2nd mc, awaiting FS appointmennt, TTC or take a break??!!

[lauraemily17]

Hi Ladies

I'm having a real inner battle with myself at the moment and really need some advice!!

After 8 month TTC got my first BFP in April which ended in a MC at 6+5. 2 months later got my second BFP which also ended in a MC 2 weeks ago.

I saw my DR who has now referred me to a fertility specialist due to the time TTC and 2 mcs. He told us to stop TTC now until we see the FS in 5 weeks. Had first lot of bloods taken and waiting for an appoitnemnt to come through.

I was ok about waiting as I didn't ovualte the month after my mc last time so assumed I prob wouldn't this month so figured we weren't really missing a chance.

Well, going on my CBFM, temps, CM I am sure I am going to ovulate in the next fews days and now really don't know what to do!!

Pros for TTC....

1. I am sure I have an auto-immune prob causing the mcs and now have baby aspirin. I have done loads of research all of which say taking baby aspirin massively increases the chances of a healthy pregnancy

2. I have only had highs on my monitor, no lows this month so I think my estrogen has remained high so my lining should be good enough

3. I have had loads of fertile cm without actually trying to make it i.e. drinking loads of grapefruit juice, surely that's a sign I'm more fertile than usual!!

4. You're more likely ot be fertile after a mc and I may miss a good opportunity and being nearly 30 these get less and less!!

Cons to TTC....

1. My lining isn't thick enough becuase of the mc bleeding and I a fertilised eggy can't implant properly and I have another very early mc (chemical)

2. I am wrong about my auto-immune probs get pregnant and have another mc as the baby aspirin won't help

3. I have another mc which harms my body actually reducing my chances further for a future healthy pregnancy

4. I go through the stress of another 2 week wait rather than giving myself a break emotionally!!

My DH and I are absolutely desperate to have a baby, we know of 3 people who gave birth yesterday and although we are pleased for them it's so heartbreaking for us that we're still waiting! I think in reality the chances of us getting pregnant again so soon are slim therefore what am I worrying about but the above cons are really playing on my mind!

Sorry for the essay!! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!

 

[Mon_n_john]

I can't really give you any advice as I'm no dr. but knowing me, I would probably TTC again because I am so impatient. I have gotten pregnant immediately after a mc and went on to have another mc.

I also tried to get pregnant last month after a mc and it didn't work. Once I got my period I could see why it didn't work, my period was really weird and clotty for a few days. Certainly not a good environment for a little embryo. This month with a fresh cycle I feel I am giving my little potential embryo the best chance possible.

I think it's sound medical advice to wait but understand the desperation to try. If you do try and you do get pregnant and God forbid have a mc promise yourself you'll be ok with it. If you know you won't be OK then don't try for your peace of mind. Hope that helps!

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Hi, Im in the same boat as yourself. I've had two miscarriages in a row this year and this week have just had blood taken. they are going to run teh whole works of tests they have said and it will take 6-8 weeks for results..I nearly died with shock it takes that long. Only then will I get an appointment with a specialist and they may need to run more tests, argh!Im depserate to find out whats wrong and start trying again but I seriously cant consider it until I find outs whats going wrong. After my first miscarriage I started taking a low dose aspirin and I thought it was working wonders as it got me to 10 weeks this time but I still miscarried.
Its a difficult decision for you but realistically it may save you more heartache if you wait until your results come back. Taking an aspirin dosent always work as I discovered.
I've had a period since my miscarriage it arrived approx 35 days after my D&C. My concern now is that Im on cycle day 27 now and still havent ovulated. Im hoping this is a delayed reaction after the D&C and will rectify itself, Im worried sick that I will now have problems ovulating.
Good luck whatever you decide x

 

[Mon_n_john]

I'm getting blood tests tomorrow too. Mine should be back within 2 weeks, I'm SO nervous!

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Thats not so bad that your results should be back within two weeks.. that seems realistic. I feel like this whole year has revolved around ttc and miscarrying and now with my results taking so long and possibly having to be repeated I feel like I'll be lucky to even be ttc again this year..sigh, I'm very impatient.
Do you suspect anything in particular to be the problem? I just keep thinking its low progesterone with me

 

[Mon_n_john]

Well, for the longest time I thought I had low prog. and though that is still possible my dr. is starting to have doubts. I had 3 mcs before having my last son. With him I was put on prog. and baby asprin and I was able to carry him till term.

Then last month I had another mc. After that one I had a prog. test done at 7 DPO. If my prog. was the problem that result should have been low but instead it was normal which has confused me. So my doc now thinks I may have some immune issues and that is what I am being tested for. The technical name is APA, RIP, and I forget the other (it's 3 tests).

Kind of hoping they'll find something they can treat or I'm back to just treating for low prog. I have had chromosomal testing too and that was all fine, thank God.

Have you been tested for anything or are these your first blood tests? Do you happen to know which tests are being done?

 

[lauraemily17]

Thanks for the advice ladies. I'm so sorry for your losses.

In the end we went for kindof NTNP, ovulated yesterday but only BD on Sunday night but we didn't use pre seed or use an optimal baby making position with legs up in the air afterwards. We figures this way it was very unlikely (we have had to go all out on the trying bit to get pregnant both times) if it does happen now it'll be down to fate!!

I actually handled the second mc quite well compared to the first but it was really early which prob helped and I had a bad feeling from the start. On the day my mc started I had a dream the night before that I took a test, it was negative and started bledding later that day and that is exactly what happened!!

I'm not sure how quickly I'lll get my blood results and don't know exactly what's being tested, they took 4 viles though so I guess quite a bit!! My Dr ordered them now so they had the results in time for my appointment which I'm still waiting for. I presume I'll still have to have more. I'm preparing myself for lots of proding and poking over the next few months It'll be worth it though to get our rainbow baby.

I'm starting to accept now we're in it for the long haul whereas before I was only thinking from month to month but I can't keep putting my life on hold. I too am very impatient but I'm learning not to be!

Let me know how you get on with your appointments. It would be to share our experiences and maybe we can learn from each other. xxx

 

[Mon_n_john]

Great plan Laura! Hey I just noticed that we are 1 day off in our cycles, I am CD 13 today. I'm still waiting to ovulate today or tomorrow!

 

[lauraemily17]

I hope it's a lucky month for you! Do you temp?

Have you found you're any more fertile after having a mc? I use a fertility monitor and always used to ovulate on the second peak day, usualy cd15 but since my first mc the 2months I've ovluated have been on the first peak day and cd13!

It's nice to know we can get pregnant quicker now after waiting 8 months the first time, just wish it could be with sticky beannie!

 

[Mon_n_john]

I do temp! I can't say I'm any more fertile after a mc but then again, I get pregnant pretty easily usually (within 3 months) but it's staying pregnant that is the problem.

 

[lauraemily17]

Hi Mom_n_John and Justkeeptrying.

Thought I'd resurrect this thread to share how we're getting on!!

Mom_n_john - I saw your imunnology results. I'm so so pleased for you! You couldn't have asked for better results really. I've read loads about NK cells, there's also lots in my book and with treatment the chances of a succesful pregnancy increase to 85% and I think it's about a 15% chance without treatment. When do you start treatment and can you TTC straight away on it?

I found out yesterday I could go private for some tests however today in the post I got a referral from a Recurrent Miscarriage Clinic at my local hospital. I never knew one had one. In it was some paperwork for some more blood tests and to my complete shock they include testing for auto-immune conditions!!!! I thought I was going to have such a battle convincing a Dr to give me them!! The only down side is that the results take about 8 weeks and we have to stop TTC. I think I could get them quicker privately however they need to be done between cd1 & 4 which is next week so too late to get a referral.

I'm still pleased though that we're finally going somewhere! I never thought I'd be excited for AF to arrive and to have a blood tests!!

 

[Mon_n_john]

Thank you Laura! I am relieved to hear that. I just ordered Dr. Beer's book myself but it won't be here until next week so I am trying to learn as much as I can off the internet. Treatment is super expensive but apparently very effective. How wonderful it feels to know the answers I so desperately sought!

My Dr. hasn't told me to stop TTC and honestly at this point I am in the 2WW so what is done is done. If I get a BFP this cycle I will call her immediately and hopefully they can treat me quickly. I think most women start the treatment once they get a BFP but they have had very good results with women starting treatment prior too. I guess I'll get all my questions answered on my next appt. which is August 15th at 9:30 a.m. I can't wait!

And I am SO happy to hear you got your refferal! That is awesome that all your tests are covered, you are so lucky. I know it's a long wait for your results but trust me, so worth it. You'll have great peace of mind afterwards.

I will keep you updated as I get more info. Thanks again for your reasuring words!

 

[molski]

Hi girlys, so glad i hav sum1 to talk to who completely understands!! I hav had two mcs this yr, one in march an one in may, both at 6 weeks! Ive just discovered wer 5+2 and we cannot believe it! So scared to b excited, im on pregnacare and bby aspirin. Jopefully 3rd time lucky! Xxx. I wudnt wait personally, u hear of people havin 12 ,14 mcs. Sometimes u just hav ta kp tryin. However im so scared. Theyv bukd me in fa a scan on 17th, so that will b after the previous 6 week danger period. I really hope i dont hav to go thru that again, it wud kill me! Xx if it happens again this tym i think il put it off for a few months or even mayb a yr. Ive got endemetriosis, cysts an had to hav ops on my cervix and whom in 09 but app the mcs rnt anythin ta do with these . . . . . . .

Just gota wait an c, gud luck girls xx il kp use updated