Controled crying this is bloody hard!!

[loopy_lou]

Well harriets still awake it's been suggested I put her to bed and only go in every 10 min were on 2nd lot of 10 min and she's screaming it's so hard I want to go in and pick her up

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

I don't think it's recommended to use this method before 6 months, is it?

 

[special_kala]

You should not do controlled crying before 6months.

Why do you feel you need to?

 

[loopy_lou]

Don't know tried just about everything else to get her to sleep since 7pm today

 

[loopy_lou]

Were have got her up now last night she was up till 1am ;(

 

[special_kala]

Is she actually tired? She is so young atm controlled crying isn't the answer. We have had nights where river has screamed until 12 especially when she wad younger we just held her till she dropped off

 

[ellie]

i'd do what you feel. at this age, i'd say she needs you and can't learn to sleep by controlled crying .... its tough though when they wont sleep! if she is really upset i dont know how likely she would be to actually go to sleep anyway?
at that age we used to spend ages bouncing, shhing (super loudly sometimes both of us one in each ear and that was all that would work), white noise, swaddling, music, feeding, putting him in his swing or hammock .... eventually something would work. Has she got colic? early teething? wind? too hot? and as kala says, is she tired? when LO was younger sometimes he wouldnt be sleepy till very late, even now he doesnt go to sleep till 8.30-9pm, he's just not ready before then.

 

[smokey]

I find the idea of CC more stressfull then spending hours trying to get him to sleep.
Have you tried other methods or tactics as said by the others it isnt reccomended before 6 months although with some babies just nothing else will work, I thought I was getting to that point with Brian as he just snaps and can go hysterical with no warning.
But im finding that the more I learn his sleepy cues the easier im finding it to get him to sleep although it was touch and go for a little bit tonight till I realised he was hording a few more big burps

 

[special_kala]

to me controlled crying doesn't really accomplish much, all the babies learn is you won't go to them if they feelvthey need you and how to fall asleep through sheer exhaustion

 

[LankyDoodle]

Isabella is 2 months and we have to hold her to sleep, then she will sleep for a good long time.

At this stage, children are forming strong attachments with their parents, and controlled crying, I believe, is not the answer. It's the one theory I studied at uni that has really stuck with me into parenthood because it makes such perfect sense.

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

I think you risk creating extra problems like windiness (amongst loads of other reasons why I wouldn't leave my LO to cry but that's not relevant) I know even if my 13 month old has a big cry about something she brings up lots of wind after.
Don't feel that your LO needs to be taught to 'self settle' - just do whatever works, be it rocking, feeding, playing music, cuddling, singing....

 

[ellie]

Its bloody hard when nothign seems to work, just keep reminding yourself that it will pass and she wont be like this forever. If youre anything like me you'll be getting pressure form all sides to 'just let her cry' that seems to be everyones advice! but really you know thats not the answer as it felt so bad for you. She will sleep, you'll find a way that works for you all.

 

[Kitty23]

We've done controlled crying since day one but maybe go in every 5 minutes instead of every 10? Also we found that Poppy loves to be swaddled and pushed right to the side of the moses basket then I roll up a few blankets and use the to kind of squash her into the side so she feels really secure. Have you tried a dummy to? When they cry after 5 mins we go and put their dummies back in and pat their bums while saying " shhh" seems to work for us xxx

 

[bonniebluesky]

No help, just tons of hugs

It's awful when they won't sleep and get so upset.

 

[smokey]

I do think CC has its place but not realy till about age 4-5 when a child knows what they are doing and possibly using crying just for attention and to get thier own way when they dont want to go to bed yet.

 

[special_kala]

Exactly ellie. If you need to rock her to slerp, feed her to sleep or cuddle her to sleep do it. People say your making a rod for your own back but I think all your doing is making a happy table trusting baby. We used to rock river to sleep and now she does down fine by herself. Cc breaks a very important trust in the relationship and just seems counter productive to me

 

[loopy_lou]

Thanks guys she's yawning and rubbing her eyes fighting sleep for 2 hours wehave tried everything else to get her to sleep hugs, songs, rocking ;(

We have had one night when she slept threw and a few where she's dropped off and stayed asleep for a few hours (could count the m on one hand). Fed up would just like some sleep!

 

[Kitty23]

Thanks guys she's yawning and rubbing her eyes fighting sleep for 2 hours wehave tried everything else to get her to sleep hugs, songs, rocking ;(

We have had one night when she slept threw and a few where she's dropped off and stayed asleep (could count the m on one hand). Fed up would just like some sleep!

Seems like she's overtired, my two get like this they used to get overstimulated by the tv being on and feeding them in the living room with the lights on, so now we feed them at 7pm in our bedroom in the dark no talking nice and relaxing and then pop them into bed maybe a little bedtime routine would work like bath, massage then bed?xxx

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

At that age they can't deliberately fight sleep, although it does seem like it sometimes, I remember! Something is clearly stopping her dropping off? Is she in any pain, wind etc? Is it warm where you are? That can cause us all problems going off to sleep.

 

[special_kala]

River didn't sleep through until she was 5 months I don't think. I'm afraid it comes with being s mummy though don't forget it will get better