TTC #1, 20 something, and needing support!

[DaretoDream]

Hi guys, I wanted to start a thread for us trying for baby number 1, and 20 something. Also, i really wanted to have a support thread for those of us who do NOT have the support of our families!


I'm 24, dh is 25. We are in our 2nd month trying and just entered into the 2ww.

It's awful because i can't tell my mother- who flat out told me when i even mentioned in spring that we might think about having them- that she never wants to be a grandma- and to really seal the deal- that i would be a terrible mother.

My mother is someone who if she doesn't want something- she will take down your esteem so that you won't do whatever it is you were thinking about. She pretty much told me my whole life that i'm ugly, and no one would be interested in me. Nice. She also told me on my wedding day not to go through with it because in 6 months we'd be divorced. This sept we'll have been married 3 years. And going strong.

That's the kind of support i'm living with.

So needless to say, we are NOT telling her. Or my family until we are in the clear and we actually have conceived.

I want any other girls who have anything like that- whether it's from parents, in laws, sisters brothers friends - whatever- that are putting you down- to be able to join this thread and help support one another.

 

[sequeena]

Your mum sounds like an evil cow, I'm so sorry

I'm 21 (OH is 26) and we're ttc our 1st after 2 losses. This is our 19th cycle

I am very lucky at having the full support of my family x

 

[DaretoDream]

She is pretty evil. Problem is you can't tell her. When i was 14 i went up to her and we both sat down. I said 'mom, sometimes, when you make fun of me it really hurts me.' she said 'you know i'm just kidding' and i said 'sometimes i can't tell and i wish you didn't make fun of me when you're joking.' she got furious, stormed out- and didn't talk to me for a WEEK. I was a freshman in high school and that was already enough stress- and what was worse was, i remember standing in my room with the door open, and hearing her talking about me loudly downstairs- telling my family not to talk to me, and not to joke with me anymore because i can't take it. And them kind of ignoring me too.

I would sit in my room for hours and cry. And what was worse was at the end of that week of her doing that every single night- me hearing her downstairs talking about me, I apologized to HER- and she never ever apologized for it. to this day, 10 years later. I'll never tell her something bothers me again.

 

[sequeena]

She is pretty evil. Problem is you can't tell her. When i was 14 i went up to her and we both sat down. I said 'mom, sometimes, when you make fun of me it really hurts me.' she said 'you know i'm just kidding' and i said 'sometimes i can't tell and i wish you didn't make fun of me when you're joking.' she got furious, stormed out- and didn't talk to me for a WEEK. I was a freshman in high school and that was already enough stress- and what was worse was, i remember standing in my room with the door open, and hearing her talking about me loudly downstairs- telling my family not to talk to me, and not to joke with me anymore because i can't take it. And them kind of ignoring me too.

I would sit in my room for hours and cry. And what was worse was at the end of that week of her doing that every single night- me hearing her downstairs talking about me, I apologized to HER- and she never ever apologized for it. to this day, 10 years later. I'll never tell her something bothers me again.

Oh my God I went through sort of the same thing with my step father (though that was couple with mental/sexual abuse so is different). It's horrendous that she treated you that way!