When to have baby shower?

[notquite]

Obviously it's MUCH too early for me to have one now but I was just thinking about this.

Right now we are extremely financially unstable, as I was laid off from work about one month ago. My family doesn't know I'm pregnant yet, although they have already told me they will help as much as they can with everything, they know we're not having an easy time of things.

So of course I HOPE I am able to get a job! But it's already been a month, and once I start showing... well I would not be surprised if no one will hire me.

Enough of that, I am asking about baby showers!! I want to know how early is TOO early to reasonably have one? I think most women have it in their last month, is that correct? But I don't really want to wait til the last minute like that... because I really don't know what people are going to be able to afford to buy for us. So I want to have more than a couple weeks to be able to obtain whatever else we need, before baby arrives!

Do you think maybe at 7 months would be okay? Like in September, for me... I am due at the end of October.

Also, do you always have to have someone else plan the shower for you? Or would it be appropriate to plan it ourselves? We would rather have a co-ed shower/get together rather than the typical women only.

 

[Vickie]

All the showers I've attended have been done in the last month and have been planned by someone else. Is there anyone you can ask to throw you a shower?

 

[LousMom]

Not sure I'm qualified to answer this But.... from what I understand propoer ettiquette says that you have someone else throw your shower for you with their offering (like your mom, sister, best friends, etc...) bc you're really inviting people to spoil you and bring you lots of gifts for your little bundle. Now that doens't mean that you can't play a huge role behind the scenes, like planning, organizing it, etc.... with the host.

As far as when to have it, normally women have it in the 7th month. Depending on how many people come, you will get an almost unmanagable amount of gifts! For my shower with my daughter, we had to take 2 trips of stuff back to our house afterwards. Its better to give yourself like 2 months of time to sort thorugh it all, assemble things, wash clothes, set up, take back things that you got more than 1 of, etc... I would say if you're due 10/30 you have it the 1st week of September?

hope this helps!

 

[captain-ally]

My mom threw mine on March 1st and I'm due April 7th - but I kind of felt like that was pushing it a little. I was in the same boat - I got fired for being pregnant when I was about 2.5 months, then finally got another job at 3.5 months. Try applying at call centers - you get to sit all day and they probably won't care that you're pregnant. The turn over rate is so high, they only expect you to stay a couple months anyway

Lol, there were 6 of us that were pregnant at my call center. We all got hired around 3 months.

 

[notquite]

I guess when it gets closer to the time (AND after I tell her, haha) then I could have my mom do it.

I highly doubt I am going to get this unmanageable load of gifts like you are saying I just don't think people have the money right now! Also I can't imagine who would actually come to the shower.

But so what does everyone think of the co-ed shower idea?? We have a lot of friends and neighbors that are guys, that aren't necessarily married or otherwise committed to a female.

 

[diva4180]

We are having a co-ed shower, my mom's throwing it in the middle of April, I'll be about 32 weeks.

 

[captain-ally]

I didn't think anyone would come to mine either, lol. Was I ever wrong... It was all women but coed would have been fun too.

 

[xdaniellex]

Hi Im Planning Mine, And Inviting All Mine And My Partners Mates =] An Then A Separate One For Family =]
And Ours Is Goin To Be Co-Ed =]
Also Financially I Know How You Feel - My Fella Got Made Redundant In Jan, An Im About To Lose my Job Cos Im Pregnant - God Knows What Im Goin To Do!!!!! But My Family (Especially Grandparents) Have Been Great An Bought All The Big Stuff Like Crib, Moses Basket Ect =] x x

 

[Dukechick]

We're having a co-ed shower too!!

My best friend and my MIL appearently are putting it together. I did mention that I would like it around 30 - 32 weeks or so. Never want to leave it too late, just INCASE something happens a little early!!

 

[overcomer79]

I imagine mine will be about June from my family and probably July from my inlaws. I would typically say the seventh month. I did have a friend that had hers in april when she was due in August. They felt it would be more comfortable as she wouldn't be so tired.

 

[Jelly Bean]

Baby shower gifts aren't usually "big" items, like bassinettes or prams, especially in this economy...you should keep this in mind. I got clothes and toys.

I'd buy what I need for baby (new or used) now and try to make the baby shower be about celebrating the baby, not as just an excuse for getting gifts.

(That sounded way preachy and I didn't mean to preach. It's just that I don't want you to be disappointed )

 

[firegal]

I've been invited to a shower being held about 3 weeks before the baby's due! It's co-ed, and it's been organise by the mum-to-be. Personally, I think have it when you want, organise it yourself if you want to, invite who you want.... you're pregnant, who are other people to tell you what to do??

 

[mumtobe25]

Hiya, a lot of my family have been getting bits for baby everytime they go out..so didnt think it was right to have a baby shower and also i kind of think if you throw it yourself its like asking for presents so we are having a bye bye bump party but as everyone has got stuff i will be writing on there no prezzies

but its completely up to you im due in aug but will prob be having it june (end of )

 

[FierceAngel]

i had mine at begg of feb i was about 32 weeks as i was expected to deliver early (med reasons)

one of my closest friends and my mum planned mine was great xxx

 

[notquite]

Hmm well now I just feel odd about the whole concept!!!

I don't know about the big ticket items deal. My best friend had her baby in Nov, I was talking with her about it and she said she got a TON of stuff, including expensive items! Also I am going to a shower later this month, and looking at her registry you can see what items have already been purchased, and she is going to be receiving some pricey gifts as well.

I already feel weird about essentially asking for gifts... but... well, if I don't get any, I'm going to be kind of screwed. I have already begun to add items to a registry, and I am really being sensible about it, not asking for ridiculously expensive stuff... but some items are pretty expensive even if you get the cheapest one! So, I am hoping that maybe my family will pull through for me on this one.

 

[Sherileigh]

Usually people here do it after the baby's born! BUT it sounds pretty common to have them before as well....I'm sure lots of people will come and you'd be surprised what they can get you. People can find some pretty good deals for baby stuff!

 

[starryeye31]

My oldest step daughter had a baby shower planned by her inlaws and I was really hoping she would get stuff she needed as she didnt have much for her baby at all and all she got was about 6 outfits , some socks , and a blanket . I didnt get to go to her shower because it was the day after I had my gallbladder removed , but I bought her a diaper bag , and a few outfits , I also gave her my bassinet . Now my younger step daughter is having a baby shower thrown by her ex boyfriends mom , the ex isnt even the babys dad so I thought it was weird for her to be throwing her a shower but im sure she will be getting tons of nice things from these people , and her exs sister is giving her a nice baby swing , her friends mom gave her the bassinet she used for her daughter and she is going mad buying baby girl clothes and bought her a baby bath tub today . Ive never had a shower for any of my kiddos , I never knew who to invite and I never wanted to ask for handouts , I was also afraid No one would show up . have your mom throw you a shower and help her plan it ,maybe your realitives can help you with the big ticket items , if not there are lots of resale stores that have stuff thats like new and pretty cheap . Good luck hun

 

[LoveTypeThing]

I am having 2 showers; one in Connecticut where all of my family is and the other in Florida where my husband and I live, and where all of his family is. For my shower in Connecticut, I am having it very early, I will only be 4 and a half months. This is for many reasons; I was able to find a cheap flight if I go earlier rather than later, I do not know whether I will feel up to traveling much later, and the timing for me to miss work is better than waiting another month or two. For the one here I plan to have it when I am about 6 months, because I want to have it early enough that I will still feel up to shopping afterwards and will have enough time to buy everything that I will still need. I know that many people say it should be around 8 months, but for me earlier works better, and anyone that disagrees with it I am happy for them to not show up. For the one here, we are doing co-ed, and we are keeping it very small, so my husband and I feel comfortable planning it ourselves, only we are not calling it a shower so much as a celebration with close friends and family. Good luck!

 

[tasha41]

Had my first baby shower January 31, delivered March 13, due date was March 22 So 7 months, IMO, is fine. I know I had mine before because I'm young (19) and it was my family, they wanted to help me out as much as they could with the shower. 2 of my aunts and one cousin planned this for me. I got stuff like my stroller, exersaucer, bouncy chair, an expensive thermometer, clothes, a couple toys, a baby carrier, etc.

And people are throwing me 2 more showers May 3 & May 24... because of the size of the 2 families and all my friends there was no way one would work out & if you don't invite someone they get offended and you knoww..

 

[Mynx]

I've thought about having a baby shower but I'd feel wierd expecting people to turn up with gifts for the baby. I never had one for my DD and tbh I knew I didnt really want to have one for this baby.
I think we'll probably just have a bit of a party with friends/family and if they want to bring something for the baby, that's fine. I wont be putting together a baby registry or anything like that and if I get asked what gifts we'd like then I'll probably suggest vouchers or something. My OH will be moving in with us in August so we'll probably have the party then to mark the occasion