advice. Thinking breast feeding

[princessatmey]

this may sound weird from a 3rd time mum. Am 21+6 with bubs 3. I want bf have always wanted try one kids. I had bad experience ish with my sone (1st) after i was stitched etc i fed him tried 2 for 10 mins mw held his head my breast. This was 1pm ish. By 5-6pm i hadnt fed him again yet, mw hadnt said feed etc an new mum etc didnt have clue, was on phone my mum mentioned it an she said ask so i buzzed after call an nurse whtever told me just feed him, i felt like crying didnt no wht do, any ways a mw must noticed hed no been fed an assisted me but he kept cumin off( strong neck/head) an i tried express into syrindgr got very little. Mw said he needs feed an doc get involved if he dosent etc so i just said bottle feed (i was still disorentated frm labour an bp was high on high dose meds too). So i was quit glad not bf as was on antidepressants and bp meds. I had nvr held bubs befor so i believe tht combined woth his strong head/neck made hard for me.i had it in my head try again second preg but i want forceful enough an mw presumed botle fed as son was ( i gave in as it ment others could feed her to) again i was on antidepressants an was put bp meds 32 weeks. Its early yet but i really want try this one. I stopped antidepressants at 9-10 weeks due severe ms and my pyhchiatrist agreed try off them, so far bps ok to, an i made myself frm day1 say mw am bf lol. Am just total freaked as i have no clue, oh laughs as i hate him touching breasts so he says how can i handle bubs feeding. I was plannin trying express after while so others could feed but i dnt work so tech dnt have too,weras prev 2 pregs was supposed start back when they were 3months. I feel as i know how hold bubs now an feel comfortable holding then i possible could succed in bf, but i worry mw will be asses again an i am not a very forward person, i would sit an bear/stew etc.

 

[petitpas]

Sorry to hear about your bad experiences
All I can say is just always say you want to breastfeed when someone asks.
Maybe it's a good idea to go to a breastfeeding group before you give birth to get some information on how to hold a baby and help it latch on. I found it a bit tricky at first as I automatically wanted to support my baby's wobbly head but that can stop the baby from leaning back to open wide and feed.
The more you know before you arrive at the hospital, the less you need the midwives' help although I really hope they are nicer to you this time round.
Big hugs and good luck with this one. When it works, breastfeeding is really lovely. It just takes a bit of getting used to at first.

 

[princessatmey]

thanks. With my son (1st) i had him larger hosp 2.5hrs away, my local dosent do high risk pregs etc. I may speak hv about groups but i think closest at the 2.5hr away hosp. I go a mum group (home start) so may ask them too. Its a fault of mine not ask for help, hell i was first time mum an nvr really buzzed an i had severe pre e so bp still hig an on high dose meds. I had my home mw vis yest an she gave me 60 pg book on bf. (off to a gd start). I just feel so nervous and i no ill probs end up stopping bf if i do or not doin it at all . Oh tells ppl i culdnt bf our son cause my arms are to short lol. I seem have strong necked bubs ie pretty much hold there head up birth, there small 2 (son 6ib 12oz, daughter 6ib 7oz). I no bp best etc an hell lot cheaper (not got lot money, 2 toddlers in nappies 2, trying get least one outa them before dec).

 

[petitpas]

Yes, have a good chat with your health visitor about breastfeeding. She will be able to support you when you give birth. Also let your midwife know what you are planning. Usually, a midwife comes to see you the day after you leave hospital and they can keep visiting until you feel comfortable feeding

I don't know where you are but sometimes there are breastfeeding groups in the community (not run by hospitals), more like a coffee morning where mums go with their babies and feed and chat. I hope you can find one near you. Otherwise, keep stating your intentions to your health professionals. They can help you. Good luck with everything!

 

[noon_child]

Do you have birth plans where you are? If so you can write in there that you want to breastfeed but will need help as never done it before.

Also in some areas the HV visits before birth so you could talk to her at that point about your worries so she is prepared to support you.

Some old school MW's do manhandle your breasts and your baby but most lactation consultants don't as it is an intimate part of your body, can stress baby out and doesn't help you learn. So again if you have a birth plan you can write in it if you don't want the midwife to handle your baby or breast to help with feeding.

Everything you described about your early experience sounds very normal. My LO fed after birth but from that point on refused to wake up to latch. I hand expressed and got a few tiny drops - THIS IS NORMAL - which were syringed in to LO's mouth. Thankfully after about 6 hours of no latching, a proper lactation consultant came to see me and helped with different positions to try.

Educate yourself about breastfeeding, what is normal, what can be the problems etc. as knowledge is power. The thing is every baby is different and some take to bf really easily and some struggle and you can't tell till you try. All you can control is how much help and support you get and make sure you stand up for what you want.

 

[princessatmey]

thanks nv coming nxt month, dunno if for new 1 or my other do or diff reason, been seing here due other issues. I did my birth plan on fri when mw was out for home vis an mentioned bf to her an i think mentioned about son an not really having option with second. When she was little i think i tried getting her in position, to see if i could hold her tht way. Breast wasnt out obv lol. I got 60pg book on bf and dvd, watched today an ill probs watch again.

 

[emeeorevan]

Invest Ina really great electric double breast pump! Even if you can't personally bf you can pump and a great pump is something you can't not go cheap on! Trust me, the hand held are horrible, time consuming and hard to use if you are having any trouble expressing.
I've been there with DS#1 and made it two months personally bf with DS2 then pumped for one more month
with a decent pump. Now plan on getting a medela double electric its about $250-$300 US but everyone says its worth it.