How does your OH react?

[countrygirl86]

Hi Ladies,

Just wondering how your OHs respond to all the highs and lows and general trying? At first my DH just wanted to see what happened but now after 9 months he's starting to think there might be something to planning when to BD! Also we haven't told anyone we are trying so I feel bad telling him everything, which is what brought me here!

 

[foquita]

I always tried not to weigh mine down with all of the nitty gritty and still try to do that to a certain extent but he is very supportive it's more for my own reasons that I hold stuff about ewcm etc back, I wouldn't ever want him to feel like I am using him for sex and I worry that if I put pressure on him when i think I'm ovulating he will feel a bit used and abused that's my own paranoia about his feelings though, I just never want sex to become a chore for us

I don't know what I would do without this site though, I would have no one to bore with all the gory details

 

[hello_kitty_t]

My DH would rather not know. He is grossed out by the words period & ovulation, so you can imagine how he'd react to more detailed info. I am almost 30 and we want two children so I feel like we need to do what we can to help things happen. (Using OPK, BBT, etc.) I think he'd prefer a NTNP approach, but he hasn't actually said that. We are fine as long as I don't talk about lady parts, lol. Lately I have been spotting and I have talked to him about it like when I am upset and he does his best to listen, but he doesn't really have much to comment on it. I think some guys are just like that. It's not that they don't care, they just don't have the desire to learn about the technical stuff. Feel lucky if your man does!

 

[foquita]

hello_kitty_t, i think ALL men would prefer a NTNP approach they think that all you have to do is shag whenever you fancy it hehe xxxx

 

[SamiAurora]

You are in good company here huni!

My OH is really excited and supportive, but sometimes is nice to talk to other ladies who know what you're going through.

 

[foquita]

i agree sami, at the end of the day even a sympathetic and supportive male can only understand so much

 

[Countrygirl13]

My OH takes an interest but it's funny sometimes the things he does and doesn't know. i bought a TTC book (so like us!) and he's been dipping in to it. As a bio teacher i do try and tell him a bit more about hormones and things so he knows whats going on.
I guess we're both reaching the stage now where we need to think about getting tested and changing diet and lifestyle more.

 

[SamiAurora]

i agree sami, at the end of the day even a sympathetic and supportive male can only understand so much

so true!

 

[lisap2008]

My husband is very laid back about the whole process , he said he came to terms years ago with the fact that he might never have a child of his own , and this sort of thing is what pushes me to try and make it happen still.

 

[juliann]

I am only one month in but I try not to tell him too much. He doesn't know anything about hormones, cycle, timing to bd, etc. I do 60 second "education" bursts when opportunities arise so that he won't be overwhelmed but can slowly become more informed.

I hate to tell him when we need to BD.. but I think I might start giving him a one week warning so at least he will know it is a priority.

 

[tribble]

My OH is very, very involved. From the beginning he's played a big role in planning and tracking. My whole thing was kind of, we both want a kid, I'm not doing the dirty work by myself. We take turns each month tracking what days we should BD, etc. I use an iPad app to track and he has a copy in his iPad that he uses. Obviously I update more, with symptoms etc. He even keeps track of how much preseed and OPK's we have left and orders more when we get low

I love him to bits, he's the best. I know I'll have no problem with him changing his share of dirty diapers! Lol

 

[laurabe]

My OH used to say that it was in my head to much and that i had to relax and let nature take its course but with all these hospital appointments he realises its not all in my head and he is very supportive.

 

[XfairyhopesX]

I try not too tell oh anything angel, only if we havnt dtd for a few days and ov is close i will say errr we need to tonight mate... which i hate doing, makes it not enjoyable. The reason is we only have sex around once / twice a wk usually so its no fair that just because its baby time its on my call so i try to not push it... which makes ttc harder!!! xx

 

[CdnEquestrian]

At first we were just NTNP, and then when nothing happened and we moved to TTC, he was very laid back about the whole thing and didn't think we needed to really TRY. Now that it's been a long while, he realizes that there is more to making a baby than a drunken 'I-forgot-the-birth-control' night (both of his kids were conceived this way. lol) and has gotten pretty involved. I tell him EVERYTHING.

He's a good sport about it when I talk about cervical mucus, temping, taking vitamins and meds, and he even bought me cucumbers because he read somewhere that eating cucumbers improves fertility. lol I love him dearly.

We talked tonight and I asked him if he was indifferent about things (he was ok with not having another child, or having another one...but left it up to me, what I wanted) or if he wanted another LO and was excited. He said that he sometimes sees little girls in the grocery store and misses when his girls were small and that he's excited. It melted my heart a bit. lol

LOVE my DH so much. No idea what I would do without him. He jokes that i'm only with him for his premium sperm, and that I use him, but we're so in love that it's ridiculous. lol We have a very easy, comfortable relationship. I don't want it to ever change.

 

[SamiAurora]

I am only one month in but I try not to tell him too much. He doesn't know anything about hormones, cycle, timing to bd, etc. I do 60 second "education" bursts when opportunities arise so that he won't be overwhelmed but can slowly become more informed.

I hate to tell him when we need to BD.. but I think I might start giving him a one week warning so at least he will know it is a priority.

I love that idea! Sounds like that would work on most males! Hehe!

 

[ELR]

I try and give my husband the bare minimum of what he needs to know. Pretty sure we are in for a long struggle and I don't want to upset him or get him down or anythingn more than I have to.

 

[meandmrb2011]

I am only one month in but I try not to tell him too much. He doesn't know anything about hormones, cycle, timing to bd, etc. I do 60 second "education" bursts when opportunities arise so that he won't be overwhelmed but can slowly become more informed.

I hate to tell him when we need to BD.. but I think I might start giving him a one week warning so at least he will know it is a priority.

Hi there ,

I do the same with my DH , i am his first gf & now wife so he has NOOO idea about anything to do with women , i didn't even have AF or pms before he left for Korea (nov 30th '11) as i had been on depo shot. So , i casually bring up a few bits here & there . I have told him that i am now on a 24day cycle and that i should ovualte when i go and see him (mar23-apr6) and that i have beeen checking my cp & cm . He seems cool with it , he even wanted to get in on the act when i go see him. I think that is also partly to do with the fact we have been apart for 4 months !!!! At least he will be happy to as much as possible when i am there