22 long months....how do you cope??

[lucy_smith]

How do you cope? Whilst all this ttc is going on, our wedding is on hold, buying a flat is on hold and all because we need to save as much as we can incase we need help!

How do you manage ? I feel like my life is out of my control ...

 

[red_head]

We're 4 years in. You just have to keep on going. We put things on hold at first but it just makes everything so much harder and more painful. You can't live like that, sadly waiting for something which may not happen (sorry if that's sounds harsh but it was said to me and I needed to hear it). I've just started clomid but I've also been offered a fantastic opportunity career wise which starts in exactly 9 months. When I applied (in March) I was pregnant so thought I'd be fine to start, but that wasn't meant to be. I've accepted the place, because life has to keep going. If we are lucky enough that this finally works then I will change things if and when that happens. But in terms of coping; not so well! I've had a full on break down at times. But that's why it's so important to have the distractions and normality outside this process.
Fingers crossed for you

 

[BelleNuit]

Hey we are at the 20 month mark and I also put my life on hold quite a bit so far. I didn't go on a hiking trip last summer because I just "knew" I would be pregnant by then, I've skipped out on several parties (because I didn't want to be around people who were pregnant), I've passed over job opportunities thinking that it would be best... just in case I got pregnant. Well I've come to realize that after 20 months, and 24 cycles of doing just that... waiting and planning and doing everything I can to get pregnant, and putting my life on hold while I'm at it, that I've got nothing to show for it.

I have no idea how long this will take, or if we will ever have a baby. But I'm done putting my life on hold in the meantime. So I've actually just taken the plunge and have applied on a new job! I know we will have to take a break from ttc for a few months if I get it, and I'm okay with that!

I'll say that the thing that has kept me sane, is taking a break every now and then. I'm on a break cycle right now. Its glorious!

 

[lupinerainbow]

9 years in and you don't have a choice but to cope really as the years go by the pain gets worse.

 

[givemeabump17]

Hi, I'm 17 months in. Tbh this was the thought that just occured to me. Putting everything on hold to ttc. Career opportunities, holidays, even every day events like job courses or gathering. I'll try to clear most activities around the few days I'll be ovulating so that I can 'make the most out of' my fertile days.
These days I also schedule them around my doctor's visit, blood tests, SA, collecting meds, ultrasounds etc. I'm even thinking on putting my holiday on hold in Dec because Ill want to attempt ivf if iui doesn't work out the next few months. I'm not happy about this of course but I also know that theres no way out because the only option is to carry on. hopefully some day I'll look back and think how silly i was to worry pointlessly and waste my life fretting over this. Fingers crossed.

PS: Af came on my first clomid cycle today and Im trying hard to be ok. on to cycle 2!

 

[red_head]

Imagine if we all end up with little brats after all this!!! Haha!! X

 

[givemeabump17]

haha. that will be a dream come true! I hope we won't end up complaining about sleepless nights after that. Some of my older friends told me to enjoy the freedom while I still can which is strangely a comforting advice to me!

 

[jwilly]

We are on cycle 25. Honestly, I stopped putting life on hold and that has helped me the most. Having something to look forward to other than a pregnancy has been huge. For a while it felt like the only thing that would make me happy was a baby. Now I have been trying to enjoy other big life events- new house, new car, vacations, anniversaries. I can't say that it gets any easier, but if nothing else, it helps the time pass a little quicker.

 

[LouisianaLady]

22 months in! I had a baby 11 years ago when I was 21 with my daughters father. Now, I am married to the love of my life, who has no children, and we never thought this would be a problem. EVERYONE, including my sister who tried once, is pregnant around me. Insurance doesn't cover fertility, so I feel like it is hopeless because we just do not have the funds right now to get assistance. All I know so far is I have low progesterone, low FSH and high AMH. I am 31. I am so devasted and defeated, it seems it doesn't get easier. Taking a break for a month or two helps me cope. I try to keep myself busy and not fixate on it. My hubby is so defeated and I feel like it is my fault somehow. Good luck on your journey!