About to give up - help!

[kitabird]

My nipples are so sore and bleeding I can't take anymore. LO takes such a long time to latch and each attempt is excruciating, I'm sweating buckets with the pain! It's about 20 times worse than any pain from having the c-section I had exactly the same problems with DS1 and really hoped it would be different this time. I feel so useless

 

[summer rain]

You're not useless! Do you have any BF support worker or team you can call up and have them offer help in person? It sounds like maybe your baby has tongue tie or something similar, while a bit of discomfort when latching on is normal, excruciating pain is definitely not xx

 

[kitabird]

The BF support woman came out yesterday and didn't see anything wrong with LO's mouth. Unfortunately LO wasn't hungry when she was here so he refused to latch. She gave me loads of tips which I've tried and have gotten nowhere. I'd call her again but she's on holiday until the 31st so I'm on my own.

 

[Sproglet]

Please don't take the breastfeeding supporters word for it! Off the top of my head I could give you about 5 names of people (myself included) who were told their LO's mouth was normal, only to later find out it's not.

Gently lift LO's top lip and check that it lifts and folds back up to the nose (don't worry if there is a bit of skin between lip and gum, that's very common, it's how far the lip moves that's important). Run your finger left to right under LO's tongue and note if there's any obstacles- a 'speed bump' may indicate a problem, a 'fence' means LO does have a tongue tie. Finally give LO a clean finger to suck on (nail side down) and check that their tongue comes over their gums when sucking. If not, it could be tongue tie or a disorganised suck.

Catherine genna Watson has some great photos and more details on how to check for a tongue tie.

 

[b4baby]

I know exactly how you feel.
I have sore cracked nipples, terrible pain to latch on. had numerous health people watch me and all say its fine but something isn't right. my breast feeding support lady is pretty much refusing to come out to support me so i feel completely on my own. i have request a midwife visit tomorrow but if they don't come i think i am going to consider expressing. i am so upset about it and cry lots because i feel like i'm failing. doesn't help that i feel i failed on the birth already by not been able to push her out and ended in forceps.

 

[Sproglet]

I know exactly how you feel.
I have sore cracked nipples, terrible pain to latch on. had numerous health people watch me and all say its fine but something isn't right. my breast feeding support lady is pretty much refusing to come out to support me so i feel completely on my own. i have request a midwife visit tomorrow but if they don't come i think i am going to consider expressing. i am so upset about it and cry lots because i feel like i'm failing. doesn't help that i feel i failed on the birth already by not been able to push her out and ended in forceps.

Don't ever feel like you're failing! Though that's easier said than done, I know! I had a c section so didn't even give birth vaginally, so when we struggled with breastfeeding I felt 10x worse.

But expressing is not failing. I had to express from 4 days old because Robyn wasn't eating properly from me and was dehydrating, and then to top it off was given breast aversion. We now mostly feed direct, so expressing does not mean the end of a bf relationship. And EVERY support worker, HV, midwife I have spoken to has been impressed that when things got tough, we didn't abandon the idea of BFing.

Remember, rule number 1 is feed the baby. Rule number 2 is preserve your milk supply. If you decide to go down the expressing route, even temporarily, get a good double electric pump and you might want to look into finger feeding as this develops the muscles that baby will use at the breast- bottle feeding doesn't.

PS your 'support worker' sucks and doesn't deserve that name! What sort of justification do they have for not coming to see you? If you're really struggling to get help, it might be worth you seeing a lactation consultant privately, I know a lot of people have had fantastic results where support workers etc have failed to find the problem.

 

[rexxii2012]

Hi

To begin with i couldn't breastfeed at all because I had flat nipples and so I started expressing but I was exclusively breastfeeding but I got mastitis and my nipples were agony! But don't give up persistence pays off! I bought myself some Lansinoh cream from boots and got myself some nipple shields. Get some Medela Nipple Shields stick them on and they latch perfectly and you don't get cracked nipples. I now feed direct with nipple shields on everytime. They are amazing and I have no problems. Ignore all the rubbish that is said about them, if I didn't have them I wouldn't have continued breastfeeding.

 

[kitabird]

Please don't take the breastfeeding supporters word for it! Off the top of my head I could give you about 5 names of people (myself included) who were told their LO's mouth was normal, only to later find out it's not.

Gently lift LO's top lip and check that it lifts and folds back up to the nose (don't worry if there is a bit of skin between lip and gum, that's very common, it's how far the lip moves that's important). Run your finger left to right under LO's tongue and note if there's any obstacles- a 'speed bump' may indicate a problem, a 'fence' means LO does have a tongue tie. Finally give LO a clean finger to suck on (nail side down) and check that their tongue comes over their gums when sucking. If not, it could be tongue tie or a disorganised suck.

Catherine genna Watson has some great photos and more details on how to check for a tongue tie.

There's no sign of tongue tie as far as I can tell. He can stick his tongue right out and up to the roof of his mouth. He also CAN open his mouth really wide, it's just that he chooses not to

 

[kitabird]

Hi

To begin with i couldn't breastfeed at all because I had flat nipples and so I started expressing but I was exclusively breastfeeding but I got mastitis and my nipples were agony! But don't give up persistence pays off! I bought myself some Lansinoh cream from boots and got myself some nipple shields. Get some Medela Nipple Shields stick them on and they latch perfectly and you don't get cracked nipples. I now feed direct with nipple shields on everytime. They are amazing and I have no problems. Ignore all the rubbish that is said about them, if I didn't have them I wouldn't have continued breastfeeding.

I'm using lansinoh already, couldn't keep going without it! Tried nipple shields with DS1 without success, but might be worth another go.

 

[rexxii2012]

Hi

To begin with i couldn't breastfeed at all because I had flat nipples and so I started expressing but I was exclusively breastfeeding but I got mastitis and my nipples were agony! But don't give up persistence pays off! I bought myself some Lansinoh cream from boots and got myself some nipple shields. Get some Medela Nipple Shields stick them on and they latch perfectly and you don't get cracked nipples. I now feed direct with nipple shields on everytime. They are amazing and I have no problems. Ignore all the rubbish that is said about them, if I didn't have them I wouldn't have continued breastfeeding.

I'm using lansinoh already, couldn't keep going without it! Tried nipple shields with DS1 without success, but might be worth another go.

what nipples shields did you use? i used boots ones to begin with my baby wouldn't take them, get the medula ones I use and they are moulded into a cone shape so there is something hard for them to suck on.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Medela-Con...VW86/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1356260615&sr=8-1

I was told i was so inverted on one side i would never be able to feed but I now have a very good supply and feed off both sides. I know its difficult but you can do it!!!!

 

[kitabird]

Hi

To begin with i couldn't breastfeed at all because I had flat nipples and so I started expressing but I was exclusively breastfeeding but I got mastitis and my nipples were agony! But don't give up persistence pays off! I bought myself some Lansinoh cream from boots and got myself some nipple shields. Get some Medela Nipple Shields stick them on and they latch perfectly and you don't get cracked nipples. I now feed direct with nipple shields on everytime. They are amazing and I have no problems. Ignore all the rubbish that is said about them, if I didn't have them I wouldn't have continued breastfeeding.

I'm using lansinoh already, couldn't keep going without it! Tried nipple shields with DS1 without success, but might be worth another go.

what nipples shields did you use? i used boots ones to begin with my baby wouldn't take them, get the medula ones I use and they are moulded into a cone shape so there is something hard for them to suck on.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Medela-Con...VW86/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1356260615&sr=8-1

I was told i was so inverted on one side i would never be able to feed but I now have a very good supply and feed off both sides. I know its difficult but you can do it!!!!

I think they were the Boots ones I used. I've been really careful with LO's latch the past day and the pain isn't as bad, so fingers crossed we're on the right track. Will definitely try the medela shields if it doesn't improve though.

 

[rexxii2012]

Hi

To begin with i couldn't breastfeed at all because I had flat nipples and so I started expressing but I was exclusively breastfeeding but I got mastitis and my nipples were agony! But don't give up persistence pays off! I bought myself some Lansinoh cream from boots and got myself some nipple shields. Get some Medela Nipple Shields stick them on and they latch perfectly and you don't get cracked nipples. I now feed direct with nipple shields on everytime. They are amazing and I have no problems. Ignore all the rubbish that is said about them, if I didn't have them I wouldn't have continued breastfeeding.

I'm using lansinoh already, couldn't keep going without it! Tried nipple shields with DS1 without success, but might be worth another go.

what nipples shields did you use? i used boots ones to begin with my baby wouldn't take them, get the medula ones I use and they are moulded into a cone shape so there is something hard for them to suck on.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Medela-Con...VW86/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1356260615&sr=8-1

I was told i was so inverted on one side i would never be able to feed but I now have a very good supply and feed off both sides. I know its difficult but you can do it!!!!

I think they were the Boots ones I used. I've been really careful with LO's latch the past day and the pain isn't as bad, so fingers crossed we're on the right track. Will definitely try the medela shields if it doesn't improve though.

The boots ones didn't work for me the medula ones did and made everything so much easier and yeah I'm sure you will be