A bit angry with DH

[Snowball]

It might just be hormones so somebody please tell me if I'm being unreasonable.

When I found out I was pregnant we agreed not to tell anyone until after our 12 weeks scan. He knows I have been terrified of having a miscarriage (I've been so paranoid it's unreal) so I didn't want to say anything. The only people I have told are the other forum which I host on and obviously everyone here.

Anyway I was talking to him today and he slipped into the conversation that he told his mum a week ago!!! I was shocked because I saw her last weekend and she didn't say a word about it to me, infact she asked me if I was on a diet?!?! I know I'm probably over reacting but I just didn't want anyone to know yet and I thought he'd respect that and I'm upset that I sat infront of her openly lieing about why I was feeling sick when she knew all along.

I guess I just thought that when we told people it would be together.........

 

[Jenny]

Its understandable that you're upset because you both had said you wouldn't tell anyone about it but I think you shouldn't be too mad at him. He probably just needed to tell someone about it and his mom, who is the closest to him was a safe bet for him. It sounds like she wasen't going to say anything as she didn't bring it up with you at all so he probably told her to keep it hush hush until you all were ready.

 

[HappyMom]

Oh I am sorry. I had a miscarriage in November and this time around I decided till we were sure everything was okay before telling anyone and that is what Dh wanted also. But after a week and a half I couldn't help telling but Dh seemed to be okay with the fact that I did even though we said we would wait.

 

[Samantha675]

At least it was just his mom. My father ran around telling EVERYONE. So I didn't get much of a chance to tell people. He literally shouted it from my front porch. Oh and I was only 5 weeks at the time.

 

[Samo]

i'm sure his intentions weren't to hurt your feelings, it is his mother after all and it may have just been hard for him to bundle up such a secret inside of him. However, he must have told her not to tell anyone (which shows he was indeed thinking of you and the hopes of keeping it a secret until you are ready to tell) because his Mother acted like she didn't know a thing! She can keep a secret for sure. It is a lucky thing that the person he chose to confide his secret with is very trustworthy because she could very well have told everyone she knows!

Don't be too upset with your DH afterall, you have said yourself that you 'spilled the beans' on your pregnancy to the forums on the internet. How hard would it be for you to keep such a secret if you didn't have us on the internet to confide with? I'm sure the secret was too much to keep inside of him that he had to tell SOMEONE!

 

[codiontour]

you are justified at being upset imho!

 

[cparks1]

I know how you feel. There was a time when I thought I was pregnant, but we got a false positive on the test. Turned out I wasn't at that time and we had already told everyone. I was devasted. Then this time around, I really am pregnant and we both said to one another that we were only going to tell our parents. Well, he went overboard and told people so in return I did too (but only certian ones). I kept it a secret for a little over a month. I felt okay about it because my family doctor did the pregnancy test so I figured if anyone would be right, it would be them.

 

[Gabi]

It's understandable for you to be upset.

At least she can keep a secret. Shame I can also understand his view. It's next to impossible to keep quiet at times lol.
With us, the two LAST people to find out will be my mom and my DH's sister because neither of them can or will keep quiet.
We've had to tell a couple of people in confidence. But these people know that this pregnancy is strictly on a need to know basis.

Just a few more days. That's what I keep telling myself!

 

[Tezzy]

At least it was just his mom. My father ran around telling EVERYONE. So I didn't get much of a chance to tell people. He literally shouted it from my front porch. Oh and I was only 5 weeks at the time.

that sounds like my mother in law when i was pg with rhys, i was about 7 weeks and everybody knew!!

 

[Ann-Marie]

Mine was the other way, he didn't want to tell anyone until 12 weeks, and I wanted to tell everyone ( which I did ). I was worried that he wasn't excited, I'd have been happier if he did want to tell people. Maybe he was just too excited not to tell his Mum, which I think is quite sweet, but he shouldn't have kept it from you, and made his Mum lie to you about knowing.....

 

[StephBabyboo]

Same as above... My DP didn't want anyone to know but i want to shout it from the rooftops!!

Had to tell me Boss because i push washing machines around and MUSTN'T do that anymore and people started guessing cos i quit smoking and started eating lots of fruit! then its just spread around!

He's not happy about it, as i'm sure you arn't but i think its sweet too, i'd be a lot happier if my DP wanted to shout it from the rooftops too!

 

[Snowball]

Sorry for bumping this thread and I might just be paraniod but I'm sure he's just told his friend who is visiting tonight. I asked him not too for another couple of weeks, just till I have my twelve week scan. However, I have just been to the toilet and you know when you go out of the room and come back in and the conversation suddenly stops and no one really knows what to say. His friend quite obviously avoided looking at me and then after about 30 seconds they jumpily started another conversation, then left the room.

If he has I'm going to be a bit annoyed because that is the second person, without my permission and even after I've begged him not too. I couldn't cope with everyone knowing if something went wrong, I'm a very private person.

 

[Vickie]

I asked my DH not to tell anyone (outside of family) that I was pregnant until the first trimester was over (actually we only waited until the 13 week mark when we got our first scan-but close enough). I know that I would have been highly upset about it if he had gone behind my back and started telling people that I was pregnant. I don't think you are overreacting at all. Maybe (if you haven't already) you can sit down with your DH and explain to him why it is so important to you to keep the pregnancy to yourselves in the first trimester? Maybe he just don't understand where you are coming from?

 

[Always&4ever]

I'm sure he didn't mean to upset you, he obviously needed somebody to talk to and didn't want to hurt your feelings either