advice.....

[vickilouise]

now i'm not one to jump down anybody's throat but i am at my witts end with my partners mother and his aunties!!!!
I know its her 1st grandchild but telling me what not to name it, not to find out the sex, who the god parents are going to be, what religion its going to be, what school its going to is setting me ready to explode i dont know whether its me being over sensitive but i really am having trouble with the way she is. i feel like saying to her this baby is mine and your sons, you've had your children, reared them and made your own decisions so dont try and overun my life and leave us to do what we see fit.
arrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
i like getting advice from people aslong as it is just that advice and not ramming their own views down my throat!!!
i dont know how to put it without being nasty as i know she is only being what she deems as nice and helpfull and i dont want to cause bad blood between myself and his mother.

 

[poppy]

What's your partner's reaction to all this? Does he support you or does he tend to let his mum tell you what to do?

 

[vickilouise]

bit of both to be honest i dont think he wants to hurt his mums feelings by telling her to butt out but he doesnt want to see me upset. he doesnt like it as i dont

 

[Always&4ever]

Poor thing, I'm pretty lucky with my OH's mum, she stays out of it

 

[vickilouise]

Poor thing, I'm pretty lucky with my OH's mum, she stays out of it

dont get me wrong shes a nice woman just a bit overbearing.
i dont know whether i'm being over sensitive or whether she really wants to over take my life lol.
im keeping my distance for a while anyway.

 

[Tam]

I would do my nut!! Who do people think they are?!?!? Just do your best to ignore it hun, she can't do anything anyway, which is the main thing! x

 

[Journo Becks]

I had a similar situation when I moved house, all of a sudden I was being criticised for not putting up the right curtains in the right room, or for not doing this or that right or what not. I know it's not quite the same but even that situation really upset and offended me. When that happened to me the only way I could see of handling it was to ask my partner to have a word. I know I wouldn't have been able to be diplomatic about the situation and probably would have said something awful/wrong if I had spoken to her. Fortunately my situation cooled down and and no words were necesary, but perhaps if after keeping your distance she doesn't back off, you could ask your OH to take her for lunch and talk to her about it?

 

[Jules]

I have had the same problems, mine has pointed out names they dont like and like etc and even wanted to come and stay with me for the week once its born!!! I was really stressing myself out about it as i would definately not want her staying and interfering with what i was doing, so i had words with my OH and he had words with her, she's still fine with me now. Any future problems i am just going to get it off my chest in future, as its my baby not hers, shes had her time with her own children.

So tell your OH to have words, its best to be diplomatic tho and save the rows, i just said to my OH i want the three of us to have quality time when the babies born, people can visit but we need time on our own to get used to being a mummy and daddy, he was happy with this explanation.

As for the names i was fuming and said i will call my baby whatever i like, i also told him not to discuss the names with her until we had choosen one and then its tough if they like it or not!!!!

 

[vickilouise]

dya know what jules it sounds like OH's mothers are two peas in a pod. i told my OH if she harps on i will find an 'out there' name that i like and call it that just despite her...

Ive had a word with my OH hes says he will have a word with his mum (good luck to him on getting a word in edgeways lol) seriously though as my dad said if someone is willing to say things like "oh dont be finding out what sex... its going to go to ...... school" then they're willing to be told to shut up and that its my child.
i just dont want to be rocking any boats.
oh well for the time being im not going around im still seething over what she said last time. so ive told my OH that he will just have to stay at my house from now on.

 

[cutie_wutie]

Best way is to ignore !!!!!!!!!! At end of day Its your baby and you have every say in the upbringing of you unborn xxxxxxx So everytime they say stuff bear in mind its your baby they dont have a say.. just say thank you for you advice ill bear it in mind xxx will keep the peace anyway xx you dont want any arguments whilst pregnant xxxxxxx