When will I get that BFP?!

[zoefromsussex]

Okay so I'm now on my 3rd cycle of ttc and I'm getting impatient already! I kind of feel guilty moaning on here because so many of you have been trying much longer than me but I just needed to vent my frustrations! I'm 32 but I keep reading all this info about fertility declining even after 30...it panics me that we won't conceive again.
Also, I saw my doctor to ask about tests because I'm paranoid that I'm not ovulation (I'm getting af but no other signs whatsoever) He told me to try the home tests first but he also said these would only confirm a surge of LH and not whether I'd actually ovulated.
My husband doesn't understant why I get so frustrated. He thinks it will 'all happen when the time's right'...

 

[cazza22]

It is frustrating huny you just have to keep at it!! We have been trying for 3 years now & 3 MC's later we still dont have our bubs . I am hopefull though, and we are now under a fertility specialist, so i am hoping the next time we do get our BFP that with the proper care i will go full term & get my healthy baba xxxx Dont give up hope hun Gud Luck ;-) xxxxxx lov Caz xxxxx

 

[vickyd]

We all get impatient and end up driving our men up the wall...Just today i called my hubby 6 times at work to make sure he comes home early so that we can bd!! Im pretty sure that he wont be able to perfom after all the pressure i put on him so i think we should all try and be more patient and when it happens it happens!!!

 

[zoefromsussex]

Lol those poor blokes! Its hard not to get annoyed with them though when you just want to conceive again! Also, my husband doesn't seem to grasp that I can only get pregnant right before ovulation. I've explained so many times but he seems to think it can happen any old day of the month! Grrrr...! x

 

[vickyd]

Like we dont have enough to worry about with the whole ov prediction story!!!!
Last month my hub was too tired to bd on the two most important dates, this month its the world cup GRRRRRRR!!!!

 

[heart tree]

Zoe, the best way to track ovulation is to chart your temperatures. I thought I ovulated much earlier than I did until I saw the pattern on my temp chart. Once I realized when I ovulated, I got pregnant. I chart my temp in conjunction with testing my LH surge. When I get the surge, I BD as much as possible for the next several days. When my temperature rises, I can confirm that I ovulated. My temp rising and my positive OPK almost always coincide with one another. I don't really have other symptoms of ovulation, so I would be lost without them. If after a few months you don't get a BFP or you don't see a clear shift in your temps that says you've ovulated, there are things the doctor can do. He can check your progesterone levels and can do an ultrasound to see if you are ovulating. If you aren't there are medications you can try. If you are ovulating and you don't have any ewcm, you might think about trying pre-seed. It mimics ewcm and helps the sperm get to their destination.

I know how frustrating it is month after month to get AF. Most men don't have the urgency that we have because they don't have as much pressure on their fertility. Have you explained to your husband your fears and frustrations? Have you acknowledged your grief about your loss with him? This might help.

My husband also uses the term "when the time is right." I just try to think to myself every month that the time IS right, and it IS right now. That helps me get through each month with hope that I'll be pregnant very soon.

 

[zoefromsussex]

Vickyd: my husband's the same! Too tired on the most important days and then he wonders why I'm not pregnant yet!!! Now its the world cup!
Heartree: yes we've been quite fortunate in being able to deal with our loss as we both find it easy to show our feelings. If anything, he took it harder than I did. We're also very fortunate in that we already have our little girl (she'll be 4 in July)
Thanks for the tip about preseed though as I've been interested in trying that x

 

[africaqueen]

3mths is not long in ttc terms hun ;-)
I have been ttc for almost 5 yrs in total and after 1 loss, still trying... im 30 next yr so hope il still be fertile in my thirties ;-)

Sadly, its the one thing in life we have no control over and thats the frustrating part. I want to be a mummy more than anything on earth and it just dosent seem to be happening for me. Hang in there. Its early days.

Heart tree- How are u? not seen u around for a while but i have mostly been posting in diet and fitness and one tubers xxx

 

[heart tree]

Zoe, the first month I tried pre-seed, I got pregnant. Give it a go! It can't hurt. If you have questions about it, please let me know.

Vicky, my husband is the same way. As you know, I often ovulate on a Monday. We're both often too tired. It is so frustrating! And my DH had a huge issue about performance anxiety. I don't even tell him anymore when I think I'm ovulating. It has definitely helped!

Africaqueen, I'm ok hon. I've mostly been posting in the June tester thread. I wondered where you've been. I see you are 8dpo! TWW again. I'm 3dpo. Not feeling a thing at this point. I'm praying it is both of our months!

I'm praying it is everyone's month this cycle!!! Good luck ladies!

 

[africaqueen]

Zoe, the first month I tried pre-seed, I got pregnant. Give it a go! It can't hurt. If you have questions about it, please let me know.

Vicky, my husband is the same way. As you know, I often ovulate on a Monday. We're both often too tired. It is so frustrating! And my DH had a huge issue about performance anxiety. I don't even tell him anymore when I think I'm ovulating. It has definitely helped!

Africaqueen, I'm ok hon. I've mostly been posting in the June tester thread. I wondered where you've been. I see you are 8dpo! TWW again. I'm 3dpo. Not feeling a thing at this point. I'm praying it is both of our months!

I'm praying it is everyone's month this cycle!!! Good luck ladies!

Oooh im so excited this mth! i have had a ton of symptoms so far... well im hoping they are symptoms! lol. Lots of lotion cm, exhaustion, headache etc. Im going to test in a few days. Good luck to us both! i pray we end up in 1st tri together

xxx

 

[BabyQ]

Lol those poor blokes! Its hard not to get annoyed with them though when you just want to conceive again! Also, my husband doesn't seem to grasp that I can only get pregnant right before ovulation. I've explained so many times but he seems to think it can happen any old day of the month! Grrrr...! x

LOL, mine's the same, he says that that's a "load of old rubbish and of COURSE you can get pregnant every day of the month!" . Good luck TTC hun, it's very frustrating xxx

 

[zoefromsussex]

Ooh thats reassuring about the preseed! Think we'll definitely give that a try.
I know that 3 months ttc isn't long in the grand scheme of things but it seems it to me because my daughter was conceived the first time after stopping contraception and our son (who we lost on 22nd March after a tfmr) was conceived within 3 months. I think I'd expected the pregnancy to be plain sailing like it was the first time but there were problems right from the start and I think its made me lose confidence. I now can't imagine being pregnant ever again!
Anyway, I guess if it doesn't happen, its just not meant to be and I do count my blessings for all that I've got.
I'm hoping like anything that you all get your good news very soon x

 

[Round2]

Hi Zoe,

I have a similar situation and I just wanted to share with you. I have a daughter who is 3.5 and she was conceived the very first month of trying. My second pregnancy that ended with with MMC I conceived after 4 months. As each day goes by, I keep counting the months apart my children will be. It breaks my heart that I haven't been able to provide a sibling for my little girl. She asks nearly every day when we will have a baby. Now we're on our 3rd month of trying and I just feel like it's never going to happen. I thank God for my daughter every day, but I feel so guilty because instead of enjoying her, I'm obsessing about TTC.

I have to say though, listening to other women on these boards gives me hope. There are so many strong women here. Many of them have endured so much more than I have and they all sound so positive. If they can keep it together, I know that I can.

 

[zoefromsussex]

Round2, oh your situation is almost exactly the same as mine then, apart from the circumstances of our losses, as I had a tfmr rather than a mc.
Try not to feel guilty that you haven't provided a sibling for your little girl as I'm sure you give her so much love that she's not bothered! Maybe we're delaying things for ourselves by being so conscious of ttc? I know exactly what you mean about some of the women on here suffering so much; its heartbreaking. When we went into hospital to have our son induced/the tfmr, there was a book of messages from other parents who'd been helped by the SANDS charity (still births & neo natal deaths) and some of the poor parents had lost lots of babies. I'm certain you'll get the baby you deserve so stay positive! x

 

[Melly]

Hi Zoe,

i know the feeling!! my hubby seems to think you can get pregnant any time in the cycle, it took me showing him in the book how narrow the window is before he understood, until then he thought i was peeing on OPK's for the sake of it and wasting money on them

we managed to concieve in the first proper month of trying, which was a massive shock because quite honestly i didnt think i couldnt have babies at all, unfortunatly that ended December last year when i had an mc.

just noticed you're quite local to me (well sort of), i live in Nutfield near Redhill