Week old; Express or Formula

[Phantomshrimp]

Hello,

We had a healthy baby boy on Saturday morning and are settling in back home after my wife went through a very rough labor. It was a 2 day haul and she came out if it just shy of needing a transfusion. The reason I mention this is because I am worried she is not getting enough rest.

I let her decide how she wanted to feed our LO and she opted for Breast feeding. I told her I would support her no matter what she decided but after a tough few days I want to help her out with more than moral support.

LO's nappies contained Urates up until we introduced a bottle of formula. After speaking with a public nurse we were told that it would do no harm in "topping up" the breast feed with some formula. I jumped at the change and cried the whole way through feeding my son.

I was worried about introducing formula so soon, 5 days old, and hit these forums. Now I am even more worried. I don't want to harm my wife's chances of feeding or causing her to end up with Mastitis, but on the other hand I don't think she can physically be up for every feed at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice here please? Are we better sticking with formula and I take one or two feeds over the night? Or do we dump the formula and try expressing?

If my wife expresses, can that be stored in the fridge so I can do the night, or any other time she's resting, shift?

I'm sorry about all the questions, but if we do decide to express, when is the best time to start? Just after a feed of before?

I want my wife and son to both be as healthy as they can, while not pressuring my wife into anything. As mentioned, I would appreciate any and all advice.

Thank you for your time,
Paranoid 1st time Dad.

 

[luna_19]

If your wife wants to ebf she needs to provide all the milk, adding formula is only going to set her up to never quite have enough. These early days are crucial for establishing her supply. Even better than expressing can you take lo for a few hours and let her sleep and only bring him in for feeds? Evenings are common for cluster feeding which is so important so if you can support her by helpingher and baby find somewhere comfortable to settle in and nurse nurse nurse, bring her snacks, water. Just let her feed the baby. When baby is ready for some sleep you take him and let her sleep too. This time is very short so just help her as much as you can and ditch the formula

 

[luna_19]

Oh and as for your questions about expressing honestly it's a pain in the butt and will ne ore work.for.her. it could also cause an oversupply this early on which can lead to plugged ducts and possibly mastitis. IF SHE wants to express the easiest time is first thing in the morning while nursing on one side. Be aware that night time is a crucial time for establishing supply and night time milk is different than daytime milk and will help baby sleep. Please don't pressure her to do this even if it is coming from somewhere helpful, she is likely a bit of a mess from all the hormones. There are so many ways you can support her than taking over a feed

 

[Disneyfan88]

I exclusively express for several reasons, and it's quite a bit of work, even with my husband doing most of the washing of the various bottles and pump parts. We supplement with formula because my milk supply is low. If I was able to breastfeed, I'd ditch the pump in a heartbeat.

It has been said that a baby is able to extract milk from the breast a lot more effectively than a pump can. As PP indicated, pumping or formula feeding can potentially impact her supply at such an early stage. A few things that should help your wife's supply is plenty of rest, food (calories), and water in addition to frequent feeding. If you are able to watch your son so that your wife can rest/sleep when she's not feeding and bring him to her whenever he needs to eat (which will be frequently at this stage), that would be a big help to her. I don't breastfeed, but there is a position that she can utilize that would allow her to breastfeed while laying down in bed. I've heard that many women are able to sleep and breastfeed at the same time by doing this.

If your wife does decide to express, she should pump after your baby is finished feeding as your baby will likely get very frustrated if he is unable to extract milk from an empty breast while feeding. Also, if she does not empty the breast frequently enough (either via breastfeeding or pumping), it can 1) cause her body to reduce the amount of milk it produces and 2) lead to blocked ducts (which are painful and can progress to mastitis).

I hope your wife recovers quickly. I went through my own complications after having the baby, so I can sympathize with what she's going through.

 

[missbabes]

I've exclusively expressed since my son was 6 days old after many issues with breastfeeding. I had always wanted to breastfeed so I decided that expressing was the best thing for me. And now 11 months later I still think it was the best decision in the long run to give him the best possible start.

It is a lot of hard work, especially for the first few months. You're on about expressing at least once every 3-4 hours a day, including during the night. Gradually over time the gaps between expressing increase. I can honestly say that if my Husband hadn't been so supportive of me, and hadn't been able to help out then I more than likely would had given up and gone with formula feeds.

There's a lot of information about expressing on the exclusively pumping thread in the pinned section. I found it incredibly helpful in the early days.

 

[Bubble Girl]

Congrats on your new baby! The first few weeks with a new baby can be so difficult! Topping up shouldn't hurt if it's done very minimally but it is a slippery slope. With my first I had a rough birth and he wouldn't take to breastfeeding so I had to pump in the hopes that he would eventually get it. Pumping doesn't do the job of bub tho so I supplemented with formula and after a few months of combi feeding ended up fully formula fed. With my second she did take the breast and fed constantly at first! Now I realise why the pumping couldn't build my supply because it just wasn't done as often as breastfeeding is. She was literally feeding around every hour 24hrs a day to build my supply. Absolutely exhausting but necessary. If your wife really wants to exclusively breastfeed it really is best to try to get through that stage. It does get better! My best advice to you would be to try to learn some of your own settling techniques that are not feeding to settle bub and give your wife a break. If you find you really do need the formula top ups for a little while try to drop them when things get better and if that's not possible don't stress, combi feeding is still great and some breast milk is better than none

 

[Serenyx]

In answer to your questions about storing breast milk - my hospital informed me that you can safely store breast milk for up to 5 days in the fridge (it has to be at the back of the fridge though, not in the door) and for up to 6 months in the freezer. However they did also state that you should exclusively breast feed for the first 4-6 weeks so that the baby doesn't reject the breast in favour of a bottle.

 

[staralfur]

We opted to do top-ups and the occasional formula feed when my LO was a newborn, mostly due to some bad advice from doctors/nurses who said it wouldn't be an issue.

I suffered through mastitis twice in the first month (and three times since) and had to work reeeeally hard to build my supply back up in order to EBF once I was less tired. I couldn't tell you at this point whether all of that was worth it for the extra sleep, at the time I think it probably was, but there are definitely consequences to skipping feeds.

The advice is generally that if you're going to give a bottle of formula, your wife should be pumping at the same time. It really kind of defeats the purpose of not having to feed since pumping is (in my experience) much more of an ordeal than just feeding.

I would probably say look into safe co-sleeping, it was what worked best for us. The first week or so is an adjustment but I started to just drift off while my LO was feeding. Once she was a little bit older she learned to latch herself on and I would usually wake up for a split second and fall back asleep. I kicked myself for not trying it earlier and I completely credit it with saving my sanity and my breastfeeding relationship with my daughter.

 

[luna_19]

^^ yup cosleeping saved us, I wish we started sooner but was scared.

 

[Phantomshrimp]

Thank you so much for the replies everyone.

A full day of breast feeding today. The feeding sessions lasted an hour to two hours.

He seems to like a few breaks in between his banquet.

I am making sure my wife rests and if that means we are eating meals of questionable taste cooked a la phantomshrimp, then so be it

 

[staralfur]

You sound like you're doing a wonderful job.