5th Miscarriage 04/26/2016 (twins); D&C or Natural m/c, which one you would U choose

[nevergivingup]

Hi ladies, well after 3 years & 3 m/c's of TTC God blessed me with a baby boy in Feb 2013. I took a 3 year hiatus so I can finish my nursing career to become a Registered Nurse. Well that 3 years was the most stress free baby free baby dancing since TTC son. But that time had came in Feb. 2016 when it was time to try again since my graduation for nursing school is less than a month away.

We got pregnant the 2nd cycle!! EXCITED!!! Ecstatic!!! Ready to give my son his brother/sister! We did everything right! Went to our 1st u/s and was told we were pregnant with twins!!!!

Well we were over the moon until yesterday 04/26/2016, went for my 2nd u/s and was told neither baby is living...

My DH was gutted, I wanted to scream inside and go run and hide but I've been down this road 3 times before so I knew the rain would start pouring once I got home and realized I lost everything...

So here I am now with the two babies still inside of me just waiting for my body to take its course and hopefully miscarry on its own. Bc the last thing I want to go through again is another D&C. It was the worst experience I ever encountered and I really don't want to encounter it again.

I cried n cried all last night....I just want to be normal and be able to carry my babies without Miscarrying, without being afraid!!! I'm so tired of going through this!! What am I doing wrong!!!!

I just want to be normal...

 

[cupcake23]

I am so sorry for your losses 😞

You are doing nothing wrong! I'm a midwife and I've found myself looking at everything in a clinical way, wondering why my body after 2 healthy babies could not carry a much wanted child, trying to find answers where there were none, it's heartbreaking and soul destroying knowing something so precious has left you. I hope you can find some answers and that your body is kind to you so that you don't have to go through with a d&c (would medical management be an option?)

xxx

 

[nevergivingup]

I am so sorry for your losses 😞

You are doing nothing wrong! I'm a midwife and I've found myself looking at everything in a clinical way, wondering why my body after 2 healthy babies could not carry a much wanted child, trying to find answers where there were none, it's heartbreaking and soul destroying knowing something so precious has left you. I hope you can find some answers and that your body is kind to you so that you don't have to go through with a d&c (would medical management be an option?)

xxx

Thanks Cupcake for replying

I hope my body miscarry on its own too especially since my schooling is coming to an end and I dont have time in my schedule to schedule a D&C.

I asked my doctor yesterday about the medicine to help my body out and he said their office don't offer medicine for miscarrying twins..
So it's between D&C and wait for my body to miscarry.

Since you are a midwife, what are your thoughts on D&C?

I did it once before but I'm cautious about it prolonging my ovulation and thinning my lining and etc.

 

[cupcake23]

I'm sorry the medical route is not an option, at this gestation I don't understand why it's not.

It's a difficult one, I went through the the medical route but that was for an incomplete miscarriage, my body had down most of the job. I wouldn't be patient enough to wait for a natural mc, I was offered a 'wait & see' approach and for me I couldn't carry my incomplete mc around... So if I was in your position a d&c is something I would seriously consider it. Talk to your doctor so that you can be reassured, my clinical experiance is limited on d&c, only had to witness them as a student many years ago, but I can tell you I've seen plenty of notes with women who have had multiple d&c and have no problems carrying a child afterwards, I happily see them giving birth xxx

 

[nevergivingup]

I'm sorry the medical route is not an option, at this gestation I don't understand why it's not.

It's a difficult one, I went through the the medical route but that was for an incomplete miscarriage, my body had down most of the job. I wouldn't be patient enough to wait for a natural mc, I was offered a 'wait & see' approach and for me I couldn't carry my incomplete mc around... So if I was in your position a d&c is something I would seriously consider it. Talk to your doctor so that you can be reassured, my clinical experiance is limited on d&c, only had to witness them as a student many years ago, but I can tell you I've seen plenty of notes with women who have had multiple d&c and have no problems carrying a child afterwards, I happily see them giving birth xxx

THANK YOU SO MUCH for your thoughts and Experience!! Bc I really hate carrying them around prolonging my chance to just try again.

How long did it take your body to even start trying to miscarry on its own?

 

[cupcake23]

That's exactly how I felt, I started bleeding on the Sunday, seen in EPU on the Monday with a threatened mc, scanned on the Friday to be told it was an incomplete mc, was given the option to wait and see but being in the profession I asked to have misoprostol and it was duly given, I only bled for a further day, my experience was overall good using misoprostol... I'm still waiting for af to start ttc.

It's been the worst experience of my life, I was adamant I wouldn't try again so now that I have I'm very apprehensive, made worse by waiting for af.

Once again I'm sorry you have to go through this again, you are in my prayers xxx

 

[nevergivingup]

O my gosh!!

I'm just seeing that you just had an miscarriage last month!!!
I'm the one that should be saying "SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS AS WELL!!" I'm so sorry I missed that!!

That's the downfall of it all....the fear! I told my DH I'm so tired of these m/c's that a part of me want to just stop Bc we'll never know the outcome! But I want to give my baby a sibling and my DH another child.


Thanks for being so kind I am so praying for you too!!!! Especially that AF come!! One time I was so impatient waiting on AF to come after my first m/c that I didn't and got pregnant again but lost it again... Guess it wasn't my time then either. But that's not everyone case Bc my friend just had a m/c and didn't wait for her AF and now she's 6 months pregnant.

Well I'm praying for you and I that we'll get what we long for soon!!

 

[cupcake23]

Thank you so much for your kind words, funnily enough af arrived today 😀 I also didn't wait before ttc so I was very anxious that if I did fall pregnant it would end up with another mc, my body not being ready.. so I'm happy that af has arrived and I can't start ttc again.

Wishing you all the best xxx

 

[LoraLoo]

I'm so sorry hun. I had medical management with my losses so can't understand why they won't iffer you it even with twins. Personally if given the options you have i would opt to miscarry naturally, what a awful decision to make though 😔 thinking of you x

 

[ReadynWaiting]

First off I'm so very sorry for your loss. Rmc are frustrating and heartbreaking.
I had my 1st d and c last feb against my better judgement but the dr said it was my best option and I just wanted to move on. The experience was devastating but my body ovulated 3 weeks later followed by af. 2 pregnancies later another MMC detected but I was determined to let my body handle things on its own as I didn't want to go through the whole d and process again.
My body took 5 weeks to start on its own which was emotionally exhausting knowing I was carrying my deteriorating baby inside of me. The day the bleeding started it came in full force which I though must have been because I was around 13 weeks. I started passing clots that turned in to gushing blood. Little did I know I was hemorrhaging. My husband had to call an ambulance and I was rushed to the hospital. I ended up losing more than half of my blood and my blood pressure dropped dangerously low. I was rushed in for a d and c, the one thing I was trying to avoid.
I'm not trying to scare you and I hate when people give their dramatic stories to get a reaction. I read all kinds of stuff that led me to avoid the d and c but no where did I read this was a possibility. God forbid i have to make this decision again but if it comes down to it I will choose a d and c before I go through that again.
Whatever you decide I hope you have a gentle recovery.