aymz1983
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sorry. I cannot think of an appropriate thread title, I've just got so much swirling around my head regarding my daughter, who is 7 (8 in November)
I've booked her a doctor appointment for Monday morning for issues regarding her ways of dealing with anger, sadness and boredom, her behaviour and some other issues.
Basically, she has started to pick herself until she bleeds. A few weeks ago, she would scratch her arm when she couldn't get her own way, or when she was being told off. Of course, putting it down to attention seeking we tried to get her to stop it.
Over the past few weeks, what were miniscule dots on her arm have now turned into 5 huge spots, which she picks on an almost daily basis. She does this out of sight of us, as opposed to the beginning when it was in front of us. She picks until she bleeds and the spots just do not have time to heal. The might start scabbing over but then off that comes. They are like mini craters in her arm. She's been picking them at school as she's been bored, she says she has no one to play with at lunch although I do not know how much of this is true as she does have friends which she plays with.
She will pick them at home when she is angry because we've told her off, or because she can't have her own way. usually she storms off upstairs and ends up doing it there. I've tried putting plasters over them, but mysteriously the plasters find a way to come off in such a way I have to take the whole lot off. We've tried making agreements with her, saying if she doesn't pick for x amount we'll get her the one thing she wants, and she's been agreeable, but the next day it is square one.
Her behaviour over the past few months/year has been challenging at times, which seems to be increasing. I'm not sure how much is just normal behaviour, I don't know if she's reaching puberty early, although this worries me as a) her age and b) I can barely cope with her moods now let alone when she'll get her periods. I like to think I can be a patient, calm person, except when she's got one on her, I can feel myself getting angrier and angrier. She shouts, and she never listens, I'll ask her to do something and she'll ignore me, or start then not finish and I have to keep asking her, which causes arguments because then i'm 'picking' on her, she whinges and cries when she can't have her own way, and sometimes she'll go to smack us or something, although that's not all the time. Getting her to do anything that she doesn't want to do is like getting blood out of a stone, and just takes forever because she drags it out as long as she can, usually until arguments get worse and she's sent upstairs or she storms off herself.
It's hard to explain in words because there is no way to get just how depressing it can be with her sometimes. Today for example, I've had to really breathe and calm myself because I felt like I could have really smacked her one. I sometimes end up saying horrid things to her, and she goes off and sulks...she doesn't cry anymore if I do that which makes me feel even worse, because I worry I'm doing irreparable damage to our relationship, even though I always apologise after. I'm sick of telling her off for things, even when she's not in a mood she can be just acting silly. in Sainsburys i had to keep telling ehr to get off the trolley, or she makes loud noises not unlike those my toddler makes, or she's running around...
I'm trying really hard (but failing!) not to cry as I write this. I love my daughter more than life itself, when she is in a good mood we get along so well, we have cuddles and she is my wonderful, perfect little girl, who'll do painting, and drawing and crafts, or sit and put clothes on her teddies. Its just the moods, the whinging, the crying, the not listening, the pulling faces and disrespect when she's being told off, the silliness....I don't know what to do when she's like it, it's getting to the point when i really cannot cope with her like it and I just feel like walking away.
How horrible does that sound? Does anyone have any similar experiences with their children daughters in particular? Is it just mine?
If you've managed to get this far, then thank you for reading
I've booked her a doctor appointment for Monday morning for issues regarding her ways of dealing with anger, sadness and boredom, her behaviour and some other issues.
Basically, she has started to pick herself until she bleeds. A few weeks ago, she would scratch her arm when she couldn't get her own way, or when she was being told off. Of course, putting it down to attention seeking we tried to get her to stop it.
Over the past few weeks, what were miniscule dots on her arm have now turned into 5 huge spots, which she picks on an almost daily basis. She does this out of sight of us, as opposed to the beginning when it was in front of us. She picks until she bleeds and the spots just do not have time to heal. The might start scabbing over but then off that comes. They are like mini craters in her arm. She's been picking them at school as she's been bored, she says she has no one to play with at lunch although I do not know how much of this is true as she does have friends which she plays with.
She will pick them at home when she is angry because we've told her off, or because she can't have her own way. usually she storms off upstairs and ends up doing it there. I've tried putting plasters over them, but mysteriously the plasters find a way to come off in such a way I have to take the whole lot off. We've tried making agreements with her, saying if she doesn't pick for x amount we'll get her the one thing she wants, and she's been agreeable, but the next day it is square one.
Her behaviour over the past few months/year has been challenging at times, which seems to be increasing. I'm not sure how much is just normal behaviour, I don't know if she's reaching puberty early, although this worries me as a) her age and b) I can barely cope with her moods now let alone when she'll get her periods. I like to think I can be a patient, calm person, except when she's got one on her, I can feel myself getting angrier and angrier. She shouts, and she never listens, I'll ask her to do something and she'll ignore me, or start then not finish and I have to keep asking her, which causes arguments because then i'm 'picking' on her, she whinges and cries when she can't have her own way, and sometimes she'll go to smack us or something, although that's not all the time. Getting her to do anything that she doesn't want to do is like getting blood out of a stone, and just takes forever because she drags it out as long as she can, usually until arguments get worse and she's sent upstairs or she storms off herself.
It's hard to explain in words because there is no way to get just how depressing it can be with her sometimes. Today for example, I've had to really breathe and calm myself because I felt like I could have really smacked her one. I sometimes end up saying horrid things to her, and she goes off and sulks...she doesn't cry anymore if I do that which makes me feel even worse, because I worry I'm doing irreparable damage to our relationship, even though I always apologise after. I'm sick of telling her off for things, even when she's not in a mood she can be just acting silly. in Sainsburys i had to keep telling ehr to get off the trolley, or she makes loud noises not unlike those my toddler makes, or she's running around...
I'm trying really hard (but failing!) not to cry as I write this. I love my daughter more than life itself, when she is in a good mood we get along so well, we have cuddles and she is my wonderful, perfect little girl, who'll do painting, and drawing and crafts, or sit and put clothes on her teddies. Its just the moods, the whinging, the crying, the not listening, the pulling faces and disrespect when she's being told off, the silliness....I don't know what to do when she's like it, it's getting to the point when i really cannot cope with her like it and I just feel like walking away.
How horrible does that sound? Does anyone have any similar experiences with their children daughters in particular? Is it just mine?
If you've managed to get this far, then thank you for reading
