Advice about parents rights

[shortie1990]

Bit of a long one but I'll give some background info, my sister and her fiancé split up when their son was 6 months old, (he's 3 next month) it was all a bit nasty and he was a cOmplete knob, left her in debt, and just has nothing to do with their son and didn't help what so ever, him and my OH fell out as they were good friends, and that was that.

My nephew started going to FOB's mums house every weekend but still wasn't seeing his dad(his dads choice) my sister didn't trust him and it was known to nursery he was not allowed to be picked up by that side of the family, as we were concerned about where my sister would stand if he. Picked him up and just decided to keep him..

So we all told my sister to tell him to take her to
Court to make everything official, so they both knew where they stood, of course that hasn't happened and slowly he's made his way back in, and picks him up from nursery has him over night etc, and h and my OH have even started goin out for drinks (not awkward him coming round at all..!)

So me and OH went to the local pub with indoor play area last night and met him there with my nephew, all seemed well, and he was staying there the night, but told me he had been questioned about how much my sister owes nursery (about 3 grand!!) so said he was really embarrassed, and wasn't taking him in the morning and was just going to look after him for the day as he wasn't working (fair enough!)

Next thing I knew my mum was ringing asking my OH to send her his number as he's been round to my sisters and had an argument and said he's keeping my nephew!

It turns out my sister has ended up telling FOB she doesn't want him any more and wants him to have him..(wtf this argument was about I have no idea!) but obviously every one says things they don't actually mean, and she was on the phone crying her eyes out asking for us to ring fob and sort it out!

So what rights do they have? Is she goin to have I go to court and get him back that way? Can he really just keep him?

Any help would be brilliant

 

[sophxx]

If he's on the birth certificate and your sister doesn't have a residence order from court then there's nothing the police can do they can advise him to bring him home but your sister will probably have to go through court this happened to my friend it took 3 weeks to get to court but they made tge dad hive him back to her even through they were lots of other things going on. X

 

[cherryglitter]

i didn't know the father could do that. that scares the crap out of me.

 

[sophxx]

^ if there on the birth certificate they have just as much right as the mother to have lo. X

 

[shortie1990]

Yeh he's on the birth certificate, and I just said to my mum he's not actually doing anything wrong, and seen as they've not got a residency order, or any custody etc, he's technically just as much right as she has..

What happens with court? Doesn't it cost a fortune?

 

[mum22ttc#3]

Yes what Sophxx said, I had a friend it happened too, as long as the father is on the birth certificate then he has as much right to keep the LO with him as the mother does.

I don't know how long it takes to get to court or how much it costs etc but I know they can tend to drag things out and with Christmas it will probably take that bit longer.

 

[EllaAndLyla]

Yeh he's on the birth certificate, and I just said to my mum he's not actually doing anything wrong, and seen as they've not got a residency order, or any custody etc, he's technically just as much right as she has..

What happens with court? Doesn't it cost a fortune?

Is he on the birth certificate with equal rights? I remember when we signed Lylas and she asked if we wanted equal rights and we had the choice to choose so or not. If he doesn't have equal rights then what he's doing might be able to be taken through the police x

 

[mum22ttc#3]

Yeh he's on the birth certificate, and I just said to my mum he's not actually doing anything wrong, and seen as they've not got a residency order, or any custody etc, he's technically just as much right as she has..

What happens with court? Doesn't it cost a fortune?

Is he on the birth certificate with equal rights? I remember when we signed Lylas and she asked if we wanted equal rights and we had the choice to choose so or not. If he doesn't have equal rights then what he's doing might be able to be taken through the police x

Really? Me and OH was never asked this for any of our 3. Not that I mind having equal rights and would have said yes anyway.

 

[shortie1990]

Yeh he's on the birth certificate, and I just said to my mum he's not actually doing anything wrong, and seen as they've not got a residency order, or any custody etc, he's technically just as much right as she has..

What happens with court? Doesn't it cost a fortune?

Is he on the birth certificate with equal rights? I remember when we signed Lylas and she asked if we wanted equal rights and we had the choice to choose so or not. If he doesn't have equal rights then what he's doing might be able to be taken through the police x

Thagts strange, when we've been for both Naomi and Riley they've not asked us that

 

[Baby France]

Gosh...I bet she regrets that comment!

I think she needs to go round herself to talk to him and I'd be the nicest person in the world. Once I had my babies back in my arms I'd run back home and lock my doors until it could be sorted by court.

That would terrify me. She needs to go around and apologise for anything thats been said, but maybe that's just the desperation I'd feel if my babies were possibly not coming back for Christmas!!

 

[emilyjade]

baby france has said everything i was going too!

play nicely until she has her son back then whatever from their.

i was also told with DS in 2009 that if OH was on the birth certificate he'd have as much right as me but i agreed to that as OH wouldnt do anything silly.

I hope this can get sorted ASAP x

 

[shortie1990]

Thanks ladies,

Little update -

I spoke to my sister last night, who said my nephew and His dad was at his mothers house, and his mum must have talked some sense into him and has agreed for my sister to come and pick him up at 9am today, but my OH met him at the pub last night, so the first night he's had him from my sister and e dumps him at his mums to go out!!

Apparently my sister didn't say to take him, she but did say he was to take him for the night which was arranged (Monday night)

But we'll never know exactly what was said, but as soon as he's back home, he's no longer going to his nanas house at weekends as usual, and his dad isn't seeing him, until things have been made legal, so he can't take him when ever he feels like, which isn't fair on the child, or his nana, as it's Christmas, so I've said to my sister to arrange to go round with him on christmas, but not to drop him off and leave.

 

[mum22ttc#3]

Only just read your update. So glad your sister got it sorted, I think thats best if she doesn't let him see him unsupervised until its all sorted via court, like you say it's not fair on your nephew to be messed about like that.