Today I miss my baby

[Pixburgh29]

I've been watching pregnancy/gender reveal videos on youtube all morning. I couldn't tell you why, I know they make me sad. Seeing the joy that I was meant to experience. I had it all planned how to announce our pregnancy to our families, we were just waiting until I was 12 weeks along. We lost our baby in June and I've had 2 BFN's since. I've had AF for an entire month now and it's so depressing. I am so eager to try again but I haven't been able to because my body just won't cooperate. It's the most frustrating journey i've ever been on. I have PCOS so there is nothing normal about my cycles, i've been tossing around the idea of going to a fertility doctor and asking about chlomid. I know even though my baby is gone I'm still a mom, but my arms are empty and my heart just hurts. I've been praying to conceive again before my due date (january 25) in hopes that I won't just want to hide from the world that day. There's nothing to this post other than I feel like I can't talk to many people about my feelings on this, I'm not able to just come out and say "you know what? today i just miss my baby". So I come here.. because you know what? today i just miss my baby

 

[dinky]

I'm sorry for your loss! I feel like that too today. Today I got my first bfn, I've been testing daily to see when my levels drop and today finally they did. I thought I would be relieved so I could try again but all its done is confirm that my baby's gone I should be 13 weeks now and I've never known sadness like it. I'm lucky that I already have 2 girls and they should be taking my mind off things but there not, it's always there in the back of my mind it's all I think about! I love my girls to bits but I should be pregnant now expecting a baby we didn't even plan to have lol. I didn't want a 3rd and fell pregnant by surprise but now I've pictures 3 children in my life I need to have another! Like you I have pcos and tried 7 years for my 1st dd and I ended up conceiving her on clomid but my 2nd dd we fell pregnant naturally after 10 months of ttc. I also suffer from endometriosis. I had my d&c on 28th of august and I'm still waiting for my first af. I miss my baby today too

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I'm so sorry about your loss

I think about that too. I've had three losses in a row, all within a year, and I keep thinking that if I went full term with my first I would have given birth in June. If I had went full term with my second I would have given birth last month. If I were still pregnant with my third, I would be given its gender right about now. It hurts too because I have a friend who is pregnant with b/g twins (she has 3 kids already) and I feel like it is unfair. There is not a day that goes by that I don't miss my babies.