What to do with toddler during a homebirth??

[MamaJo]

I'm planning on having a homebirth but my OH has just asked what we're going to do with DS1.. he'll be 18months by the time LO arrives and I really want him to be at home with us but also dont want anyone else there (like nosey grandparents) minding him.... and OH is worried he'll miss the birth while trying to keep DS1 entertained...

Anyone got ideas for solutions? I dont really kno what to do..

 

[Athomemum]

You could hire a doula as an extra support? I know a few mums who have had their toddlers around whilst giving birth. I intend for my 3 y/o to be there when I do and initially, it was just going to be OH and him but after giving it some thought, I'm having my aunt at the birth too as I want someone to be able to focus on DS1 fully and meet his needs whilst I'm in labour and someone for me to do the silly running about things like, getting me a drink, finding towels, bin bags etc so the MW can concentrate on the birthing part. But a doula would be great as extra support for you if you don't want family there, meaning your OH can look after your son and they can both join in when the baby is about to be born and the doula can help support you?

 

[special_kala]

My best friend came and watched River while i had River, she didnt come upstairs a all and my OH went and got River a few minutes after she was born.

Have you got any friends you could ask?

 

[Rebaby]

My best friend came and watched River while i had River, she didnt come upstairs a all and my OH went and got River a few minutes after she was born.

Have you got any friends you could ask?

Ditto. My best friend sat upstairs with Toby watching Cbeebies on the laptop with him while i had Rudy and they came straight down when he was born so Toby could meet his baby brother.

It all happened during the night so in theory we'd hoped my friend would just be at the birth but able to nip upstairs and settle Toby if he woke up, but he woke very early on in the proceedings and could tell something was going on so wasn't convinced about going back to sleep!

It was really important to me that no one come and 'take' Toby away to look after him (which is what my Mum had volunteered to do) as he'd never stayed away overnight with anyone at that point (in fact he still hasn't) and i felt it would be a bit much for him to go away and come back and discover an interloper had arrived!

I really wanted us to all be home together and my friend was able to be on stand by for us in the couple of weeks leading up to my EDD which is when we thought he'd be likely to arrive (and luckily was!)

 

[fides]

i plan to have my sister come watch my 14 month old up in the nursery while i'm in the birth pool - hoping that works. if she didn't live nearby, i'd probably go with a friend before ever considering grandparents.

 

[angiepie]

Have someone watch LO but stay in another room that you're not in, such as a sibling or friend and staying in LO's room. Or if you are friendly with neighbours they could keep LO next door.

You could hire a doula (or second doula if you have one for you) to do the job. A student doula is a good option because taking care of a LO is an easy task for a newbie (compared to birthing support). You could also post a job ad for a babysitter.

You can have that person stay in another room and let LO go between the two rooms if he wants.