So I just wanted to tell everyone about me as I go through my thread history I realize a lot can be very confusing. I just saw another member get "called out" so I want to make sure everyone knows about me.
Ok so here it goes.
I'm 21 years old with 1 daughter and I stay with my parents, I was actively trying ttc with my boyfriend. The reason why is because he is is 6 years older than me and wanted his first child. I stupidly agreed only because I thought it would take a looonng time for us to actually conceive and I was making preparations in the long run for when we actually conceived.
I thought it would take a while because I have endometriosis, an irregular period, and he told me his sperm count was low. I REALLY wanted to be pregnant again I had already gotten a job to support my daughter but I went out to find another. My boyfriend doesn't have a job but I thought "Oh well he'll have a job by the time i'm pregnant"
SO I've been on the TTC forum asking questions and starting thread. Although I thought it would be a while a part of me was hoping it happened soon because to be honest I really didn't think I could have children because of everything i'd been through with endo but I trusted that God would give me a child when he wanted me to have one.
So this is where it gets weird. I thought I was pregnant before and my boyfriend prayed about it and asked the Lord if I was pregnant and he heard the words "Not Yet" now I didn't believe him because I felt pregnant and I was having symptoms and everything so I took a test and it was a negative then my period came on.
Around the time I thought I maybe pregnant again I actually called a psychic and he told me I wasn't but that I would get pregnant next time I risked it. I didn't believe it. So around a certain date I got pink/brown tinted CM. I thought it was implantation but I was sad to see it lasted for 3 days so I thought it was AF. Then I realized it couldn't be AF because my AF IS super heavy! Then I figured it was ovulation and we had BD'd the day before. This time he prayed again and asked if I was pregnant and heard "It is so"...so weeks went past I wasn't really having symptoms except bad cramps and a lot of cm. So I really thought I was going to come on and since I'm irregular its hard to really track my periods but the last 2 months they've been coming around the same time. So around the day I thought I was late I took a test and it was positive. Later I went and took another one and it was negative , then went to the hospital and it was negative again (on urine and blood) so I was really devastated thinking I had a chemical pregnancy but it was weird because I felt God telling me that it wasn't over but I thought I was imagining because the doctor told me that the blood test was 100 percent accurate. The next morning I woke up and I started praying I ACTUALLY heard "Daughter you ARE pregnant" and my eyes popped open, I thought I was imagining things. I took another test and again negative so i definitely thought what I heard was in my head....Monday morning I woke up and something told me to test again. I did at it said PREGNANT , I wasn't happy at all. I thought "These stupid tests must be defective" it was a clearblue digital test and I've read a lot about them giving women false positives. So I was pissed, I had a doctors appt scheduled the next day so I decided to still go so they could tell me why this happened. On the way to the office I picked up another test , this time different brand. When they put me in the bathroom to pee in a cup , I stuck my won test in there...and gave it to them. I looked down at my test positive and they told me theirs came up positive to. I took another at home POSITIVE. I was SSOOO HAPPY!!!
But recently reality struck me....how would I tell my parents. My mother found out on accident, I knew she would be upset but I knew she wouldn't be the problem. My dad would/will be. He's kicked me out 3 times before. You see my dad is addicted to prescription drugs and he can be a very sweet guy but when he's mad he's horrible. He's told me he hoped I die before , he hoped I got killed , he called me a b*tch, a whore, he told my daughter she wasn't his grand child. He's just been bad and I've been trying to get out of this house for a long time.
My boyfriend STILL doesn't have a job. also he added to my stress by telling his ex that i'm pregnant and I couldn't figure out why the HELL he would do that knowing she's crazy? Now I know why....she kept calling and calling him over and over and over again trying to get back with him (she does that almost every day he has put on speaker phone so I could hear one time) then after he says no she threatens him...so he decided to tell her that i was pregnant which was a very stupid decision because she was pregnant by him twice before and had 2 miscarriages (because of using drugs) and she's CRAZY. So she threatened to come up to my job and kill me and slice my face open. I am SO pissed about this situation.
Anyways, through it all the lord has blessed me because my best friend and I found apartment we could afford together and we'll be moving in 1-2 so I am so happy about that.
So I just wanted to make sure you all knew about my story.
Ok so here it goes.
I'm 21 years old with 1 daughter and I stay with my parents, I was actively trying ttc with my boyfriend. The reason why is because he is is 6 years older than me and wanted his first child. I stupidly agreed only because I thought it would take a looonng time for us to actually conceive and I was making preparations in the long run for when we actually conceived.
I thought it would take a while because I have endometriosis, an irregular period, and he told me his sperm count was low. I REALLY wanted to be pregnant again I had already gotten a job to support my daughter but I went out to find another. My boyfriend doesn't have a job but I thought "Oh well he'll have a job by the time i'm pregnant"
SO I've been on the TTC forum asking questions and starting thread. Although I thought it would be a while a part of me was hoping it happened soon because to be honest I really didn't think I could have children because of everything i'd been through with endo but I trusted that God would give me a child when he wanted me to have one.
So this is where it gets weird. I thought I was pregnant before and my boyfriend prayed about it and asked the Lord if I was pregnant and he heard the words "Not Yet" now I didn't believe him because I felt pregnant and I was having symptoms and everything so I took a test and it was a negative then my period came on.
Around the time I thought I maybe pregnant again I actually called a psychic and he told me I wasn't but that I would get pregnant next time I risked it. I didn't believe it. So around a certain date I got pink/brown tinted CM. I thought it was implantation but I was sad to see it lasted for 3 days so I thought it was AF. Then I realized it couldn't be AF because my AF IS super heavy! Then I figured it was ovulation and we had BD'd the day before. This time he prayed again and asked if I was pregnant and heard "It is so"...so weeks went past I wasn't really having symptoms except bad cramps and a lot of cm. So I really thought I was going to come on and since I'm irregular its hard to really track my periods but the last 2 months they've been coming around the same time. So around the day I thought I was late I took a test and it was positive. Later I went and took another one and it was negative , then went to the hospital and it was negative again (on urine and blood) so I was really devastated thinking I had a chemical pregnancy but it was weird because I felt God telling me that it wasn't over but I thought I was imagining because the doctor told me that the blood test was 100 percent accurate. The next morning I woke up and I started praying I ACTUALLY heard "Daughter you ARE pregnant" and my eyes popped open, I thought I was imagining things. I took another test and again negative so i definitely thought what I heard was in my head....Monday morning I woke up and something told me to test again. I did at it said PREGNANT , I wasn't happy at all. I thought "These stupid tests must be defective" it was a clearblue digital test and I've read a lot about them giving women false positives. So I was pissed, I had a doctors appt scheduled the next day so I decided to still go so they could tell me why this happened. On the way to the office I picked up another test , this time different brand. When they put me in the bathroom to pee in a cup , I stuck my won test in there...and gave it to them. I looked down at my test positive and they told me theirs came up positive to. I took another at home POSITIVE. I was SSOOO HAPPY!!!
But recently reality struck me....how would I tell my parents. My mother found out on accident, I knew she would be upset but I knew she wouldn't be the problem. My dad would/will be. He's kicked me out 3 times before. You see my dad is addicted to prescription drugs and he can be a very sweet guy but when he's mad he's horrible. He's told me he hoped I die before , he hoped I got killed , he called me a b*tch, a whore, he told my daughter she wasn't his grand child. He's just been bad and I've been trying to get out of this house for a long time.
My boyfriend STILL doesn't have a job. also he added to my stress by telling his ex that i'm pregnant and I couldn't figure out why the HELL he would do that knowing she's crazy? Now I know why....she kept calling and calling him over and over and over again trying to get back with him (she does that almost every day he has put on speaker phone so I could hear one time) then after he says no she threatens him...so he decided to tell her that i was pregnant which was a very stupid decision because she was pregnant by him twice before and had 2 miscarriages (because of using drugs) and she's CRAZY. So she threatened to come up to my job and kill me and slice my face open. I am SO pissed about this situation.
Anyways, through it all the lord has blessed me because my best friend and I found apartment we could afford together and we'll be moving in 1-2 so I am so happy about that.
So I just wanted to make sure you all knew about my story.
You'll not be judged here.
