Advice about 11 year old gaming

[belle254]

Hi all, I have two toddlers age 2.5 and 3.5 but this post is actually about my brother, who is 11 and doesn't live with me any more. He lives with my mum just up the road and we see them about 1-3 times a week.
His gaming habits are getting totally out of control and I'm worried it will get worse and affect friendships and his ability to use his imagination amongst other things. It also sets a really bad example to my children when he spends every waking minute when he's not at school in front of the tv/on his phone or DS/on his laptop. He's been this way for years- he was a very difficult toddler and I think my mum used online games/devices to get him out of his moods sometimes, and its escalated.
I've talked to my mum about this before and she's aware of it, she used to limit his time to 1-2 hours per day but since Christmas this has vanished. She spends time reading/in the garden so it's not like she's a bad role model.
We can't take him anywhere without him moaning the whole time about going home, almost certainly so he can go back to his games. If she lets him he goes on his laptop first thing in the morning and straight after school until bedtime at 8/9pm. He spends a lot of time walking in circles thinking about games when he's not on them, and he's also started watching reviews of games online that bloggers have done and have lots of swearing/inappropriate content in them. He then repeats silly quotes and lines that these bloggers have said into normal conversations and it drives our family mad. I've mentioned this to my mum too and said my kids shouldn't be hearing it/watching him online all the time when he could be seeing us! She knows it could be a problem but hasnt done anything about it.
It saddens me when my children are so happy outside and making up games and my brother is only happy when he's in front of a screen. We went on holiday last year and he moaned and griped the whole week about not having games, that everything was boring.
Any advice how I could approach this subject with my mum again? It's really frustrating as she works in child health and knows well how damaging it can be. X

 

[jd83]

I'm sorry, I don't really have any advice as to what works. Just a similar story, really. My brother was exactly the same growing up, completely addicted to gaming. Actually, he still is, even as an adult. It's pretty much all he does with his free time, even late into the night. I think if your mom isn't willing to put electronics boundaries in place, then this is a problem she is responsible for allowing to get worse. And it will get worse. My advice is more for you and your kids. Just be sure to enforce moderation with them, and make sure you talk with them about the importance of play and beign creative. My kids have electronics, and have since they were toddlers. However, I make sure they don't ever get excessive with use of them, and that time is monitored. I don't want them to become an addicition. Obviously, electronics have their place in this technological world, and I want my kids to be able to use them and know how they work, etc, as well as benefit from the educational aspects like learning games. It really just comes down to consistency. I consistently monitor how long they've played, and tell them its been long enough, so its time to go play now. Sounds like your mom stopped being consistent with your brother, and allowed him to slide into an addiction level with gaming. How many times have you discussed it with her? Was the last time recent?