They said I can't have a homebirth :(

[Angel2Fire]

Ugh I'm so angry.

I really wanted a home-birth. I had a bad experience last time and am terrified of hospitals.

When I met my community midwife she gave me the impression I would be able to have a home-birth, but would have to talk to the consultant (who I have to be under because I've previously had a c-section!)

Today I saw the specialist mental health midwife and she said the community midwife doesnt know what shes talking about. She said theres no way the consultant will let me have a home-birth. She said I will need constant monitoring because I had a c-section last time. She said only 7 out of 10 women who have had a c-section manage to have a vaginal delivery. She said if I had a home-birth the midwife would have to sit with her hand on my stomach throughout labour to make sure I was contracting properly, and that no one would do that.

She spouted loads of statistics and made homebirthing sound really dangerous! She said they need me in hospital where they can monitor me and look after me.

I'm really upset. I feel like there's no point in even pushing for it now because everyone is just going to gang up on me and make me feel like I'm endangering my babies life! She also said that at 36 weeks I will be offered either an elective c-section or the chance to have a vaginal delivery.... So I get to have another c-section just because I've had one previously?! Is it just me or is that wrong in soooo many ways? In one breath they say a c-section is a major operation and in the next it feels like they dish them out like sweets!

Sorry for the rant I'm just really upset, and wondering if everything she said is true?

 

[disneyleanne]

I'm sorry you are going through this. You are being lied to! It is no-one else's decision but yours. It is your CHOICE to have your baby where you wish. It makes me so mad that women are lied to regarding their rights.

I have had 2 c-sections and I'm a doula so am fully aware of my rights. I have a meeting with the consultant in March. I want a hospital water birth but if they create a fuss I will be having a home birth.

Please try to get as much information as possible so you feel fully informed.

 

[xxxjessxxx]

SOrry to hear that hun.
My mum had to find her own midwife that would be willling to do a homebirth as many wouldn't. You should try looking for another, there are many who are trying to support homebirth now xx

 

[booflebump]

Have a look through homebirth.org.uk for VBAC homebirths - it is entirely possible to do and there is no need for the midwife to sit with her hand on you for the duration of your labour. Research, research, research and arm yourself with information - you are more than 'allowed' a homebirth if that's what you want

 

[ljo1984]

What a load of crap! Sounds like she's the one who doesn't know what she's on about not the community mw!! Of course you can have a vbac at home, defonatly look into it all and make your wishes known. Maybe get a letter out to head of midwifery to say this is the situation and that you intend to labour and birth at home and expect a mw to attend etc. Xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Petty much none of what she said is true. Have you sorted out your doula yet? I'm repeating myself here so I'll keep it short. There's no such thing as a consultant 'allowing' or not allowing you to give birth where you chose. They can advise but do you think they will arrest you of you don't comply?! Send the birth police round? You don't HAVE to have constant monitoring. You can decline anything and everything.

 

[Bournefree]

Ugh I'm so angry.

She also said that at 36 weeks I will be offered either an elective c-section or the chance to have a vaginal delivery.... So I get to have another c-section just because I've had one previously?! Is it just me or is that wrong in soooo many ways? In one breath they say a c-section is a major operation and in the next it feels like they dish them out like sweets!

Sorry for the rant I'm just really upset, and wondering if everything she said is true?

What I find appauling and amusing at the same time is the idea that you could have a "chance" to have a vaginal birth!! Your body and this baby will come out the normal route without interference.. the idea that becuase a consultant recommends a different route, your body and baby will understand this and not go into labour. this is studipidy it's self!

Have a look at the VBAC support thread in labour and birth. Make an informed choice and one that you are comfortable with. I know there are lots of women who would say "it doesn't matter how your baby gets here, just so long as it is healthy" but for me there are many other parts to being a healthy birth.. not least your recovery after major abdominal surgery and your own mental health - afterall deliving babies might be something that these people do everyday, but it is not an everyday event for you. It is unique and something you will remember for the rest your life.
Xx

 

[ChrissiK]

It's your right to have a home birth, they have the legal obligation to support you. Fight for it, if you really want it!
Get online support on home birthing / VBAC sites & good luck!

 

[Celesse]

https://www.babyandbump.com/labour-birth/658839-vbac-info-support.html <<VBAC support thread may be of interest.

I originally planned a HBAC with DS. I decided to change my plans because I didn't want the stress of not being fully supported by those caring for me and transferred my care to another hospital, where I was able to have a lovely labour. The midwives have a duty of care to attend you at home. If you have had a previous C-Section this will be against medical advise and they may tell you that you are "allowed" this and not "allowed" that, but ultimately the decision is yours.

 

[beccad]

They're probably concerned about the risk of uterine rupture. At the end of the day they want your birth experience to be as risk-free as possible, as with all births.

 

[Jims_Girl]

Gobsmacked!!!
I echo what all the other ladies have said!
Your baby, your body, your birth, your way!!

 

[Mervs Mum]

They're probably concerned about the risk of uterine rupture. At the end of the day they want your birth experience to be as risk-free as possible, as with all births.

Do you know what the risk of UR is and how it compares to other pregnancy and birth related risks? For example how is compares to say....cord prolapse? it's about context and deciding for yourself what is an acceptable risk.

A hospital birth isn't without risk....

https://www.aims.org.uk/Journal/Vol19No4/InformedConsentHospital.pdf

 

[Angel2Fire]

A hospital birth isn't without risk....

https://www.aims.org.uk/Journal/Vol19No4/InformedConsentHospital.pdf

That's just plain scary.... but seems to be true from a lot of what I've heard