. Got checked at 10am.... still 4cm.
They put me on the syntocin drip, again spent the next few hours doing nothing just being excited about the fact that I was in labour. Checked again at 3pm.... 6cm. Not great progress.
At this point a doctor came in and the possibility of a c-section came up for the first time. I cried my eyes out, but they reassured me they would let me go for a few more hours to see what happened. The doctor also 'stretched' me from 6 to 8cm. Eeeek, don't even want to think about how she did that.
By this point I was so tired and exhausted, I couldn't even think straight. At about 7pm I started getting a terrible pain in my left side. Apparently this was because she'd moved her head out of the 'engaged' position and to the side a bit. The epidural didn't take away that pain so I was back on the gas and air.
Checked at 8pm, still 8cm. Still not great progress. They were waiting on the doctor to come and see me. Doctor arrived at 9pm, examined me and said I was still 8cm, and the reason I wasn't dilating was because her head was no longer down.
She then spoke to me about a c-section. I was devastated, but so exhausted and in pain. Baby wasn't in distress but at this point I was scared that she might be soon as her head was being pushed in the wrong direction. The doctor was so lovely, she reassured me it was the best thing to do, and I reluctantly agreed.
Will continue this later, too much to write in one post!
At 2 days overdue I had no signs of labour at all, had a midwife appointment, she tried to do a sweep but couldn't because my cervix was so far back and closed still. I was SO upset, she booked me in for an induction at 12 days overdue, saying it was unlikely I'd go into labour within the next few days. Also, my baby that had been facing the right way for weeks and weeks, was now facing up!!
That day baby was very quiet and hardly moving, so at 6pm went into the hospital just for a check. Put on the monitor and baby's heartbeat was fine but she wasn't moving, and I was told that if it was still like that in an hour they'd induce me. 55 minutes later, with 5 minutes of monitoring left, she started kicking around like crazy, and I was sent home.
For the rest of the evening I was in so much pain, I really felt like she was beating me up from the inside, she was moving so much. Went to bed at 11pm very uncomfortable and fed up that labour was not going to happen any time soon.
At 1pm I was woken by my waters breaking!!! Woke my hubby and rang the hospital, they told me to wait half an hour, and if I was still wet that it was definitely my waters and to come into the hospital. Got to hospital at 2am and on the way there I got my first contraction.
Went into triage, the midwife confirmed that it was my waters and gave me a million leaflets to take home. They explained about what point my contractions should be when I came back or what to do if nothing happened in the next 24 hours (induction). She also told me that because my waters had broken I would not be allowed to have the water birth that I had been looking forward to for 9 months.
By this time my contractions were 1 min long 5-6 mins apart, so we went off home to wait for them to get closer. Had a warm shower when I got home, it was HEAVEN, and this is when I started freaking out about not being able to have my water birth because I knew that the water was going to be the best thing to soothe me.
Tried to watch a film to pass the time but my contractions were so intense. I bounced on my ball and hubby rubbed my back while I kept shouting at him to not fall asleep. At about 5am the contractions were unbearable, and every 4 mins, and one of them lasted for 2 minutes, I was in agony. Because she was facing up the pain was all in my back, it was unbelievable.
Back to the hospital, I was examined, 4cm yay! And I was on the gas and air, but still really struggling. I was told I was being admitted to the labour ward because the birthing centre that I wanted to use (which was upstairs) didn't open until 8am.
A midwife came and collected me, at this point I was really upset because I not only wasn't allowed my water birth, but I couldn't even use the birthing centre. I was really panicking and asked the midwife for pain relief. In my birth plan I'd put that I didn't want to be offered an epidural, and that if I asked for one I wanted my husband and the midwife to encourage me to do it without before agreeing. This totally went out of the window, midwife offered me an epidural and in a moment of weakness I said yes. Nobody tried to tell me I could do it without like I wanted. I wasn't in the right state of mind because I was so scared and I will regret that decision for the rest of my life.
Once the epi was in the pain relief was so amazing, I literally couldn't feel a thing. I was so excited that my baby was coming that I didn't even care that I'd gone against my own wishes. Spent the next few hours chatting to hubby and midwife. Got checked at 10am.... still 4cm.
They put me on the syntocin drip, again spent the next few hours doing nothing just being excited about the fact that I was in labour. Checked again at 3pm.... 6cm. Not great progress.
At this point a doctor came in and the possibility of a c-section came up for the first time. I cried my eyes out, but they reassured me they would let me go for a few more hours to see what happened. The doctor also 'stretched' me from 6 to 8cm. Eeeek, don't even want to think about how she did that.
By this point I was so tired and exhausted, I couldn't even think straight. At about 7pm I started getting a terrible pain in my left side. Apparently this was because she'd moved her head out of the 'engaged' position and to the side a bit. The epidural didn't take away that pain so I was back on the gas and air.
Checked at 8pm, still 8cm. Still not great progress. They were waiting on the doctor to come and see me. Doctor arrived at 9pm, examined me and said I was still 8cm, and the reason I wasn't dilating was because her head was no longer down.
She then spoke to me about a c-section. I was devastated, but so exhausted and in pain. Baby wasn't in distress but at this point I was scared that she might be soon as her head was being pushed in the wrong direction. The doctor was so lovely, she reassured me it was the best thing to do, and I reluctantly agreed.
Will continue this later, too much to write in one post!
I had an emergency c section due to failed induction and baby being distressed, I too suffered after with my emotions of the whole labour not going my way, but I also know I am so lucky we were both ok, it could of been a different story and some aren't so lucky. I think at the end of the day we put too much pressure on ourselves and slightly romance a little about child birth when really we don't have a clue what to expect when it's our first. Don't be too hard on yourself - congratulations cherish every moment when they are so little them, they grow so quick. Xx
