no_regrets_91
LTTTC 10 YEARS
- Joined
- May 19, 2011
- Messages
- 555
- Reaction score
- 1
Ok so I am sorry I know that I post on here alot. like a lot a lot, but I wrote this in my blog yesturday and I just re-read it and I realized that alot of you ladies on here may find it comforting. oh dear I hope I am not being narcacistic.(sp) I just want all of you to experience my new found optimism as you ladies have helped me more than you will ever know.
So here it is....
This thing that we are going through has been called a life crisis by many health professionals. The feelings that we are feeling have also been said to be comparable to the emotions felt by cancer patiants and those suffering with AIDS. It is no easy journey. It is difficult, it is heartbreaking, it is horrible, and we have no choice but to keep going. I have wanted for a very long time for something to come along that would change my mind. Something that would make it so that I wouldn't want a baby as badly as I do.
We want, we cry, we beg, we plead, we envy, but the most important thing we do, the thing that seperates us from the fertile population, is that above all of the other emotions that we feel, We Hope. Fate can throw many horrible things our way, from cysts, to endo, to pregnant friends and people with bad advice; after years of infertility fate may give you an ectopic or a miscarraige, you may lose a tube or have an unrelated surgery that causes scar tissue, you may over respond to your medications or you may not respond at all.
After all of the hell that we go through we still have hope. These things would knock any other person on their ass but not us, we have been through to much and we want this to bad. We all have days where we would love to just lie down and give up but the thing is, no matter how much we want to throw in the towl, the need for a baby is so much greater. The hope that we have in our hearts can never be overcome with grief. Sometimes on one of our off days it may seem like all of our hope is gone but it never truley is because the next day or the next cycle we are back at it, we are back to trying to achieve our dreams. If we had truely lost hope we would not have the strength to keep going. My point after this long rant is that no matter how dim things look there is a light at the end of the tunnel. At times it may feel like an illusion and other times it may seem so far away that you can't imagine ever reaching the other side but we are strong and we will keep going and some day no matter how many trains come at us and knock us out of the way we will reach the light and when we do the light will be so much brighter and so much warmer than it will be for those that have not had to endure the darkness.
I hope you enjoyed this. You ladies are wonderful, amazing, and your are so so strong even when you don't think so.
Have a wonderful day
So here it is....
This thing that we are going through has been called a life crisis by many health professionals. The feelings that we are feeling have also been said to be comparable to the emotions felt by cancer patiants and those suffering with AIDS. It is no easy journey. It is difficult, it is heartbreaking, it is horrible, and we have no choice but to keep going. I have wanted for a very long time for something to come along that would change my mind. Something that would make it so that I wouldn't want a baby as badly as I do.
We want, we cry, we beg, we plead, we envy, but the most important thing we do, the thing that seperates us from the fertile population, is that above all of the other emotions that we feel, We Hope. Fate can throw many horrible things our way, from cysts, to endo, to pregnant friends and people with bad advice; after years of infertility fate may give you an ectopic or a miscarraige, you may lose a tube or have an unrelated surgery that causes scar tissue, you may over respond to your medications or you may not respond at all.
After all of the hell that we go through we still have hope. These things would knock any other person on their ass but not us, we have been through to much and we want this to bad. We all have days where we would love to just lie down and give up but the thing is, no matter how much we want to throw in the towl, the need for a baby is so much greater. The hope that we have in our hearts can never be overcome with grief. Sometimes on one of our off days it may seem like all of our hope is gone but it never truley is because the next day or the next cycle we are back at it, we are back to trying to achieve our dreams. If we had truely lost hope we would not have the strength to keep going. My point after this long rant is that no matter how dim things look there is a light at the end of the tunnel. At times it may feel like an illusion and other times it may seem so far away that you can't imagine ever reaching the other side but we are strong and we will keep going and some day no matter how many trains come at us and knock us out of the way we will reach the light and when we do the light will be so much brighter and so much warmer than it will be for those that have not had to endure the darkness.
I hope you enjoyed this. You ladies are wonderful, amazing, and your are so so strong even when you don't think so.
Have a wonderful day
