Hi everyone I wasn't sure if this was the right place to post this or not, tried searching on the net for support groups etc but failed, I recently had my 19week scan and they found that it showed no sign of development in the right arm just after the elbow, I'm so upset and confused I really don't know what to do ,next week I have an appointment so they can run by my options , I've been lying in bed crying for the last 3days, I'm just worried as I know if I go ahead that it's going to be life changing not only for me and my husband but my 2year old child too, but im also sad if i dont go ahead with my pregancy ... just wanting to know if you have been in my situation and what you decided to do and how did it effect you. Thank you in advanced.
19week scan showing no arm
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starlight29
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Hi 
I wanted to reply my mum has the same thing shes 50 now has never been classed as disabled she has a full and happy life. She learned to write with her left hand it has never stopped her doing anything.
If you think about it my mum says shes never missed it cause she never had it kind of makes sense you cant miss what you didnt have in the first place kids at school used to ask me what was wrong with my mums arm I had to think about it cause I actually forget most of the time think the only thing she cant do is open a jar but she has a jar spanner for that lol.
I also happen to know a girl whos 12 with it as well I know her mum same thing no reason for it shes a dancer costs her mum a fortune in ballet lessons. She has a bit more of her arm mainly her hand thats missing but again she just takes it as normal to her.
My mum drives too because its her right arm she does all the gear stick etc with her left hand anyway so she learnt to drive at 17 has driven ever since shes a manager at a shop too.
Hope this helps if you want to ask anything feel free
Huge hug
Starlight
I wanted to reply my mum has the same thing shes 50 now has never been classed as disabled she has a full and happy life. She learned to write with her left hand it has never stopped her doing anything.
If you think about it my mum says shes never missed it cause she never had it kind of makes sense you cant miss what you didnt have in the first place kids at school used to ask me what was wrong with my mums arm I had to think about it cause I actually forget most of the time think the only thing she cant do is open a jar but she has a jar spanner for that lol.
I also happen to know a girl whos 12 with it as well I know her mum same thing no reason for it shes a dancer costs her mum a fortune in ballet lessons. She has a bit more of her arm mainly her hand thats missing but again she just takes it as normal to her.
My mum drives too because its her right arm she does all the gear stick etc with her left hand anyway so she learnt to drive at 17 has driven ever since shes a manager at a shop too.
Hope this helps if you want to ask anything feel free
Huge hug
Starlight
Oh 
So sorry to hear! As you go to a follow up appointment, I'd inquire if this could be associated with any other defects/syndromes (especially mental). Otherwise, if it's just the arm, I agree with the previous poster, it won't really be life-changing: Your LO will never have known any different, and with the exception of very few things (like competitive baseball), will lead a totally normal life. They even have prostheses now that look absolutely lifelike, should your LO desire to wear one eventually.
So sorry to hear! As you go to a follow up appointment, I'd inquire if this could be associated with any other defects/syndromes (especially mental). Otherwise, if it's just the arm, I agree with the previous poster, it won't really be life-changing: Your LO will never have known any different, and with the exception of very few things (like competitive baseball), will lead a totally normal life. They even have prostheses now that look absolutely lifelike, should your LO desire to wear one eventually.
Islas_mummy
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Just look the the CBeebies presenter Cerrie Burnell who doesn't have half an arm! She's a wonderful successful beautiful working mother of one child! Nothing has stopped her doing anything and is a brilliant role model to young people.
It must be a huge shock but your child would learn to do everything with one arm! As starlight pointed out, you cant miss something you've never had!
Goodluck and keep strong xxx
It must be a huge shock but your child would learn to do everything with one arm! As starlight pointed out, you cant miss something you've never had!
Goodluck and keep strong xxx
happysaurus
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I am so sorry to read that. I taught a wee girl who was born with only one arm - the other hadn't developed because the umbilical cord wrapped around it and cut off the circulation. It didn't bother her at all and I never witnessed or heard about any bullying because of it. She was lively, bright, mischievous and just a perfect little girl - everything a parent would hope for in their child. And she would skelp her brothers hard enough if the mood took her. This was pre-school age but she drew as well as any of the other kids.
Foogirl
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I don't know where you are with this, but to add a perspective from a parent of a child who is disabled, of course it is going to be life changing. It is easy to focus on how it will be for the child but as parents there are challenges we face which shouldn't go unnoticed.
Our daughter has cerebral palsy. We do face daily challenges, but you know what? You just learn different ways of doing things. Our daughters disability is physical, which does make it easier to deal with, but we do have to be creative to have her enjoy life as other children do. It can be done, it just takes some thinking about. Whatever route you choose, it will be the right one for your family, there is support out there for you (and in here) when you need it.
Our daughter has cerebral palsy. We do face daily challenges, but you know what? You just learn different ways of doing things. Our daughters disability is physical, which does make it easier to deal with, but we do have to be creative to have her enjoy life as other children do. It can be done, it just takes some thinking about. Whatever route you choose, it will be the right one for your family, there is support out there for you (and in here) when you need it.
