What is recovery like without much support? (especially w other younglings)

[Guppy051708]

Our family is very far away and since they all work it may be a CS recovery without much help. DH can only take about 7 days off work. (my insurance enforces a 5 day stay after CS, so there goes most of it). I have two young children (currently 16months and 2.5 years). I plan on BFing. I never had a CS before so i dont know what to expect with recovery, taking care of a newborn plus my other two, and basically being on my own.
I am working on trying to get a family member up here (they live a 10 hour drive, one way, away). But im having trouble bc of their work and lack of funds. So i need to mentally prepare as if im not going to get the help and support i need PP but im trying my best to get it.

We cant afford child care and i dont know anyone well enough to trust them with my kids anyways (we havn't lived here all that long).

So do you have tips for recovering in this situation? Also, had bad is the pain and how long do i really have to take it easy for?( I wouldn't want to ruin anything or lengthen my recovery by doing something too soon)
so what is the truth about recovery and what can i expect as well as any advice for taking care of the kiddos w limited help. When DH isn't working he will be a terrific help (he works 9-5 job) but what about in the day?

 

[Malouka]

Hi!!

I have had a emergency c section. They say that recovery with a elective c section is quicker than with a emergency c section. This does make sense because usually with an emergency section you are already exhausted and absolutely not prepared. But I can tell you how I felt. I was in a lot of pain the first week, but it does get less every day. You will NOT be able to lift anything heavier than your newborn for the first six weeks and I do not recommend you to do this!! Your scar can rupture. Even if you feel like you can walk and do homework, do take it veryyy easy.

I wasnt able to walk well for 3 weeks or so, but that also had to do with my phobia for a c section. If you feel like you can walk DO SO. This is good for your blood circulation, but don't overdo it. Try not to do any cleaning around the house like dishes or loading dishwasher and laundry. Your husband can do this when he comes home from work for at least 1 month. You could cook, I did this after 2 weeks. Just dont carry anything heavy. Hopefully your children are a bit independent and do not need to be held. If you can try to teach them this from now on it will be a lot easier for you. I dont kno wwhat more to tell you, please ask if you would like to know anything else.

And good luck to you!!

 

[Malouka]

By the way. My husband did work part time and took off for about 3 weeks. It did help a lot. But I'm sure you can do it alone as well as long as he does all the other stuff around the house and wake up at night for your baby. It will be hard for him because he works, but he really has to. Nothing is worse than a overtired mother with a newborn and pain from a c section and 2 other kids running around. I really hope he will understand this. I was overtired, even if my husband did help me a lot and it can lead to severe depression. So please speak to your husband about it. It will be only for a month or so untill you feel much better. Working is different from staying at home with kids and a baby after a surgery. You are responsible for their health and safety and if you are overtired you cannot guarantee this.

 

[hulagirl]

Hi.
I had an emergency section last April after a 3 day labour.
Granted I had no other children but I was up having a shower and walkingv within 12 hr, hoovering within 3 days, shopping and pushing a buggy within 5 days and driving in two weeks. I stopped all painkillers within 3 days.
All of that was with an iinternl infection

Yes it was sore and sometimes I did have to slow down but all in all it was a fantastic recovery
My current MW said that I healed fantastically (I am expecting no2 in 9 weeks)
I never breastfed so I cant say how I would of been had I been.
For me I think being active helped
Good luck, hope it all goes well. X

 

[special_kala]

By day 5 i was feeling relatively ok and could have coped day to day with the girls, i left hospital after 24 hours though and no way rested the way i should have so days 3 and 4 were aweful for me but you should be better rested and healed anyway.

 

[chasemanzmum]

How I did it was have the older ones walk into the shower to wash (seeing as how they couldn't be lifted). Since my LOs love having a good bath (a shower was torture to them for a few weeks LOL). It was kind of rough for the first couple weeks. But we made it.

 

[lulu83]

I'm worried about this too! My 1st DD will be 14.5 months when DD2 gets here in early October. My husband has minimal time off...I have some family that can occasionally help, but not daily. I don't know how ill get dd1 in her crib for naptime..or explain to her why mommy can't pick her up she's just starting to walk now, which should help I think, but still...not lifting her is going to be virtually impossible if I'm not supposed to lift her for weeks. She can't get in and out of her crib by herself!

I did have a c section with dd1, and was pretty sore for 2-3 weeks. I was in the hospital m-f and I was able to do stairs etc by the time I got home, but sitting up and lifting anything was pretty painful. I hope to recover faster the 2nd time around..

 

[minties]

I've had an emergency, and then a scheduled. I recovered very well from the emergency section, and drove myself home from hospital on day 4. Sneezing and coughing hurt sharply, but daily activities were fine. I just moved slowly for a couple of weeks. I felt fine and back to myself by 2 weeks.

My planned section with Sophie was more painful, but still not too bad. No horror stories. I could pick Thomas up by squatting, grabbing him then straightening up. I did this first on day 3 while still in hospital.

I stayed 5 days with Sophie, as I felt I was a bit sore to resume household chores. Day 5 I was home and cooking lunch about 30 minutes later.

I was never told not to lift things for 6 weeks, which seems a bit far-fetched. 6 weeks is a very long time! I felt like my normal self 2 weeks post section with both kids.

Rolling in bed was hard, and sore. But daytime activities were fine. I got a bit sore if I did a lot, but nothing that would stop me doing washing or picking Thomas up. My OH didn't help all that much, but I didn't need it.

The hardest parts were just the normal new parent stuff...dividing time, being tired and breastfeeding etc.

 

[mojobear]

I had two "complicated" c secs only called that as I had a lot of scar tissue for them to get through as well as adhesions so basically they caused more internal bruising.

After a four day hospital stay with my first I came home and pretty much did light duties straight away and after 2 weeks felt pretty much normal. I did have support which was appreciated but mainly because of the tiredness.

With my second, again I had a four day stay but I also had a 15 month old that was not walking. This time it was definitely harder for me, because you cannot ask a 15 month old to understand why Mummy cannot pick her up. I also had staples this time round which I actually found quite painful as they pulled. I definitely did more and I took longer to heal. I was still pretty sore 3 months on (mainly when turning over too quick in bed). It took about 7 months before I was totally back to normal and I think it was because I pushed it more but that's just how it is sometimes and there has been no long term damage or problems.

If there was anyway you could get some help for week two then I think that will benefit you but if not you will be able to do it but just a bit slower.

Good Luck x

 

[alibaba24]

maybe I was very fortunate but I was on my feet after a couple days and back mucking out my horse after a few weeks I recovered very well and felt back to normal way before 6 weeks x

 

[Banshee]

I've had two c sections and had quite different experiences. After my first I was in a lot of pain for quite a while and had a scar rupture a week after my c section so really had to take things easy. I certainly didn't feel like driving before 6 weeks and even at about 3 weeks if I walked too far I would get sore and feel sick.
With my second c section I recovered much better. I was in a lot of pain to start with but had my 18 month old to look after so I guess I kinda got on with it. I actually picked ds1 up the first day I got back from hospital as I hadn't seen him in nearly a week and I couldn't stop myself when he came running over. DH had a couple of weeks off but after that I was basically on my own. I didn't really find much of a problem with lifting ds1 into his cot or high chair after a couple of weeks and was definitely sleeping on my tummy and driving at a month after the op.